Hope the nomads don't mind me re-posting an earlier trip report, but since Jeans and Martyman expressed an interest in reading it again, here it is:
MEXICALI WILDLIFE
After settling in at the Calexico's Border Motel,
I gave "Tuna-eater" a call to let him know that I
would be in town for the remainder of the day and
night. Just wanted to see if we could get together and
meet head to head at a local restaurant. "Tuna-eater"
had posted on bajanet.com from time to time, and since
I was in his stomping grounds, I wanted to put a face
to the name.
We agreed that he would pick me up at the motel
and we would grab a quick bite at the Burger King and
afterwards have a couple of beers.
I expressed hesitation about the "couple of
beers" part because 1) I was very tired from the 30
hour bus trip. 2) I hadn't drank a beer since the BBBB
last July. 3) I didn't have a slush fund set up for
"wine, women and song". 4) My wardrobe consisted of
clothes designed for the desert and rock hopping; not
bar hopping.
"Hey D'Rat," Tuna quipped, "don't sweat the small
stuff! I got ya covered; the beer is on me!"
Well, after hearing the enthusiasm in Tuna's
voice, I relented and said, "Okay, but just a short
stop and then back to the motel to rest.
Five thirty p.m. arrived and so did Tuna.
Following five minutes of introductions and chit-chat,
I could see that Tuna was a true Amigo de Baja. He
seemed to be a straight shooter, full of enthusiasm,
made quick decisions, wasted no time, and was
determined to show me a good time.
Since Tuna had already eaten supper at home, he
watched patiently as I finished my burger and coke.
With supper out of the way, we headed downtown (I
thought) for the beer and conversation, but Tuna
announced that the beer was better in Mexicali, and
therefore we must make a run across the border.
Again, I made a small protest, saying that I was
really exhausted from the bus trip and an evening of
entertainment in Mexico wasn't necessary. A quick
beer on the U.S. side would suit me just fine.
However, I could see that Tuna came prepared to expose
me to the "Mexicali wildlife", and that meant crossing
over.
"Okay, what the heck," I thought, "A quick run
into Mexicali, a quick beer or two, and then a quick
return to the States.
Off we went! Inside the Custom's building, thru
the clanking, metal revolving gates and into the
streets of Mexicali.
"Oh, a word of caution, Rat," said Tuna, as we
followed a maze of narrow, crowded dark streets. "I
wouldn't advise you to come down to this area
alone...at night!"
"Whoa, wait a minute!", I stammered. "I've got
missions to visit, beaches to stroll, mountains to
climb, miles to go before I sleep, and here you are
telling me that we could meet "Jack, the Ripper" out
here tonight!"
Tuna slowed down to clarify his statement.
"No,no, Rat! It's not that bad! It's just that an
unsuspecting, new-comer to this side of town might be
taken advantage of by some opportunistic, greedy
individual. Therefore, safety in numbers! You are
safe with me because I'm familiar with the ins and
outs here, and I have friends here, too." (Famous last
words!)
Next thing I knew, we were standing across the
street in front of a building with the name "FLAMIGO"
emblazoned above the door in bright, colorful neon
lights.
"This is a cool strip club," Tuna remarked.
"Whoa, hold your horses!", I said. "You didn't
say anything earlier about visiting strip joints.
I've never been to a strip show, and never intended to
visit one." (As I mentioned earlier, I had no slush
funds for such activities).
"Not to worry, Rat," Tuna reassured me. "All we
have to do is buy a beer; the show is free. We'll
just nurse our beers for as long as we can and enjoy
the show. Heh,heh,heh!"
"You mean," I questioned "that we don't have to
pull out dollar bills and slam dunk them down the bras
and g-strings of the dancers...like I've seen on TV?"
"That's right, Rat," Tuna laughed. "We just sit
back and watch the other suckers contribute to the
cause...cause we can't afford it."
Tuna was halfway thru the club's entrance before
I could say "yea or nay", and darned if I was gonna
hang around outside on the street corner while he was
inside taking in the sights and sounds of what
"FLAMIGO" had to offer.
In we went; pass the security guards, pass the
bar, and right up to the elevated dance platform, for
a front row table.
The room was dark, the dance platform well lit, a
cloud of cigarette smoke hung overhead; the music was
loud as it kicked out a throbbing, heavy beat. Your
typical bar scene!
I could barely make out the shapes and forms of
several unescorted women seated at the back tables
against the walls. Tuna said that they would
eventually come over and ask us to buy them a drink;
sure enough they did, and we didn't! Just part of the
bar scene!
We ordered up a couple of "Dos XX's", sat back and
awaited the upcoming presentation.
"And now Caballeros, here to dance for your
pleasure is "Rosita la Bonita"! All heads swiveled
toward the stage, as the volume of the music was
pumped up a few more decibels.
