RandyMacSC/SO
Special Correspondent
Posts: 422
Registered: 2-2-2004
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Any helped appreciated. Flat surface problem...
I have reached a point where I am seeking some help, as I believe there must be someone on this message board that has had similar experiences of this
nature with someone they know or care about dearly.
My big brother, who is one of the nicest most kind hearted persons ever of emense proportions has a flat surface problem, and I am trying to find out
how to cure him of it.
I have just thought of glueing pyramids on top of all flat surfaces in the house so he can no longer put loose coins, mail, newspapers, and anything
else that comes out of his pockets on these flat surfaces. urrrgggH!!!
It has to be a syndrome or something, and I thought he was cured of it late last year, and then I go away for a while and when I come back, the flat
surface bug crawled inside his noodle again and is back.
Any suggestions would be appreciated.
 At my wits end, cause tomorrow I start glueing pyramids on all flat surfaces.
RandyMac
[Edited on 3-19-2005 by RandyMac]
[Edited on 3-19-2005 by RandyMac]
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Ole' Irish saying (Gaelic): 'Go neirigh an bothar leat, go mbeidh an gaoth choiche sa droim agat, is go mbeidh tu thuas ar neamh leath-uair roimh is
eol don diabhal go bhuil tu marbh'.... OR 'May the road rise up to meet you, May the wind always be at your back, and May you be in Heaven a half hour
before the Devil knows you're dead'
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Mexray
Super Nomad
Posts: 1016
Registered: 8-30-2002
Location: California Delta
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Mood: Baja Time
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That's an easy one...
I have the solution written on piece of paper....er, it's right here on my desk....let's see, I know it was here in the stack somewhere....no wait, I
remember, I put it on the table in the spare room...there it is...NO, drat, I know it's in one of the piles of stuff - I just layed it there a day or
two or ten ago! Right near that box of Pacifico depositos I plan to take back down to Mulege in October!
Well, If I find it while sorting stuff for that yard sale I planned to have a couple of years ago, I'll pass it along...
According to my clock...anytime is \'BAJA TIME\' & as Jimmy Buffett says,
\"It doesn\'t use numbers or moving hands It always just says now...\"
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RandyMacSC/SO
Special Correspondent
Posts: 422
Registered: 2-2-2004
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Okay I'm just going to stretch out on a limb here...
deja vu? See things ahead of time?
workaholic? Always working?
party animal? 10 or more cervesas
Hose A
Mexray
so = com see com saw
11 11 12 12 2012 (pattern?)
To be heard within a herd...
RandyMac
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Ole' Irish saying (Gaelic): 'Go neirigh an bothar leat, go mbeidh an gaoth choiche sa droim agat, is go mbeidh tu thuas ar neamh leath-uair roimh is
eol don diabhal go bhuil tu marbh'.... OR 'May the road rise up to meet you, May the wind always be at your back, and May you be in Heaven a half hour
before the Devil knows you're dead'
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woody with a view
PITA Nomad
Posts: 15937
Registered: 11-8-2004
Location: Looking at the Coronado Islands
Member Is Offline
Mood: Everchangin'
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a sure-fire cure for all that lays flat....
you go get yourself one of thhose blowers that the neighbors landscaper uses to blow all of their cuttings into your yard. preferably very loud.
randomly, when enough flatstuff has accumulated, you wake up said offender to the sights and sounds of all of that stuff blowing through the house
after the third or fourth wake-up, he'll be cured. or at least you'll start to look forward to those piles instead of dreading them.
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RandyMacSC/SO
Special Correspondent
Posts: 422
Registered: 2-2-2004
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I found this so called issue is such a trivial siutation comparatively....
and my brother and I have been discussing why we do what we do.
I open cupboard doors and don't take anything out of them, and I also open the refrigerator, and just check, and it is a habit formed along time ago,
and I will ween myself off of it. My big bro saves everything, and then takes things out of his pockets or what he buys at Wally World (WalMart or
Canadian Tire) and leaves the stuff in bags and places things on tops of flat surfaces.
