Osprey
Ultra Nomad
Posts: 3694
Registered: 5-23-2004
Location: Baja Ca. Sur
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For all Baja Neatniks
Coming Clean
It won't be necessary to name names. You know who you are. We sure as hell know who you are; we know everything about you. Perhaps this is the
perfect time for somebody to speak up, tell the truth, even if it hurts.
We see the silent little shudders you make when you see beach sand all over the bottom of our boats. We feel the hair going up on your neck when you
spy some dried fish blood on the transom that somebody missed. You feel so superior when you notice that some of our rods, reels show some corrosion.
It's the same way at the house, the garage, when you look at our tools, our yard, trucks, cars. That sort of "isn't that awful" look and posture of
disdain. You can't help it. You can't help being neat, fastidious any more than you can keep from breathing. Some of you may even think being neat
is a kind of "manly" thing. Most of us think it's a feminine trait; we see you as being sensitive and subjective, sometimes judgmental. Usually
you're quiet about your disrespect, your pity.
You hate us. Admit it, you think we're "slobs". You're thinking "that guy really doesn't care about his equipment/truck/fishing gear. Maybe he
doesn't even see the dirt, the rust. Maybe to him it's invisible. God, I couldn't live like that."
We are Hate Free. We exist to make you feel superior. And we DO know the difference, we see everything. We just don't go all to pieces about it.
We see it. That black/purple spot in the bed of my truck is some marlin blood from a big striper I caught two years ago. Oh, I could really get down,
pick at it, scrape it up but I haven't because when I see it I can almost relive the day. There's a little black thing that looks like part of a big
spring lodged in the hinge of the tailgate of the old Ford. It's not a piece of metal, it's part of a tentacle of the biggest gosh darnned squid I
ever caught; more than six feet long, probably 70 pounds; 1997 or 98 I think it was. These are not just spots, they're memory markers....wash them
away and you lose all the precious memories of the adventure.
While you're watching THIS OLD HOUSE on TV, we're watching BILL DANCE FISHING. While we're kickin back, relaxing, you're on a tear. You have
somehow hooked your self-esteem up to just how clean and neat your things are, your life is. You hustle about keeping things shipshape; still
carrying all that hate, disdain around with you.
All your spotless trucks (you washed the paint off them), your polished reels, gleaming lacquered rods, your shining boats and motors set us apart,
draw a deep line in the sand that you can feel good about. You can fail in business, be a failure as a parent, a husband, a neighbor, fail to find
the freedom and joy of retirement , BUT, as long as all your stuff shines you can feel good about yourself --- all because of us.
On the economic front, you spend more money on cleaning solvents, soap, wire brushes, etc. We hold up our end at a higher level, forced to buy new
things, the old ones fall into disuse because of deferred maintainence. In fact, we are more likely to have two of the same tools; neither one works
well because they are rusty -- you have only purchased one and it still shines -- there's a whole world of merchandising out there that we alone
created. We are undoubtedly the inspiration for all "two for one", "buy one, get one free", and "bonus" sales.
So there you have it. Our sanity is intact, our leisure hours are each, a full sixty minutes. Our knives are not quite as sharp as yours but can
cut bait and line. We'll thank you to remember that, if and when your frustrations overboil. You couldn't mount much of an organized military
campaign against us -- too busy putting everything in slots, neat little rows, codifying, color-coding, sealing, establishing re-order protocols.
As a piece of friendly advice,(long overdue, if you ask me), when you have everything you own sealed, tagged, filed and lined up; when you can't find
one more solitary thing that needs de-rusting, painting or polishing, when your anxiety is at it's all-time peak, spill a little something on the
floor (some blood from a big old marlin, if you've got it).....then just leave it.
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Dave
Elite Nomad
Posts: 6005
Registered: 11-5-2002
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| Quote: | Originally posted by Osprey
That black/purple spot in the bed of my truck is some marlin blood from a big striper I caught two years ago. Oh, I could really get down, pick at
it, scrape it up but I haven't because when I see it I can almost relive the day. There's a little black thing that looks like part of a big spring
lodged in the hinge of the tailgate of the old Ford. It's not a piece of metal, it's part of a tentacle of the biggest gosh darnned squid I ever
caught; more than six feet long, probably 70 pounds; 1997 or 98 I think it was. |
Stinky!!!
I'll bet no one will steal your truck.
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bajalou
Ultra Nomad
Posts: 4459
Registered: 3-11-2004
Location: South of the broder
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Well said, Osprey
I sure don't want to wear the paint out on my stuff by washing it.
 
No Bad Days
\"Never argue with an idiot. People watching may not be able to tell the difference\"
\"The trouble with doing nothing is - how do I know when I\'m done?\"
Nomad Baja Interactive map
And in the San Felipe area - check out Valle Chico area |
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Bruce R Leech
Elite Nomad
Posts: 6796
Registered: 9-20-2004
Location: Ensenada formerly Mulege
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Mood: A lot cooler than Mulege
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wow that is cool I think that may have been the best thing I have read this year. Thanks Thanks and thanks again.
