BajaNomad

Border Woes

motoged - 11-6-2018 at 02:50 PM

They could be headed to Baja...

Snowbirds amassing at U.S. border
(letter reprinted from Kelowna Daily Courier, October 25, 2018)


A White House senior aide has disclosed that the sheer number of retired Canadians amassing along the northern border is creating consternation amongst top U.S. State Departments and the Department of Homeland Security. Experts anticipate that half a million of these snowbirds will migrate to the U.S. over the next month, dwarfing the immigrant caravan crossing Mexico, and placing undue stress on the quality of life for many Americans, while posing a growing security threat‎
“It’s too much,” lamented the anonymous aide. “It’s a struggle for citizens in Florida, Arizona and California to find a tee time, the pickleball courts are full and God help you if you want to find a parking spot at an outlet shopping mall. ”

Evidence collected last winter raised concerns that the normally reserved Canadians are exhibiting more uncivilized behaviour these days.

“We have reports that Canadians were telling jokes about our president. And across the southern US, pot-bellied over-the-hill Canadians in pastel golf shirts would walk into bars in the late afternoon, demanding $2.50 for highballs and a buck and a half for a beer, proclaiming that happy hour was here. Like they were tragically hip or something.”

The aide was asked if anxiety surrounding the Canadian caravan permeated the White House.

“Look, I can’t speak for everyone here, but we love Canadians - Conrad Black, the Reichmann family, Pamela Anderson. But we cannot ignore the burden this influx of Canadians places on us.”

The security concerns are heightened by Canada’s recent decision to legalize recreational marijuana. U.S. officials are wary of baby boomer potheads bringing their debauched drug habits over the border.

“It seems they’ve all been told to say the same thing to our immigration officers,” said the aide. “When they ask Canadians if they have ever consumed marijuana, they get this apathetic stare and the standard response, ‘Who me?’

“We’ve searched luggage and repeatedly found boxes of instant brownie mix hidden under lumberjack coats, but there’s nothing we can do.”

The Canadian snowbirds want to ensure that empathetic Americans understand their plight. One traveller going through US immigration at the Calgary airport put it this way: “We sacrifice a lot leaving our homeland each winter - Bloody Caesars, people saying ‘you're welcome’ instead of ‘uh-huh,’ 24/7 coverage of the Leafs on TSN. But you must realize that we suffer from a brutally oppressive winter regime so we have to seek seasonal asylum in your country.”

This is expected to become a pivotal issue in the run-up to the U.S. mid-term elections. Canadians are advised to slip over the border while they still can.

chuckie - 11-6-2018 at 03:08 PM

Doug Ford asked me to move back as a partial offset...I'm holding out until a law is passed prohibiting the sale or consumption of poutain...

motoged - 11-6-2018 at 03:10 PM

It's "poutine"....

"Poutain" has quite a different meaning....

[Edited on 11-6-2018 by motoged]

chuckie - 11-6-2018 at 05:09 PM

Hooker... I knew that...

chuckie - 11-6-2018 at 05:20 PM

GED really has lost his sense of humor, EH?

woody with a view - 11-6-2018 at 06:59 PM

At least they go home every year after spending a grip of loot!

Bajaboy - 11-6-2018 at 07:01 PM

Quote: Originally posted by woody with a view  
At least they go home every year after spending a grip of loot!
:lol::lol::lol::lol:

Timo1 - 11-7-2018 at 05:55 AM

I came down here this year and was going to try to be one of those "cheapo" canucks I keep hearing about and try to save a few bucks.
Well that didn't work out.

bajabuddha - 11-7-2018 at 07:35 AM

Sure, come to Baja with a $20 bill and one extra pair of clean underwear.... and no intention of changing either..... ;)

Meany - 11-7-2018 at 07:50 AM

:bounce::bounce::bounce:

motoged - 11-7-2018 at 08:22 AM

Quote: Originally posted by bajabuddha  
Sure, come to Baja with a $20 bill and one extra pair of clean underwear.... and no intention of changing either..... ;)


I was supposed to bring a clean pair ????

