BajaNomad - Help: Wife afraid of Baja

Help: Wife afraid of Baja

ears - 5-21-2008 at 11:43 AM

I'm trying to plan a trip down Baja with my two sons (ages 7 and 4)to Scorpion Bay where I will meet a group of other families. She is deadly afraid that the drive is too dangerous and risky, the road is often shut down, and that the truck (2007 Pathfinder) will breakdown. Honest opinions needed to put her at ease (or honest replies that it could be to dangerous for children.)

woody with a view - 5-21-2008 at 11:50 AM

tell her you'll stay in the middle of the pack so as not to get seperated from the herd, thus becoming an easy target

. there will be hundreds (if not more) of other people there when you arrive who all overcame her exact emotions.

Woooosh - 5-21-2008 at 11:55 AM

As long as you're the type of man that is willing and able to physically protect his family and personal belongings- go for it. If you can't honestly see yourself getting through a tough situation on the road- head somewhere else.

With several police Chiefs heading to the USA for protection and the Mexican Army taking control of some towns on the mainland, yor wife is justly concerned. Concerned should mean paralyzed with fear though. JMHO

Hook - 5-21-2008 at 12:18 PM

You're driving an EXTREMELY reliable car.

You're going to a location that will be EXTREMELY well attended by gringos, i.e., safe.

As long as you arent driving at night through the TJ-San Quintin area, you probably have better odds than some places in the LA Basin.

IF it were me, I'd stick with the toll road. Too much military presence for much to happen.

FDT, does the military have a big presence on the free road? BTW, when you recommend the free road, I assume you are recommending the toll road at some point, correct?

Diver - 5-21-2008 at 12:26 PM

GET A NEW WIFE ! :lol:

We spent 3 months last year travelling Baja with our then 6 and 12 year olds.
Both kids have been going to Baja since they were infants.
We are planning to be there again soon.

If TJ scares her (it does my wife), cross at Tecate. It is a MUCH more comfy intro to Baja.
Travel during the day and plan your stops accordingly.
Have you done this before ??

[Edited on 5-21-2008 by Diver]

woody with a view - 5-21-2008 at 12:27 PM

Quote:

FDT, does the military have a big presence on the free road? BTW, when you recommend the free road, I assume you are recommending the toll road at some point, correct?

if i remember right (50/50) his route drops you at the north end of rosarito by the pemex plant.

last saturday night (7pm) our friends offered a night at their place near fox studios. we crossed the border about 10.15 and got a flat near trumps place. the pizza cutter spare was half inflated so we proceeded to the turnoff with the OXXO. they didn't have fix a flat (for the compressed air) but a guy in the store offered his spare (same lug pattern, he actually removed it) and said we could drop it off at the store when we came north and he'd reteive it from them. well a guy working in his soon-to-open bakery next door to the OXXO came to the rescue with a large compressor. neither guy would take a dime.

we can't wait to try the guys bakery next time thru and pump it mercilessly.

so much for "don't drive at night"...

Bajagypsy - 5-21-2008 at 12:29 PM

As a wife and mother of 4, I have never felt afraid and we drive from Canada to our place in Baja. Our four kids have done the drive twice, and my husband and I have done it 9+ times.

The things your children will learn, and the experience they will gain far out ways any risk either real or imagined.

TecateRay - 5-21-2008 at 12:30 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by ears
I'm trying to plan a trip down Baja with my two sons (ages 7 and 4)to Scorpion Bay where I will meet a group of other families. She is deadly afraid that the drive is too dangerous and risky, the road is often shut down, and that the truck (2007 Pathfinder) will breakdown. Honest opinions needed to put her at ease (or honest replies that it could be to dangerous for children.)

