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Author: Subject: Dirty Miguel
Baja Bernie
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[*] posted on 4-20-2007 at 01:23 PM
Dirty Miguel


I have known Dirty Miguel for over 30 years and I have never known him to participate in what is commonly understood to be the activity of work. Once I did see him lean on the handle of a shovel for an extended period of time. One of the working guys whispered something in his ear and he suddenly dropped that shovel like it had turned into a hot poker. A few weeks later I asked him about this incident of almost work and he replied, “Trabajo es no bueno por el alma” (work is no good for the soul) “Oh, Seńor Burnie, I almost committed a terrible sin—everybody knows that to work is not good for the soul.” That was Miguel; he would do just about anything to avoid the stain of ‘honest’ labor.

Miguel did have a ‘regular’ job—really more like a position—as a gatekeeper at Campo Mariposa (butterfly). He was a true filosofo (philosopher) who had gone beyond the needs of modern man. Or! Perhaps he had never acquired those needs that seem to afflict other, more common, people. He had no need to bathe and rarely did so. Changing clothes was a far to involved endeavor to occupy his time. He has been known to wear the same clothes for over a year. He might take his overskirt off if he got too warm. You immediately noticed the increased aroma and the fact that his undershirt was no longer white, it had turned to a mottled earth color as a result of continual wear. His boots once black were scuffed beige with use. His beat up old, plastic, kinda gray, cowboy hat never left his head unless it fell off or he went to bed.

Removing his hat was his idea of getting undressed. He got his hair cut almost every year and he shaved but rarely.

Miguel thought of himself as a regular “Don Juan.” He was always asking the women in the Cantina to dance. This normally happened just after he became so drunk that he could hardly stand much less dance. He considered himself to be bi-lingual because he could say, “wanna buy me a drink.” He proved his bi-lingual ability quite often. Miguel would remove his hat with a flourish as he asked the ladies, “Lady wanna dance.” You could not help but notice the hay sticking out of his hair as he removed his hat.

Dirty Miguel was really a great guy and you could learn a lot from him—if the wind was just right—and you could get close enough to hear him. On a weekend you could usually find him sleeping in the weeds just down the hill from the Cantina. He usually started waking up when he could no longer avoid the glare of the sun shining in his face. Picture the sun and you will realize that this was just about noon!

Gus loved to tell the story of Miguel and one of his drinking buddies, he only had one at any given time, they just were unable to keep pace with him when it came to the bottle. It seems that Miguel and his most recent friend had been drinking Tequila most of the night and found themselves lying in tall weeds at daybreak. A rattlesnake was making its way across Miguel’s chest. Noticing the snake, his friend grabbed a half full bottle of Tequila and started to club the snake to death. Miguel suddenly awoke, seized the bottle, and screamed, “Don’t do that! You’ll break the bottle.” At this they both started laughing, rolling around, and fighting for the bottle. The snake wandered off after biting Miguel. Seeing this, his buddy, of the moment; exclaimed, “We gotta get you to a doctor.” Taking a great slug of booze Miguel just laughed! They finished the bottle and passed out again. No, he didn’t go to the doctors and he never seemed any worse off for the rattlesnake poison.

Apparently, one poison cancelled out the other.




My smidgen of a claim to fame is that I have had so many really good friends. By Bernie Swaim December 2007
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Bajagypsy
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[*] posted on 4-20-2007 at 01:34 PM


Miguel sounds like a real character, one of the type of people you can never forget!
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FARASHA
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[*] posted on 4-20-2007 at 01:52 PM


:lol: good Boy - Miguel saved that Bottle!! Funny ! Thanks Bernie - quite inspiring! Will have to reconsider my LIFESTYLE!! >f<
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[*] posted on 4-20-2007 at 03:05 PM


Miguel was a regular Zorba The Mexican. My kind of man.

Thanks Bernie, keep'm coming.
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[*] posted on 4-20-2007 at 06:51 PM


Oh Bernie! Another one of your Classic Tales!! When I read your words, I can see who and what you are speaking of.Ya got the magic in your hand, and in your mind ,my friend! Thank you once again....



Happiness is just a Baja memory away...
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Baja Bernie
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[*] posted on 4-21-2007 at 11:36 AM
All of your comments bring a smile to my face.


Thank you!