We are sons of a WWII war veteran that came out of a prisoner of war camp when WWII ended, shortly after landing on the beach at of Normandy on D-Day
after he lied his age at 15 to act 16 so he could enlist in the Canadian army to defend freedom, and starved like so many others, and when the war
ended, he came home at a mere 87 pounds, married the love of his life, became a CPRail engineer, raised a family and was agood father.
My older brother was born Dec 16, 1951, just 6 years after the end of WWII. I was born in April 18, 1958 and our family home is in Upper Sunningdale,
a subdividion designated by the governemnt of Canada as a special subdivision made available to war veterans to buy or rent to raise their families.
Obsessive compulsive disorders probably to keep things interesting , but all these disorders are just a label and Ibeleve alot of them are caused by
living in drama:
When I was real young, I followed my father around and everything he did, I did or mimiced, as a little boy that wanted to do everything his hero did.
When my war vet father opened a cupboard door and peered in, and did not take anything out, and closed the cupboard door and then went to the next, to
repeat the what many believe to be a crazy process, I followed and did the same. When my father opened the refrigerator, didn't take anything out, and
just checked to make sure the food was still there and available for is family. I picked up the habit, like absorbing it from him, and have done the
same, and I recognize it does seem real strange to some people.
When I got married to a childhood friend and Italian girl, she talked to my mother and asked why I would do this crazy routine that drove her nutz. My
mother told her, that my father was just checking to make sure there was enough food still available to feed his family.
My former with Maryann did not really understand and thought it was all just so crazy. Now that she has a family of her own, as I divorced from here
back in1991, she has told a common friend, now she now appreciates why RandyMac did the obsessive compulsive habit that I learned from following my
father around.
I now make a effort to catch myself before I do it again.
My older brother's obsessive compulsive nature is to buy stuff he doesn't really want or need and then place these things on flat surfaces after
buying the stuff from Wally Mart or Canadian Tire, and he now knows that he really doesn't need it.
Money affords many things, and it does make people comfortable, but somehow, we, as people are bombarded by media messages daily, hourly, to buy
stuff just for the sake of buying it, but do we really don't need it, as if we really look closely, most of this stuff doesn't really do much for us
to improve our lives.
I now ask myself the following at least 4 up to 7 times, before I actually buy anything major, other than some basic food items which are necessary:
"Why do I want and need this item, and how is it going to improve or change my life for the better, if I actually do decide to buy it?"
What the Baja Has Taught Me:
I really think travel to the Baja has helped me to change my life for the better, and mainly from being fortunate enough to meet some real down to
earth happy families, mostly Mexican families, and the more simple lifestyles has helped me to realize and put things into perspective, that I am much
happier having next to nothing, buy choice, as having too much stuff, means I have too muc to look after or worry about, as the stuff is just stuff,
and it seems to just complicate my life more.
I now do a self inventory and a my stuff inventory and found that 60% was not really used at all, or that important to me, so I have purged the
majority of this so called important stuff, by giving it away to people and families that could really make some use of it.
I hope to purgue more and eventually get it down to a just a backpack, a passport, a wallet, a plan of places and people to see, perhaps a beer
huggie, my magic routines, 3 bandanas, and I am off to see and meet interesting people to continue a nomadic journey.
Maybe I'll buy my own burro, and become a real Nomad. My brother and I are soon building a Teepee or a yurt in the backyard, so we have a special
place to go to and relax.
So the flat surface issue and my affliction is not so important after all, and in fact are rather trivial to worry about as it is something to
challenge and conquer it, or to overcome of worrys and fears.
The narrsistic me me me gluttenness attitude is all to common and I think things are going to get real interesting soon.
[Edited on 3-23-2005 by RandyMac]
[Edited on 3-23-2005 by RandyMac]
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Ole' Irish saying (Gaelic): 'Go neirigh an bothar leat, go mbeidh an gaoth choiche sa droim agat, is go mbeidh tu thuas ar neamh leath-uair roimh is
eol don diabhal go bhuil tu marbh'.... OR 'May the road rise up to meet you, May the wind always be at your back, and May you be in Heaven a half hour
before the Devil knows you're dead'
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Gypsy Jan
Ultra Nomad
Posts: 4275
Registered: 1-27-2004
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Mood: Depends on which way the wind is blowing
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Help us out, Randy
I think that we need an annotated version of your experience (with footnotes). 
i.e., a little bit more explanation, please.