Once you get past TJ/Rosarita you are past most of the danger noted in recent news articles. The people further south are starving for tourists and working really hard to make things safe. Here are my recommendations to a safe and reduced worry for the wife trip.
1. Avoid TJ completely - cross in Tecate and head to Ensenada
2. Travel only in the daylight and plan to stop by 5 PM or so, your kids will appreciate the break anyway.
3. Get reservations at a decent hotel along the hiway on your way down and back. There are good hotels along the way in San Quintin, El Rosario, Guerrero Negro, San Ignacio, Loreto, etc.
4. Take the "long way" - go around through Insurgentes. It is paved all the way with only 20 miles or less of dirt road. That should help allay her fears of the car breaking down in the middle of nowhere.

Good luck! Have her call me if she needs more convincing. I haven't been to Tecate since last Friday, but things seemed pretty calm there. I was in San Juanico (Scorpion Bay) in November, so the road conditions have probably improved since they were paving between there and La Purisima.

Taco de Baja - 5-21-2008 at 12:42 PM

If you get to go, you better not pass through Los Angeles on your way down....It's a scary, dangerous, place.

http://www.latimes.com/news/local/crime/homicidemap/?source=local_news

To reassure her, try to caravan in a group, and have 2-way radios; safer that way, and if someone does break down or get a flat, there are more helpers and options.

Baja is a great place for kids, do not deny them the opportunity; some of my earliest and fondest memories are of camping, playing, exploring, rock scrambling, fire-crackers, camp-fires, hiking, swimming.... in the wilds of Baja. :yes:

[Edited on 5-21-2008 by Taco de Baja]

Cypress - 5-21-2008 at 12:55 PM

ears, Do it! Your family will have the adventure of a lifetime.

Pay no attention to the nay-sayers.

Once you get past the border(traffic etc.) it's smooth sailing. :bounce:

The Sculpin - 5-21-2008 at 12:57 PM

Your wife has reason for concern, but for all the wrong reasons. Tell her that Hwy 1 is really no different than sections of 395, or alot of the roads out in the 4 corners area. Yes there are trucks and stuff, but if you go slow and are cautious, all should be fine. Staying in the middle of the pack is a good idea. Offer to bring several walkie-talkies so you can communicate with each other during the caravan. Make sure you bring all the tools and extra car parts you need to make her comfortable. Hopefully you know what to do with them! Make sure both your cell phones work in baja. Offer to get the air-evac insurance - it's not that much. Make reservations at the hotels you're going to stay at - there and back. I suggest Don Eddies in San Quintin, and the Serenidad in Muluge. Using those two, you'll have 2 easy days and one long one. Take the south road - it's much easier on the psyche than the east or north. Don't drive at night (no brainer unless you're a raving lunatic like me!). Let the kids do all the talking at the checkpoints - the boysoldiers love that. Keep a baseball bat handy along side the driver's seat, and have a large dog in the way back. All this should pacify your wife, and you'll probably not need any of it.

Here's what she should be worried about.

Take plenty of water with you. Bring lots of sunscreen and hats for the kiddies. Bring long sleeve t-shirts and pajama pants for sunburns - a sweatshirt doesn't hurt either. Bring a rake becuase there's lots of pokey thinks on the ground. Outdoor carpet too.Watch for scorpions (duh) and sting rays - bring water shoes. Bring lots of shade - there are no trees in San Juanico. Bring a table and a windscreen. Lots of flashlights. Bring a fairly complete medical kit - lava rocks are really sharp (you should see my legs and arms!). Bring a shovel, strong rope and some wood planks - because when you go to the estuary you're probably going to get stuck - probably real good - I mean campfire good! Bring an extra spare tire. Bring sandbags so you can anchor your camp - it gets really windy at sunset. Bring firewood. Bring a really thick longboard.

If all this fails, just drug her and throw her in the car. By the time you get there, she'll wonder what she was worried about (of course she'll never speak to you again - more time to surf!!).

Honestly, Scorpion Bay is not the adventure it used to be. It's a pretty cush place now, and has always been a great place to take kids. If your wife is the nervous nelly type that can't bear the thought of not having her kids in plain sight, either don't go, or paddle up to 5th or 6th and stay there the whole day.

Good luck!

fdt - 5-21-2008 at 12:58 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Hook

FDT, does the military have a big presence on the free road? BTW, when you recommend the free road, I assume you are recommending the toll road at some point, correct?