My smidgen of a claim to fame is that I have had so many really good friends. By Bernie Swaim December 2007
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[*] posted on 4-21-2007 at 01:23 PM


We all have a dose of "Dirty Miguel" in us.:tumble: The older we get, the more of "Miguel" seem's to come forth.:yes:Thanks for the story Bernie. :tumble:
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[*] posted on 4-21-2007 at 01:31 PM


Cypress - does that mean you stop changing your clothing, and having a shower? :lol:
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[*] posted on 4-21-2007 at 01:36 PM


Farasha,:spingrin: Yes, every now and then.:tumble:
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DENNIS
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[*] posted on 4-21-2007 at 01:41 PM


Caltrans could take a lesson from Miguel and stop leaning on the shovel.
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[*] posted on 4-21-2007 at 02:09 PM


Bernie - my favorite one yet.
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Baja Bernie
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[*] posted on 4-21-2007 at 04:20 PM
Pack


I believe that I understand that because for years my handle in Baja was “The Dirt Road Philosopher.”

It is a bit of a secret but once I have finished a book and put that baby to bed I never have gone back to re-read it. This posting of stuff I wrote back in 2000 has forced me to do exactly that and in some ways………..I’ll catch heck for this………the same blocking of hurt and pain that women use to mask the events leading up to the birth of a child is involved in birthing a book. I know, quite well, that it is not the same but it is the only comparison a mere male may make. That is why I decided to edit and publish it myself……………I just could not abide a stranger messing with my baby. I have felt that way about everything I write. It is mine, I created it and that is that.

When I revisited Miguel I almost decided not to include it because of the silly PC that dictates what is acceptable today. My love for the guy and his philosophy is what decided it for me.

I know that, perhaps, I could have come up with a better product, but it was not a product that I wished to create. The only exception, aside from my wife, was when the Roadrunner (my schoolmarm) and I worked so very closely on my last book. He helped make it better and I found a very important friend that I have ‘never’ met.


Farasha, scratch the brute that is man and you will find that most of us love to wander around Baja and not have to worry about some of the most basic hygienic mandates of the opposite sex.

Heck, a few of us don’t even worry about putting the toilet seat down—but only in Baja..

Guess I better quit being honest ‘cause that often comes back to slap one.

[Edited on 4-22-2007 by Baja Bernie]

[Edited on 4-22-2007 by Baja Bernie]




My smidgen of a claim to fame is that I have had so many really good friends. By Bernie Swaim December 2007
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DENNIS
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[*] posted on 4-21-2007 at 04:25 PM


Thanks Bernie....

I just threw away all my toilet paper, deodarant and toothpaste. I am now on the natch, thanks to you.
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Baja Bernie
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[*] posted on 4-21-2007 at 04:29 PM
Okay!


Now that we are forwarned we will all gather up wind of you.



My smidgen of a claim to fame is that I have had so many really good friends. By Bernie Swaim December 2007
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FARASHA
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[*] posted on 4-22-2007 at 09:28 AM


:lol::lol::lol: - another Mystery solved - and will be reported soon in the Baja News.
I read recently ( vandenbergs post), about the stench that had moved from La Paz to Loreto - wondering Why/How . You been around Dennis?? :spingrin: >f<
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thebajarunner
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[*] posted on 4-22-2007 at 11:28 AM
Awwww, c'mon Bern, lighten up...


Quote:
Originally posted by Baja Bernie
I believe that I understand that because for years my handle in Baja was “The Dirt Road Philosopher.”

It is a bit of a secret but once I have finished a book and put that baby to bed I never have gone back to re-read it. This posting of stuff I wrote back in 2000 has forced me to do exactly that and in some ways………..I’ll catch heck for this………the same blocking of hurt and pain that women use to mask the events leading up to the birth of a child is involved in birthing a book. I know, quite well, that it is not the same but it is the only comparison a mere male may make. That is why I decided to edit and publish it myself……………I just could not abide a stranger messing with my baby. I have felt that way about everything I write. It is mine, I created it and that is that.

When I revisited Miguel I almost decided not to include it because of the silly PC that dictates what is acceptable today. My love for the guy and his philosophy is what decided it for me.

I know that, perhaps, I could have come up with a better product, but it was not a product that I wished to create. The only exception, aside from my wife, was when the Roadrunner (my schoolmarm) and I worked so very closely on my last book. He helped make it better and I found a very important friend that I have ‘never’ met.


Farasha, scratch the brute that is man and you will find that most of us love to wander around Baja and not have to worry about some of the most basic hygienic mandates of the opposite sex.

Heck, a few of us don’t even worry about putting the toilet seat down—but only in Baja..

Guess I better quit being honest ‘cause that often comes back to slap one.

[Edited on 4-22-2007 by Baja Bernie]

[Edited on 4-22-2007 by Baja Bernie]


Bernie, I was having a great weekend, mainly ranting and raving around the house, peesing everyone off, waiting for the rain to let up....

Then you go and say nice things about me.
Shucks!!!

I like it better when we are squabbling
:spingrin::spingrin::spingrin:
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