“Travel is fatal to prejudice, bigotry, and narrow mindedness.”
—Mark Twain
\"La vida es dura, el corazon es puro, y cantamos hasta la madrugada.” (Life is hard, the heart is pure and we sing until dawn.)
—Kirsty MacColl, Mambo de la Luna
\"Alea iacta est.\"
—Julius Caesar
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Skipjack Joe
Elite Nomad
Posts: 8084
Registered: 7-12-2004
Location: Bahia Asuncion
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FSS
I googled Flat Surface Syndrome and have to tell you that to me it doesn't seem to be anything abnormal at all. In fact, it seems to me, that the
people that insist that all flat surfaces be kept neat and clean all the time are the ones that are obssessed. The ones that maintain a spotless
surface and reorganize it 30-40 times a day.
I don't think having a desk piled high with papers is an indication of any mental abnormality. The same goes with people that keep a reasonably clean
desk.
Having said that I did meet one individual that seemed bizzare at the time who may be what they are referring to as FSS. His bedroom didn't have a
stick of furniture in it. Everything lay on the floor. A mattress, scattered books, electronic parts of a computer that he was assembling. It looked
like a dump truck had thrown everything on the floor. All rooms were like that. On the other hand he was a reasonably to fairly intelligent man who
was able to generate a 6 figure income and on the surface seemed to be well adjusted.
That man was the closest thing I ever met that approaches the description of 'FSS'
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bajalera
Super Nomad
Posts: 1875
Registered: 10-15-2003
Location: Santa Maria CA
Member Is Offline
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Thank you, Joe. I needed that.
Lera
\"Very few things happen at the right time, and the rest never happen at all. The conscientious historian will correct these defects.\" -
Mark Twain
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Skipjack Joe
Elite Nomad
Posts: 8084
Registered: 7-12-2004
Location: Bahia Asuncion
Member Is Offline
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Randy
I don't think I was much help. I do have a son that has ADD so I have some idea of what it's like living with someone that has those kind of problems.
First, I would recommend that your brother be correctly diagnosed by a medical doctor and that he acknowledges that he does indeed have FSS. If he
feels that this is a personality trait you could struggle with him for years over neatness issues without anybody agreeing on anything.
Once he accepts the diagnosis then I would seek help in the form of drugs that may help the cause of his affliction.
Since this seems to be a compulsive obsessive thing I don't think you can deal with it by simply making rules about when he can leave things lying
around. He probably can't help himself.
The other thought that comes to mind is to create environments where there just isn't enough room for things to be scattered around. Say an RV trip to
Baja. Cleaning up an RV is probably a lot easier than your home.
The bottom line is that you will probably be picking up after him as long as you live together. As long as you realize that he isn't doing this
because he is lazy or because he doesn't want to do his share it makes it easier to pick up after him.
Dr. Phil
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RandyMacSC/SO
Special Correspondent
Posts: 422
Registered: 2-2-2004
Member Is Offline
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Is it really so important? Not so important. Now love for one another is...
I appreciate all your comments, as I also think this way, and realize that no matter what, he is trying to be just himself, and so am I. I only hope
my other brother will realize that life is short and one day we might not be all together to enjoy it all.
But that is okay to, as he will find his way and I can't and don't want to change him as I love him too, just like I care and love so many other
poeple.
My rambing mad man thoughts on the next message below.
So flashback messages:
http://forums.bajanomad.com/viewthread.php?tid=7951
http://forums.bajanomad.com/viewthread.php?tid=6433
"To tell you the truth Randy
I am beginning to wonder if there is intelligent life on this planet!!
There was a thread a while back on this subject. Of course there is. I've seen their vehicles."
j.r
========================
SO: What is intelligent anyways? People tell me I am intelligent, and have so many gifted talents, but I try my best to be humble, and shrug it off,
as I only think I know just enough to be slightly off my noodle, and perhaps I enjoy being down right weird to some, but that's okay with me, as I
felt I was trying to be far too responsible for so long, and found out that there is more to life than trying to dead on center all the time to please
others.