No military at al on free road and that would be all the way to Ensenada exept for Popotla(Fox). When I say take the free road I am refering to the Tijuana - Rosarito portion and even up to La Mision.

cabobaja - 5-21-2008 at 01:00 PM

Have been in San Diego assisting my elderly parents. My wife and 5 & 10 year old boys fly in first week of June from Los Cabos. After a week of my wife shopping, we all drive back to Elias Calles.

We drive to San Diego at least once a year. The road is good, just plan your trip and do not drive at night. Your biggest worry should be keeping your kids from getting too bored on the road. DVD player is the best. Plenty of kiddie things to munch on.

Have a great trip. Once you get back home, your wife will probably want to plan the next trip to Baja.

wilderone - 5-21-2008 at 01:28 PM

You must convince her that you know how, and will take care of, any possible glitch. Show her the tire changing tools and all the spare parts; show her the page of emergency phone numbers you have. Convince her you will be taking half the responsibility of the childrens' welfare. (Some dads think that's mom's job, and mom has no fun on her vacation). Do you have toys, games, music, cameras, snacks, surprises for the kids? You will need to stop often for their comfort, but stopping in a small town to buy a soda with pesos would be fun for them. Tell her you know about all the hazards, and how to avoid them. If you need a list of the hazards and how to avoid them - let us know - we will provide them. For instance, drive slowly through any town - know what the pedestrian crossing, slow, stop, school, town near, signs mean in Spanish.
What she is afraid of is the unknown. So talk with her and ask what she is afraid of, and have a solution to the "worst case scenario". The roads are not shut down - just a fact. Bring coolant, oil, all the usual - jumper cables, good spare. Maybe devise some way of staying in contact with your friends as you're traveling, or have her go with them, and you take the kids. Keep the merlot handy.

The Sclupin is right...

Juan del Rio - 5-21-2008 at 01:54 PM

...lots of kids (dogs too!) and great families in the summer...bring 'em, they have a ball, make new, "Baja Buddies" and you and your wife will have a great adventure/vacation with the kids!

P1060944X.JPG - 20kB

Kinda of a typical Summer day at the beach near Second

Juan del Rio - 5-21-2008 at 01:55 PM

P1060176X.JPG - 20kB

Capt. George - 5-21-2008 at 02:05 PM

Drive in the daylight...if your wife is concerned, she'll be more concerned at night...Good idea, cross at Tecate.

Wish I had found Baja before my kids were fully grown...what an adventure, your kids (and wife) will remember it for all time.

Going with other explorers? Any of them made this trip before? Even better.

Go for it ears, the chances of regretting it are absolutely minimal, just use your head as you would for any other long range trip, States or Mexico!

Bien Viaje amigo (if you have even a small grasp of Espanol, use it)

Buenos suertes cap'n g

lingililingili - 5-21-2008 at 02:08 PM

I have not read from anyone that you should respect your wife's feelings.

We who live here and have travelled here know it is a wonderful and safe place, but she does not. There has been alot of bad press of late. If she feels strongly about not coming, I say don't.

That's my two cents worth!

Capt. George - 5-21-2008 at 02:19 PM

just hit her on the head with a club, and go for it....

I seen that on TV once!

oldlady - 5-21-2008 at 02:22 PM

lingilingili makes a very good point!

It is difficult in this medium for us to understand how concerned she is, but your phrase, "deadly afraid" raises an eyebrow. It is her vacation too, and won't be much fun for her if she is highly worried all the time, warranted or not. (and if she's like me she'll make it not very fun for YOU!)

Baja is a wonderful, magical place. It is beautiful and as safe as any "vacation" area. Besides the supplies the key message is not to travel at night, but then there are lots of places in the US where I would not travel at night.

Capt. George - 5-21-2008 at 02:26 PM

just keep the club with you on your trip...

for the banditos and if your wife should wake up!

bancoduo - 5-21-2008 at 02:35 PM

Put a paper bag over her head. It worked for my crazy aunt.