Merciless bunch of SOB's.....:biggrin:

volcano - 11-7-2018 at 08:44 AM

love your humor, Ged

weebray - 11-7-2018 at 09:06 AM

I knew they were coming, I saw my neighbors slapping their elbows. They should not be allowed to cross the border until they take back Justin Bieber.

joerover - 11-7-2018 at 09:03 PM

yea


those damn Bolivans rolling up here to have there children get papers

I explained to the border just yesterday,
60 inches tall means a maximum of a 30 inch waste, thin girls cut the line.
Fat ladys put to much stress on the food store,
60 inches tall by 60 inches around go back
who pays for all that food?

Venezolana is prettier than colombiana, think about for a while.


[Edited on 11-8-2018 by joerover]

joerover - 11-7-2018 at 09:50 PM

Click migrant caravan and cry a tear drop
https://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2018/11/06/100-people-kidna...

"For years, organised crime has preyed on migrants passing through Mexico, from taxing them to use established routes to kidnapping them and imprisoning them in safehouses."

[Edited on 11-8-2018 by joerover]

BajaMama - 11-8-2018 at 06:20 AM

Hilarious!

motoged - 11-9-2018 at 10:29 AM

Quote: Originally posted by joerover  
Click migrant caravan and cry a tear drop
https://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2018/11/06/100-people-kidna...

[Edited on 11-8-2018 by joerover]


I am not sure if you are being sarcastic....?

Or have compassion ?

joerover - 11-9-2018 at 01:08 PM

"Unless Mexico lives up to its obligations to migrants, it risks being dismissed as self-serving "
https://www.amnestyusa.org/most-dangerous-journey-what-centr...
"There are also reports of extortion and ill-treatment by police and immigration officials. Tragically,"

The news does not report the truth of how Mexican Police treat illegal migrants. The story the Mayan girl from Chimaltenago told me was far worse than anything on the net.


Quote: Originally posted by motoged  
Quote: Originally posted by joerover  
Click migrant caravan and cry a tear drop
https://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2018/11/06/100-people-kidna...

[Edited on 11-8-2018 by joerover]


I am not sure if you are being sarcastic....?

Or have compassion ?


[Edited on 11-9-2018 by joerover]

Lee - 11-10-2018 at 01:19 PM

Quote: Originally posted by joerover  
"Unless Mexico lives up to its obligations to migrants,

[Edited on 11-9-2018 by joerover]


Obligations? What obligations? Funny.

joerover - 11-10-2018 at 01:49 PM

https://www.nytimes.com/2018/11/10/world/americas/migrant-ca...

The migrants’ goal is Tijuana, across the border from San Diego, a route that avoids the crime-scarred states of northeastern Mexico.

Tijuana is no bien para ninas

https://www.nytimes.com/2018/11/10/us/deployed-inside-the-un...

[Edited on 11-10-2018 by joerover]

Lee - 11-10-2018 at 03:08 PM

Quote: Originally posted by joerover  
"Unless Mexico lives up to its obligations to migrants,

[Edited on 11-9-2018 by joerover]


Obligations? What obligations? Funny.

joerover - 11-11-2018 at 12:22 AM

They want to migrate without documents,
and
stop illegal migration into Mx

Quote: Originally posted by Lee  

Obligations? What obligations? Funny.


Dont dish it out if you cannot take it.

Is Mexico still building a wall, on the border with Guatemala_+?>

Marc - 11-11-2018 at 07:33 AM

Palm Springs is crawling with them now. Easy to spot; pasty white & over weight, usually at dental and health clinics.
Thankfully we are going home for the holidays.;)

[Edited on 11-11-2018 by Marc]

joerover - 11-11-2018 at 09:06 PM

looks like Tj is next

https://www.cbsnews.com/pictures/migrants-caravan-honduras-m...

akshadow - 11-11-2018 at 09:42 PM

looks like a political post

JoeJustJoe - 11-12-2018 at 08:16 AM

Quote: Originally posted by joerover  
looks like Tj is next

https://www.cbsnews.com/pictures/migrants-caravan-honduras-m...


Since the election is over, the caravan, is not being covered in the news, and it was only a manufactured crisis designed to get the right-wing base out to vote to counter the blue wave.

Maybe when the caravan actually makes it to the border, it may become news item again, but nice try Joeover.