=========================
I now know who my true loving friends are, as one time I became so blind to the obvious, so when I decided to cut the money out of the equation, I saw
the rats scatter.
And I am so pleased I am now living more in the now for today, and just trying to be me, as I once was so happy before I made my life so complicated.
I have a loving my family and friends, and that's most important to me, as it is what life is all about to me, as my life is a spiral of friends and
family to me, and all that goes and comes with it. Never perfect, or just SO, but never boring either. Just SO.
Now that makes me wonder?
I asked this simple yet elusive to some question a while back on Baja Nomad to stimulate some thoughts. Interesting that we can discuss or share out
thoughts now isn't it, as perhaps some get too focused or myopic on the subject of Baja California, when life is life, and even though we have a
common love or like for the Baja, there is a way to share and get along if we try. Okay, those are just my thoughts, or are they just my toughts?
And does it really matter?
Subject: Do you believe intelligent life exists on other planets in our universe?
RandyMac
Special Correspondent
"Intelligent life
I believe there is intelligent life on other planets. I am not too sure about this planet earth. Someone is bound to ask you what this has to do with
Baja. I will not do that."
posted on 10-30-2004 at 10:25 PM Do you believe intelligent life exists on other planets in our universe?
---------------------------------------------------------------
eg... Correct. Once you viote you only see results. I am waiting for emperical evidence to confirm. In 2001 we went to Africa for a total solar
eclipse with a group that included Dr. Frank Drake, founder of SETI. Lots of interesting discussions as well as INCREDIBLE stargazing!
grover
posted on 10-31-2004 at 06:10 AM I wonder how that distributed supercomputer effort is working out. Juno tried that a few years back. A nifty
little piece of software that's embedded in their ad banner. Every connection comes with a little piece of homework for you! They said they were
going to sell the computational ability to pharmaceuticals to be used for drug design.
I digress. Of course there is intelligent life out there. They are both smart enough to get here and, once having taken a look around...
...to make "warp 9" or better in an escape trajectory. Them's that can, do.
j.r.
posted on 10-31-2004 at 06:42 AM To tell you the truth Randy I am beginning to wonder if there is intelligent life on this planet!! There was a
thread a while back on this subject. Of course there is. I've seen their vehicles.
Instead of being so blunt or direct, I always try to throw a feel ideas into the wind to see what comes of it.
C.S. Intelligent life
I believe there is intelligent life on other planets. I am not too sure about this planet earth. Someone is bound to ask you what this has to do with
Baja. I will not do that.
If there is no fishing in heaven, I am not going
This is why I come here. To be alive and stimulated about life, to ponder what, where, when, why and who, and how, or the why of it all, and after
reading about others thoughts, I am stimulated to continue my journey in the spiral of life.
I found myself not trusting one day and I knew I was dying inside and then I had to find a way to trust again, and the first person and only person I
needed to change was myself, as I now trust myself and now I feel so much better about life and I am so ver fortunate to have so many friends, and so
many I can't wait to met in person.
I look forward to meeting so many Baja Nomad's that I can hardly wait, and if I think about it too much I might just get so exicted I'll pee my
pants, and I wouldn't want to do that now, would I?
Or maybe I wouldn't mind peeing my pants? Now that is downright weird Mac!!!
Take care,
Going to check in on my wonderful neighbors that purchased the war veteran houses on either side of this dwelling, that my older bro and I call home.
RandyMac
[Edited on 3-24-2005 by RandyMac]
[Edited on 3-24-2005 by RandyMac]
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Ole' Irish saying (Gaelic): 'Go neirigh an bothar leat, go mbeidh an gaoth choiche sa droim agat, is go mbeidh tu thuas ar neamh leath-uair roimh is
eol don diabhal go bhuil tu marbh'.... OR 'May the road rise up to meet you, May the wind always be at your back, and May you be in Heaven a half hour
before the Devil knows you're dead'
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RandyMacSC/SO
Special Correspondent
Posts: 422
Registered: 2-2-2004
Member Is Offline
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Thanks all and thanks Skip Joe...