Osprey - 5-21-2008 at 02:42 PM

I've had some harrowing trips. When I reached a likely place to stay I always made sure we had first class accomodations because I needed a safe place to unwind.

Digs.jpg - 44kB

Osprey - 5-21-2008 at 02:44 PM

You can't imagine what I've been through on the way down. Sometimes they would even give me tope duty.

Tope.jpg - 23kB

mtgoat666 - 5-21-2008 at 02:48 PM

Quote:

The road is rarely shut down, maybe once or twice in many, many years after a hurricane or something like a strike protest. Shutdowns no more frequent than roads in the US.

Re driving conditions, the road is no more dangerous than rural 2-lane roads in the US. Pay attention and you will be safe, and drive in daylight so you can see what's ahead, and drive at a sane speed. Shoulder widths are less than you are acustomed to, so need to pay attention. At nite your greatest risk is hitting livestock or coming upon a curve traveling too fast because of limited visibility -- so for this reason you should not drive at nite.

Re banditos, very safe driving in day time, very rarely dangerous to drive at nite (but you won't be driving at nite simply for visibility issues).

A 2007 model car will break down? Can't imagine anything more reliable than a late model car -- but here is your excuse to buy a new car, if you want such an excuse :lol:

Capt. George - 5-21-2008 at 02:49 PM

I had to do "dopey doody"..Osprey, think you had it rough?

BMG - 5-21-2008 at 03:03 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Osprey
You can't imagine what I've been through on the way down. Sometimes they would even give me tope duty.

At first glance I thought those were skid marks leading up to your human tope. On closer inspection I see that the marks are from someone burning rubber during acceleration.

Tell your wife.....

Pompano - 5-21-2008 at 03:52 PM

Adventure/Life? is not for riding shetlands...get a spirited stallion.

Ride, boldy, Ride!, the Shade replied, if you search for El Dorado...

Do a bunch of searching here and find out lots of facts...

..and lastly...Baja Dress Code is important.

[Edited on 5-21-2008 by Pompano]

-.jpg - 42kB

RockhouseTom - 5-21-2008 at 06:19 PM

Only three very important saftey rules:

1) Do not drive at night.

2) Do Not Drive At Night.

3) DO NOT DRIVE AT NIGHT!

Go and enjoy. I have an Autistic 13 year old son and Baja is his paridise. Baja provides life lessons for all the kids I have been envolved with there. My family has seen the good and the bad in Baja and there is no place we rather go. Use common sense and have Fun! Baja is a beautiful place, but the people you meet make it special.

bajalera - 5-21-2008 at 06:53 PM

Get her some maps and appoint her Navigator, wkth the responsibility of keeping track of where you are.

Bring a good brand of lemon drops.

The Gull - 5-21-2008 at 07:02 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Woooosh
As long as you're the type of man that is willing and able to physically protect his family and personal belongings- go for it. If you can't honestly see yourself getting through a tough situation on the road- head somewhere else.

With several police Chiefs heading to the USA for protection and the Mexican Army taking control of some towns on the mainland, yor wife is justly concerned. Concerned should mean paralyzed with fear though. JMHO

For the trip, the greatest danger is from those who tell you Baja is too dangerous especially around Rosarito Beach. It is extremely dangerous to pay attention to these people because they live in Playas de Rosarito. That is known as Baja-hypocrisy can lead to a shortened life span.

If she believes she is in mortal danger - all of you stay home or she stays home.

DENNIS - 5-21-2008 at 07:27 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by The Gull
For the trip, the greatest danger is from those who tell you Baja is too dangerous especially around Rosarito Beach. It is extremely dangerous to pay attention to these people because they live in Playas de Rosarito. That is known as Baja-hypocrisy can lead to a shortened life span.

If you comprehend any part of the above, your level of understanding will handle anything Baja throws at you.

