Baja Bernie - 10-15-2007 at 07:26 PM
Back at the Pyramid and Lu has curled up with her book and I am just finishing reading a book I brought to give to Keri, “God and Mister Gomez”
hardback, 1st edition, by Jack Smith. Haven’t read it in about twenty years and was amazed at how much I had forgotten. Finished it with a smile on
my face as I thought of how simple things used to be down here in tomorrow land.
Had a kink in my back and was basically stiff all over so I decided to do my evening walk up, down, and around all of the steps that make Keri’s place
just what it is a page out of old Mexico. Understand that is beautiful but all of those stairs are really tough on the calf’s.
Got about two miles in and the wind had really picked up so I decided to relax down by the fountain.
That is where I met Bob—what a guy! Short, balding, with huge blue eyes. Sitting with a glass in hand and a jug at his elbow. Saw me, jumped up and
with a belly laugh invited me to join him in a toddy. Bob, as he said, “not Bobby or Robert, and just forget last names.” A guy so full of energy
that it seemed that he was going a thousand miles an hour without even moving his glass. Hawaiian shirt, denim pants, and deck shoes.
Talk, why damn, he could say a thousand words while I was stuttering to get a couple in edge wise. Seems he owns a used appliance store and does so
well it was like he was printing his own money.
After a few drinks he asked me if I knew of the ‘Restaurant’ called the Jaki Taco in Rosarito. Cut me off before I could tell him that I knew of it
and that he was not pronouncing it right. He went on to tell me how he never minded waiting in line ‘cause they made the best tacos in the world. I
tried to tell him it was Yaqui but he was already off to an entirely different subject.
At first I thought I was getting dizzy over the wine and then it dawned on me that it was this whirling dervish that had me staggering.
After a few oh’s and awes over the pelicans and the dolphins surfing the waves below us he got back on track with his story.
It seems that he and his wife had a few tacos at Yaqui’s, enjoyed themselves and were heading back north to check out the condo he had purchased. The
guy just had to tell me that it was a penthouse (I was a nice guy and never told him it would never be built before he died—hell he was pouring) and
that he had plunked down $300,000 to secure it in his name.
About a block away from Yaqui’s he felt a couple of pieces of taco lodged under his partial. Cruising along the Toll Road he pulled out his ivory
toothpick to dislodge the offending chunk of taco. Nothing worked so he removed his partial and place it in his lap……..Apparently his wife was used
to this behavior and thought nothing of it until they had checked out his condo site and on leaving he noticed his teeth missing. Not being stupid he
realized that the teeth had been brushed off of the seat and into the dust.
About this time I was roaring and laughing so hard that my stomach was doing back flips. He went on to tell me that he didn’t notice that his teeth
were missing until he was in Playa de Tijuana where he stopped to call the resort to see if they could recover his teeth. Nothing doing so he
returned the next morning and began to paw around in the dust in the condo parking lot and finally touched his partial in about two inches of honest
Baja Dust.
Rinses them off and end of that story!
Amazing, I headed back to my bride at about, oh who is counting, about midnight and found the guys still working on a most beautiful home rising up
upon the face of a small cliff. Four or five stories, I am not sure but I do know that the guys were building a ‘septic’ tank that shared a common
wall with the second and third story’s of the house.
What in the world were the guys doing working so far into the night. I had to find out. Wandered up and asked what was going on a one of the guys
said that the gringo senior had forgotten to include a septic in the plans……….so they were trying to hide the problem from the permit guys.
Asked about the fantastic home nest door and they smiled as they showed me the insides…Fantastic! And unbelievable! Four stories with a all glass
crows nest as a crown.
Looking around I asked where was the pilla and the propane tanks—a long pause with hands hiding the mouth and I was told that senior gringo had
forgotten about the water supply and even the need for propane. They said that the propane was stored on the third floor and we agreed that was the
safest place because if it blew up it would not disturb the folks in the bedrooms on the second floor
We exchanged comments about the nuevo gringo’s and said good night.
The next morning as we were about to leave the maestro on the first home approached and asked me where were the pipes to the sewer, this as his guys
were busily tearing up the street I just didn’t have the guts to tell him that the sewer lines were a good 100 yards on the other side of the hotel
complex.
So my friends that is the end of this trip report and I am sure that you now realize that if you look you will find so many wonderful things in our
Baja.
Fin!
Paulina - 10-15-2007 at 08:26 PM
"I am sure that you now realize that if you look you will find so many wonderful things in our Baja."