If only more people would think this way we might just get some where, but time is time, and people have there own schedules in their own spiral of
the timewave, and it is not always in synch with myself or my time or everyone else or their time. As we are all individuals of choice in our own time
in the spiral.
That's what makes life so interesting to me.
More Crazy Far Too Lengthy Ramblings of a Mad Hatter Canuck and Cold weather man waiting to warm my core up again one day so I can just be calm and
stare at the stars and the sunsets in the Baja:
Perhaps I spent too long in cold, and my noodle is still frozen solid? The wonderful yet sometimes miserable weather, makes me appreciate the baja
more, as my longing for warmer weather and friendship of wonderful people I always meet when in the Baja and other areas of Mexico keeps me longing
and going when my day gets boring?
First off, as I said before, I am so, a little off my noodle, and that is very okay with me, as long as I remember, to be humble, know who I am, why I
am here, and where and when I might want to go next, and how I'll decide to get there is not so important, as it is a mystery of the future, as today
is the most impoertant day to be alive.
The wwwwhow of it all.
Skip everything if I ramble about, as it is not so important to read or digest any of this mad hatter banter.
Why do I enjoy Baja Nomad message board so much?
Simple answer: My love of meeting interesting people.
And this message board does have it's moments that are far from boring, as I find that I like drama just as much as others like a little drama, to
keep life from getting too boring.
So I watch, like some others, who perhaps just like to watch it all unfold in time, and maybe some are like voyeurs of drama:
voy?eur n
NOT THIS VOYEUR: 1. somebody who is sexually excited by looking, especially secretly, at other people?s naked bodies or the sexual acts in which they
participate
(BUT THIS VOYEUR 2. somebody who is fascinated with, or persistently observes,
distressing, sordid, or scandalous topics or events
Maybe some come here who enjoy the banter of their own form and cultural of Vul?gar Lat?in and that of others? Who really knows why and does it really
matter, as just being here now may be enough? However that is a matter of each and every individual to decide for oneself what ammters most to them.
Vul?gar Lat?in n
the form of Latin that was the common spoken language of the western Roman Empire
I am a nomadic voyageur, who enjoys watching and learning from others, as I have seen and have also done so myself the following:
sometimes jump in head first, sometimes feet first, sometimes with one toe in, sometimes I hesitate, sometimes I never jump in at all, sometimes I
slowly walk into the water, sometimes can't dive in at all as I migt hit the bottom if I dive too deep, and sometimes I won't, and sometimes I am not
ready, sometimes I will do it later, somtimes I say tomorrow, sometimes next week, sometimes I say maybe never again, and sometimes I tread lightly
with one finger in and two toes out, and other times, I just do the belly flop into the middle of the pool, making a big splash, to let everyone know
that I am no different than anyone else who can make the bigger ripple in time, if I so chose to do so and see what comes splashing back at me, and
then there are the tornado kamakazi times like my rambling craziness, diving full tilt at the playa, like a rambling buzzing, and perhaps annoying
bi-plane, just waiting to hit the water full or maybe the solid dirt at full tilt speed of rambling thoughts, just to see what happens next.
I love people, meeting them, and hearing of their life, and reading about their spiral of life stories, and I also want to tell a few, but I do get a
little out there, and perhaps wound way too tight sometimes, like a focused out of focus tornado pilot in time, never knowing exactly when or exactly
why, or how or with who I'll be on a voyage in time within the spiral of life.
But that is the fun of it all. At least to me.
If it wasn't for my angel of a brother, whom I refer to as the 'da biga guy', as my nephew refered to him when was real young, "Where da big guy go?,
perhaps I wouldn't be alive today, to type in my crazy or slightly offcenter thoughts today or previously on this very message board that I enjoy so
much.
People can chose to read my thoughts, comment what they want, when they want, or not at all, and they may not want to read it at all, as it is all
about individuals choice to spill some thoughts to see where they may scatter, just like a drop of blood, or a little bit of water, or a rock in a
pond.
And it is all okay with me. As I came here for friendship and I found more than I ever dreamed possible, and I am ever so greateful for that.