And there we were, sipping our beer, grooving to
the music, when all of a sudden here she
comes...boogity, boogity! Oh...my...goodness! "Don't
look, Ethel!" Uh-oh, too late; we done been moon
beamed! "When the moona hits your eye, like a bigga
pizza pie...dat's Amore!" And so it went, into the
next hour and next two beers.
At $2.50 a beer, we decided to look for a cheaper
watering hole, and Tuna knew just the place. Off we
went again; thru the dingy, dark, side streets of
Mexicali. We ducked into an open doorway and found
ourselves in a small rat's nest of a place. Three or
four "floozies" were seated at tables while several
couples were holding each other up on the dance floor.
Tuna bought us a "caguama" bottle of beer, and we
split the bottle and after scouting the room, we split
the place. Not a place to dwell in too long!
"How about some dancing with the "chicas" at
another club?" suggested Tuna.
At this point, with four or five beers sloshing
under my belt, anything Tuna suggested sounded good to
me, so away we went.
Soon we were in another club and it was definitely
geared for dancing. Women out numbered the men about
5 to 1 and they were all jam-packed against the walls,
and bar. Tuna said that the women expected anywhere
from a quarter to a dollar for a dance. Another new
Baja experience for the "Rat"!
We chose our table, ordered our beer, and casually
observed the activity for a while. By this time I was
about two beers shy of being intoxicated to the point
of "YEEEEE-HAWWW!" I was feeling good and ready to
"shake a leg".
Tuna told me to go for it, and I went for it! I
rose from my chair, teeter-tottered up to the closest
woman waiting at the bar and asked her to dance. The
nice thing about this "dime-a-dance" joint, was that
no one seemed to mind that I was dressed in my tan,
desert hiking pants, with my clod-hopping hiking boots
on my feet. Just plunk down your money and you're off
to the races.
Problem was, no one clued me in as to how the
money changed hands. While "tripping the light fancy"
around the dance floor, I wondered what the dance was
gonna cost me. I didn't know if I was supposed to ask
or if she was supposed to tell.
The music stopped, the dancing stopped, and the
swooning stopped. I escorted the purty, young thang
back to her assigned spot at the bar. She fluttered
her dark lashes, flashed her pearly whites between her
ruby red lips and said, "Gracias". That was it! No
request nor hint for dinero; nada!
I told Tuna about the free dance, and he said
that was a little unusual. I said that I was gonna
dance with Miss Purty again since she never kicked me
in the shins---not even once! Plus, she had all her
teeth showing when she smiled at me.
Second dance and still no hint that she wanted
money for the dance. I doubted that I would get
another "freebie" dance from her but darned if we
weren't out on the floor again. Once more around the
room and once more a "thank-you" and a smile.
The old clock on the wall said it was time to get
outta Dodge so we started dodging our way toward the
door. As I was passing by my ex-dance partner, I
reached out and with a "thank-you" and a smile, I
slipped two bucks into her hand. Shucks, I figured
that Miss Purty had been sitting on that hard stool
all night long just so she could bring home enough
pesos to buy some beans and tortillas for her family.
I would have felt like a petty thief if I didn't
contribute something to the cause!
As we picked our way thru Mexicali, back toward
the border, Tuna pointed out other places I should
visit the next time I was in town. "Oh, and don't
forget...not alone!"
Back thru the clanking, metal revolving gate, back
thru Custom's inspection, back into the USA, and back
to the Border Motel. Made it just in time before the
carriage turned into a pumpkin!
I thanked Tuna for the "Mexicali wildlife" tour,
and thanked him for making the effort to meet with me
as a fellow Amigo de Baja. "It was a pleasure," Tuna
said. "Next time will be even better!" And with that
said, he drove away, and I stepped into my room for a
much needed rest. The next morning I would be going
into Mexicali to catch a bus to Cativina for a hike to
Mission Santa Maria.
__________________________________________________
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I think that was the best "trip" report I've read on this board...truly a classic baja adventure...unplanned, unprepared, lots of surprises, wonder if
you're gonna make it out unscathed, drunker than you'd like to be, adrenalin packed, and a happy ending. thanks for the reprint.
"If it were lush and rich, one could understand the pull, but it is fierce and hostile and sullen.
The stone mountains pile up to the sky and there is little fresh water. But we know we must go back
if we live, and we don't know why." - Steinbeck, Log from the Sea of Cortez
"People don't care how much you know, until they know how much you care." - Theodore Roosevelt
"You can easily judge the character of others by how they treat those who they think can do nothing for them or to them." - Malcolm Forbes
"Let others lead small lives, but not you. Let others argue over small things, but not you. Let others
cry over small hurts, but not you. Let others leave their future in someone else's hands, but not you." - Jim Rohn
"The best way to get the right answer on the internet is not to ask a question; it's to post the wrong answer." - Cunningham's Law
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