Bernie,
Nice ending to your trip report. You never know what wonderful things you can find down there, even a set of pearly white choppers in the dust! It's
almost too bad he was able to go back and recovered them. Think of the stories that could have been told by the lucky person who chanced to look down
to see them grinning up at them between their feet!
Saludos!
P<*)))><
DENNIS - 10-15-2007 at 08:30 PM
OK.....Can we hijack this thread now?
Gnome-ad - 10-16-2007 at 01:30 PM
Bernie ~
Great report ... the sewer line reminds me of our first building here. We arrived to find our builder had built the bodega of our dreams, complete
with "functional" bathroom. Having just finisihed a drive from Loreto to Todos Santos we were very ready for the new bathroom.
"Only number one!" he told us earnestly. If we needed to go numero dos we needed to use the tarpaper outhouse in the middle of the property. No
problema, but we were curious why of course. I had mentioned that theplans we discussed had never mentioned sewer excavation, etc. Amir assured me
that he had specified "functional" bathroom.
Long story short, we did get hooked up a few days later, but just another one of those lessons about Baja, never assume your toilet is going to be
functional in the way you migh assume just because you asked that it be so. Things just translate differently sometimes.
The story about the teeth was great, but I'm with Paulina - someone else finding those teeth?! 
Yes Paulina
Baja Bernie - 10-16-2007 at 02:43 PM
has a certain flair and she should be writing more because she had a bunch to contribute.............I really enjoyed her visuals regarding the
shooting star in response to my sounds of Baja thing.
Gnome-ad - 10-16-2007 at 04:40 PM
Me, too, Bernie. Her son sounded like a sweet little kid. Took me back to camping trips with my two.
Paulina - 10-16-2007 at 08:56 PM
Thank you Bernie and Gnome-ad, your kind words are appreciated. I have stories in my head, just not sure how to get them out or where to begin. It
usually takes someone to say something that sparks a memory, then the words come out. Thank you Bernie for sparking the shooting star story out of me.
I may copy it to my son who is now too big to share the same lounge chair with his mother...
P<*)))><
Pauline
Baja Bernie - 10-16-2007 at 09:05 PM
But never to big to share a story such as that with his mom.
docsmom - 10-16-2007 at 09:39 PM
Bernie,
Thanks so much, AGAIN! You have the ability to weave beautiful pictures with your words. When I read your words I can feel, see and smell your
experiences. I was right there with you quietly grinning as the big man talked. And I even think I got a buzz from the wine! And smell, septic tank
wall adjoining the house walls? HILARIOUS!!!!!!!! Good job word man!
On a totally different topic, I love that you re-read God & Mr. Gomez. I originally read the story in a Readers Digest Condensed Book (and
probably read it 5 times in 10 years as a young person). I want to read the story again and in it's full form. When I look on Amazon there are
several different versions for sale. Do you know when the original publish date was? I want the original unabridged version. Can you shed any light
on when the original book was published?
Thanks Big Bern for all your delightful posts. I never have time to read them during the week but I love knowing they're there for weekend
consumption. It's the closest thing to being there. Don't stop!!!!
Docsmom.
docsmom
Baja Bernie - 10-17-2007 at 05:17 PM
Try this link for God and Mr. Gomez.......you want a hardcover first edition, copyright 1974 ISBN # 0-88349-039-0
http://www.abebooks.com/
They run from $1.00 plus shipping and up but not too high. I have bought several as gifts lately.
docsmom - 10-17-2007 at 08:28 PM
thanks Bernie!
Eli - 10-18-2007 at 06:41 AM
Well Bernie, by sharing your vision You have generated another great thread here, thanks. Wonder how you feel about the fact that with the exception
of one tiny attempt at a hijack, all the responses here have been by women?
Sara
Baja Bernie - 10-18-2007 at 09:32 AM
I have noticed that and it is rewarding because for far too long women have basically been lurkers.
Glad to see them and they certainly have basically positive things to contribute.
I have almost always been very comfortable around women and as JR would have said, They be human and to him that meant concerned folks who cared for
others.
So, in a nut shell, I believe that it is wonderful!
hunter47 - 10-18-2007 at 07:23 PM
Baja Bernie -
Nice post! Sounds familiar!
Su amigo,
Ricardo
P.S. Thanks for the tip on searchin the site
hunter 47
Baja Bernie - 10-18-2007 at 07:43 PM
Denada