Everyone in Life Goes Trough Stress at one time or another, and we do mask it out at times, and I try to learn from it, to find a balance of happiness
and stress, as life needs a bit of stress to make the hapy times more important and memorable.
My older bro and I share the family house that our parents moved into back in 1953. A dream they had to have and raise a family after such a stress
filled time in our world history.
The very war veteran house that I share with my older bro, was left in my mother and father?s will to the siblings of 3 brothers and a sister, and it
is is stated that it will always be available to all of us, anytime, no matter what. It will always be the family homestead and accessible as a safe
place to gather ones thoughts. My parents wanted it that way, so we would always have a home and a roof over our head, now matter what happened when
they passed on.
We all, as loving siblings, always understood and continue to maintain their wish.
We have a sister in Saskatchewan, and she and my brother (oh yeh he is a borther in law, but a brother tom me) and I also have a younger brother, who
has his own house in our home-town.
I like to travel, and love Mexico and the Baja, and the other 3 are more homebodies that stay closer to Canada and home. SO, I am the curious
explorer, as I love to meet people, from all walks of life, so I must have some kind of bug in me, as I was probably an ancient nomad, or a North
American Indian or some other ancient soul in a previous lifetime or so I feel most of the time.
We love each other, we have our differences of opinion, but no matter what, being a family is very important to us all.
And everyone in the family has issues at times, but we always sort things out, over time, and have a little fun doing it, but we also know, that we
will always have some little issues with each other, sometimes, as we are each individual thinkers, and we were brought up to broaden our minds by
being open to others thoughts and ideas, but we were also taught not to absorb and believe everything we see or here, as life is about making
individual choices.
My young bro Mr. T. is sometimes, not always, Mr. Fastidious, and the younger was kind of spoiled by us older siblings, and that was our doing, not
his, as we all gave him many things as he was the baby of the family, and didn't always have it so easy.
Now after his struggle in his formative years, he wants, needs and likes everything to be in it's place and so spotless all the time, so much that
when sometimes when I or we go to visit, we almost feel afraid to sit down and mess anything up. Or it used to be that way, and now it's better now,
as we sat down as a family and sorted some things out.
He used to be a constant complainer, as work is not always easy, but we learned to live with it, as we can't and don't want to change him, as he is
our little now older wiser brother, of the tough love kind, and will decide to change himself if he so choses to do so, as we love him for who he is
not who we want or think he should be.
Being the youngest, as I think back, may have been tough on him, as he may have picked up some of his habits from the painful time when he spent his
formative years in the hospital burn unit, from 2 until 4 1/2 years of age. Where the food was terrible, where one didn't have anyting to console him
at night accept his mind and thoughts of the boggie man and the fire, and the burn unit was a bit of a crazy place, as he and all the other children
would throw temper tantrums, in the drama for attention, and tossing food and everything they could pick up, get near or touch, and make sure it went
all over the place was an activity that kept the minds off the pain.
Then the nurses and janitorial staff would have clean the burn unit children up, and the janitors (probably another job title or label now) would
clean up all the mess as a result of the drama for attention, and these little people and burn unit patients would be reprimanded for being so messy.
Not by all, but definitely by some that lacked patience and a caringness of understanding that part of their job was to care.
Health Care Workers. Not an easy job, but definitely one that I admire as there are many good ones out there, and for that I am ever so thankful.
And My pain was that I ran away from him when he was on fire, as I did not know what to do, until I watched my mother run back into the house and roll
him in a carpet. After the attendents back then wrapped him in a sheet and placed him in the bathtub, I crawled under the bed, and cried my eyes out
for days and months that he was asking me for help.
When my mother and father told me he was goin to be okay and live, I began to come back to life, but was never allowed to visit him for that time as
hospital rules said only parents, and one at a time back then, and no young kids.
So I used to make snow angels below his fort floor burn unit room in the snow, for my little brother to let him know how much I loved him, and he
never forgot. We talked about it recently, as we did when he came down to the Baja to visit me.
He now knows why I building crazy sand carvings in beach sand down in the Baja, and why I stated giving stuff away, and wanted to rid myself of money.