Bruce R Leech
Ensenada
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Baja Bernie
`Normal` Nomad Correspondent
Posts: 2962
Registered: 8-31-2003
Location: Sunset Beach
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Mood: Just dancing through life
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Osprey
This stuff you have been posting here is far and away better than the story you sent me. Really great stuff. Some one else said it--put this all
together in a book.
Your insite into people is truly showing through with these posts.
My smidgen of a claim to fame is that I have had so many really good friends. By Bernie Swaim December 2007
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Dave
Elite Nomad
Posts: 6005
Registered: 11-5-2002
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| Quote: | Originally posted by bajalou
I sure don't want to wear the paint out on my stuff by washing it.
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And the added layers of dirt protect the finish. It's a scientific fact! Look it up.
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Me No
Banned
Posts: 444
Registered: 11-24-2003
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| Quote: | Originally posted by Bruce R Leech
wow that is cool I think that may have been the best thing I have read this year. Thanks Thanks and thanks again. |
DITTO. I am speachless. Maybe for the first time.
I have a few friends to send this too.
Dave: I have empirical evidence of that.
[Edited on 6-16-2005 by Me No]
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yankeeirishman
Banned
Posts: 1070
Registered: 3-5-2004
Location: Kalifornia
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I dont bother buying books at Tower Books anymore....the stories here are far superior! You story Sir...has a spinal cord to it.
What control freaks there are here. Don\'t believe that post you just read!
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Skipjack Joe
Elite Nomad
Posts: 8084
Registered: 7-12-2004
Location: Bahia Asuncion
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I'm convinced that all 'neatniks' are mentally ill.
Anyone see the biography of Joan Crawford? An extreme neatnik.
Yet they often do well in society. Probably because they are driven.
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Sharksbaja
Elite Nomad
Posts: 5814
Registered: 9-7-2004
Location: Newport, Mulege B.C.S.
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Thanx Osprey
I'm saved! I love all my dirty crap too!
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bajalera
Super Nomad
Posts: 1875
Registered: 10-15-2003
Location: Santa Maria CA
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Sheesh, Osprey! Get yourself a different woman.
\"Very few things happen at the right time, and the rest never happen at all. The conscientious historian will correct these defects.\" -
Mark Twain
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Don Jorge
Senior Nomad
Posts: 638
Registered: 8-29-2003
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Osprey, you are cracking me up! Nice stories. I am guilty of keeping my boats and equipment clean, maintained and safe, but not my workshop, house
or life. After all, one must establish priorties.
Peenchi neatniks!
�And it never failed that during the dry years the people forgot about the rich years, and during the wet years they lost all memory of the dry
years. It was always that way.�― John Steinbeck
"All models are wrong, but some are useful." George E.P. Box
"Nature bats last." Doug "Hayduke" Peac-ck
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Eli
Super Nomad
Posts: 1471
Registered: 8-26-2003
Location: L.B. Baja Sur
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Mood: Some times Observing, sometimes Oblivious.
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Osprey, I salute you. I am among the not so great maintence folks; When I see a big house, I wonder who doing all the sweeping and mopping all those
floors, who?s stuck washing all those windows. I like things kind of neat, but I don't wanna expend much time on it, so I keep my spaces small and
simple.
Anyway, your comments took me back to Pop's trailer, sure you have been there. Remember his stacks of books, ah yes and his computer, the mouse and
keyboard from hell, black smudged, dusty smokey mess that I loved.............sigh, yes, those are the best of memories.
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Mike Humfreville
Super Nomad
Posts: 1148
Registered: 8-26-2003
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The last time my reels were polished or my rods lacquered was on the floor of the sporting goods store before they were sold. Every scrape and marred
surface lofts an old memory. What would life be without the clutter of fading remembrances?
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pappy
Senior Nomad
Posts: 679
Registered: 12-10-2003
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good to know i am not alone(and mexitron) some people see my well used,, fully crusty and caked with "leftovers" camp stove and cringe-i just
laugh......
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bajaden
Nomad
Posts: 496
Registered: 4-7-2005
Location: Ensenada
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Mood: vicarious
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Osprey, you sly dog. I had no idea you had met my ex-wife. Well, gatta go, I have a bunch of cleaning to do.
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Bajame
Nomad
Posts: 458
Registered: 6-12-2005
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Mood: Baja Dreamin
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Karma
Must of been a neat freak in my last lifetime as this life I can't stand things array but wasn't given the nack to keep things organized tho I am
getting better. Have friends like that tho. You know what they say about perfectionist. That's one who takes alot pains in detail and gives them to
everybody else! Everytime the mess gets clean-up I can't find anything!
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