Fast forward.
We looked after him as our father and mother wanted him protected, as a little family member should be, as other kids can be so crewl when he was
young, and a little more than vulnerable. And even though I couldn't count the many times I had to lay a thumping on some real bullies, now I know why
he wants to keep me in line, and wants to look after me, and my older brother. It is just the way it is and it is now fine with me as that's just his
way to show how much he loves us.
Why do I even bring this up on Baja Nomad?
I have some wants and needs and as much as this is about the Baja, I do learn so much from obtaining feedback from oter Nomads, and like to watch the
goings on, and read all that I can read, and have learned that unless I stay busy, I'll go mad.
And it is human nature to be curious, and people will poke their thoughts into other thoughts, as that is just the way it is. The Baja Nomad society
of common interest or interests, and then that of, not so common interests amongst people from all walks of life, that come here to participate, learn
and impart their thoughts and knowledge.
It would be so very boring if we all thought the same, don't you think, and that's why I enjoy this beautiful message board, for all it has to offer,
as it is a diversity of thoughts and feelings about life in the spiral of life.
I know I'm a bit kamakazi, as my younger brother would say, as I travel, was very involved in business a few years ago, and now I don't say much days
or for months, and then I fly in once and a while, like a Japanese kamakazii pilot a crazy mission, spewing bullets of bizarre thoughts that pop into
my noggin, then I disappear like a phoniex into the ashes of the night. Perhaps that analogy is not the best one to use on a message board that is
more populated with people south of the 49th paralelle
The Baja Nomad message thread is a healing source to me, and have learned so much of how I can learn from others to sort some of my own issues out.
For that I am ever so thankful that my older brother encouraged me to find a safe place to feel a little better each day, and I now exercise my
talents, wants and needs. One day, I'll get to the point where I will publish my thoughts and many expereinces, but first I have to slow down a bit
and take baby steps, so now I stop the kamakazii stuff and I read and enjoy and maybe add a cartoon or two. To be more balanced and consistant in
life, and tha's the goal, but not to the point of being stuffy, as I'd rather shoot myself than allow myself to ever get were I once found myself when
the quest for money became the evil attractor to me.
Now I want for very little other than friendship and to just be and love people for who they are, not how others want them to be.
I was searching for some answers for a few years of why I started to not get along with my younger brother, and then it hit me like a ton of bricks.
You are the kamakazzi traveler businessman, and he lives in a small company town where things don't change very easily or quickly. People are set in
their ways, but life does find it's way to be good here.
We are getting older and set in our ways and we grew apart for a while as we needed a break from each other.
Now we are tighter than ever, as three brothers should be, or we always said we would be when we were younger, as we are more willing to just learn
from each other, and to accept each other as the way we are, not they way we or anyone else expects or wants each of us to be.
If it wasn't for the encouragement of my older brother I might not have ever found or even looked for a community of people on Baja Nomad.
When he found that I had become so depressed after coming back from Mexico to my home town, he encouraged me to get back to drawing and enjoying the
simple things in life, and conversing with people, neighbors, and reading books and stories, and encouraged me to write as a felt, as he said he
always wanted to read of my journeys and all the pople I have met and all about my thoughts of places I have been and seen.
When I was feeling so depressed a few years back, and still get a little depressed sometimes, but only for a few hours and not very often, I always
think of just how good I have it to be alive and have so many wonderful friends.
I'm still working away as, the spiral of my life is a work in process, and I learn to change myself by listening and learning from people on the Baja
Nomad, by reading their thoughts and ideas about life.
Why are some pople obessive compulsive with constant cleaning? Never had the problem, as I just try to stay balanced, if I can and it is never easy.
Just one quick search on this 'Cleanliness is next to Godliness' stuff, and guess what, perhaps the cure is not so important, as it is all about
someone's own chosing, and being within reason or a finding their own sense of balance. Perhaps humans have to find categories, as there is too many
labels, to pigeon hole people, and maybe there just isn't enough focus and true understanding of what love is for oneself as an individual, and for
each other. The world is focused or out of focus, and it is a spiral event.
I'm just here to enjoy the ride, as I am not trying to figure it all out, as I once thought I could do. Not possible and not that important.
That's why I say to my friends in my hometown, I have lived a thousand lifetimes, and today is my first day here on earth and what a place to be right
Now.
Everyone I now meet I tell them that my name is SO, short for Slightly Off-Center, or come see, come saw.(??? spelling)
http://letters.webvalence.com/sites/UniqueUHealthyU/Broadcas...
Patricia's Perspective
Cleanliness is next to Godliness... or is it?
I grew up in a home where things were kept tidy and clean but not obsessively so. I remember having friends whose parents were obsessive about order
and I recall how uncomfortable I felt in their houses. So it was interesting that when I set up my very first home on my own (a fairy tale cottage in
Seattle) I became a perfectionist in my need for order. I liked to have everything clean, neat, orderly and just so.
Then I met my husband Bob and our difference in styles became apparent. My partner, a very creative and "out of the box thinker", into all kinds of
exciting projects, just didn?t spend much time making sure that the vase of flowers was at a 90 degree angle to the table ? he felt he had better
things to do with his time.
I intuitively knew that it was important to acknowledge my partner?s preference to have a more relaxed household and not push him into doing it my
way. We figured out that I needed a room to myself where I could be a perfectionist and then we could both relax in the rest of the house. It worked!
And it was a tribute to how couples can work things out without using a difference in styles to fuel conflict.
What is really interesting is that as I have grown I have become more creative and more interested in many different areas of life and I no longer
choose to spend my time being "perfect". And believe me, it does take time! I see that my need for order comes from a need to feel in control of my
life. Letting go of that need has given me so much more creativity and play-time. I have also become acutely aware we really are not "in control".
A further gift I received was to realise that I fell in love with Bob for many wonderful reasons but precisely because he was creative, exciting,
dynamic ? an artist, writer, woodworker, craftsman ? a renaissance man. To have required of him to match my idea of perfection and order in the
household would have been to stifle all the wonderful qualities that had drawn me to him in the first place.
If you are struggling in relationship with someone, take a look at the exercise under Healthy U Tips and see if there is meaning for you in the
answers.
Perhaps by giving that special person in your life the latitude to be who they are, you both can be happier.
Healthy U Tips:
1. Am I trying to get my partner, (friend, spouse) to behave more like me?
2. Am I trying to whip them into shape because my way is right?
3. Do I know what?s best for my partner (friend, spouse)?
Book Review
Loving Each Other. Leo E. Buscaglia, Ph.D.
I read Leo Buscaglia's books when I was in Seattle about 20 years ago and they made a big impact on me in terms of my understanding of love. Here is a
quote from the book jacket.
"Loving relationships, though necessary for life, health, and growth, are among the most complicated skills. Before we can be successful at achieving
relationships, it is necessary that we broaden our understanding of how they work, what they mean, and how what we do and believe can enhance or
destroy them.
It's up to us to give our relationships a chance. There is nothing greater in life than loving another and being loved in return, for loving is the
ultimate of experiences."
I always make a special effort to give relationships a chance, and I also know first hand that loving another or others and being loved is very
important to living a full happier life, and it also helps to keep boardem and depression at bay for me, as my love for other poeple is my energy
source. My friends always wonder why I go away for a while and come back so full of energy like I have the strength of 20 men and 5 women, as we all
should know that women are more resilient and live longer on average then men.
Now that might stimulate a discussion, and ought to get some blood pumping.
Slightly Off-Center
alias RandyMac
the Crazy Canuck who dreams of the Baja most every evening during REM sleep and the dream state or my dream time journeys of never worrying whether
the silver chord is going to snap, but more of why and how it snaps me back.
[Edited on 3-24-2005 by RandyMac]
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Ole' Irish saying (Gaelic): 'Go neirigh an bothar leat, go mbeidh an gaoth choiche sa droim agat, is go mbeidh tu thuas ar neamh leath-uair roimh is
eol don diabhal go bhuil tu marbh'.... OR 'May the road rise up to meet you, May the wind always be at your back, and May you be in Heaven a half hour
before the Devil knows you're dead'
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