[Edited on 5-22-2008 by DENNIS]

Aventurera - 5-21-2008 at 07:41 PM

I'm a fairly youngish woman and I've driven down alone (through Tijuana even) as recently as March with no problems and no scary moments whatsoever. However, I also spent a summer in Colombia in '99 when things were quite dangerous for Americans there and in Sinaloa last month when things got crazy, so I'm not one to relate well to the less adventurous.

Honestly, though, it's just not a scary place for Americans. Things seem much scarier reading the news sitting on this side of the border about all the goings-on down there than they do when one is actually there. Being there, it's easy to forget that all the border violence is happening. Life goes on quite peacefully...as long as you're not in the drug trade, I suppose.

[Edited on 5-22-2008 by Aventurera]

oxxo - 5-21-2008 at 07:48 PM

EARS, just have your wife PM one of the women who have responded to this thread, there are some good ones. They can give your wife the women's perspective rather than the macho approach by us guys.

My wife and I drive the Tecate/Los Cabos route 4 roundtrips a year. We don't caravan, we go by ourselves. Wife is completely comfortable and does a lot of the driving. We are doing it again in two weeks. She can't wait to get started.

Just follow the advice in the posts above.

Suerte

DENNIS - 5-21-2008 at 08:09 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Aventurera
Life goes on quite peacefully...as long as you're not in the drug trade, I suppose.

There are a lot of peaceful, drug-free people who will disagree with your appraisel. Since there are no designated danger zones, the whole place reeks with unseen danger for everybody. Not just tourists, everybody. And, pleeeeze, those inclined to compare the conditions with those in the US.....save it. That is not the point.

rts551 - 5-21-2008 at 08:45 PM

Dennis

This means you have first hand knowledge of the "whole place"?

And Plezzzzzze why don't you just go back north!

Quote:

Originally posted by DENNIS

Quote:

Originally posted by Aventurera
Life goes on quite peacefully...as long as you're not in the drug trade, I suppose.

DENNIS - 5-21-2008 at 08:49 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by rts551

And Plezzzzzze why don't you just go back north!

Yeah...I'll do that when I get around to it. In the meantime, why don't you mordame....

Aventurera - 5-21-2008 at 09:11 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by DENNIS

why don't you mordame....

Umm, grammar police: muérdeme :!:

Going onto a grammar tangent, "por qué no me muerdes" would be the proper translation, but it doesn't sound very colloquial and "me muerdes" wouldn't fit well into the English grammatical structure. So I think it would have to be "why don't you morderme..." :?:

Spanglish is rather tricky!

...

[Edited on 5-22-2008 by Aventurera]

Don't drive at night?

John M - 5-21-2008 at 09:21 PM

I see this "warning" several times in this reply to your question.

It seems to convey a sense of danger from who knows what? - lurcking in the shadows and ready to pounce on the unknowing Americans traveling Highway 1 at night.

It certainly is my recollection that in years past this advice had nothing to do with banditos but everything to do with the fact that almost all of Baja is "open range" cattle country. And that the danger at night is from cattle wandering onto the highway at the most inopportune times -
no shoulder on the road, narrow roadways, etc.

No matter the reason - driving at night is dangerous. But let's not get overly paranoid with this "bad guy" hysteria that permeates the news lately.

My wife and young kids regularly drove the roads to Ensenada with never an issue of any kind. That was a few years ago but we'd do it again today as well.

We all long for the "good ol' days" whether we live in California, Baja California, or Oregon. Just keep in mind that tomorrow will be the "good ol' days" twenty years from now!

John M

Sharksbaja - 5-21-2008 at 09:38 PM

Something reeks alright but it is not Baja.

garyr - 5-21-2008 at 10:26 PM

Ears

When do you plan to go?

Gary

Loudest Noise, least helpful

The Gull - 5-22-2008 at 07:06 AM

Doncha just love it when the dudes who live in the Rosarito-Ensenada area, who have nothing else to do to but foul up this board with anti-Baja material, tell a relatively newbie not to go to Baja? Classic?

I was hammered by those types when I posted that this is a good time to travel to Baja - Far fewer visitors, cheap car washes, cheaper drinks, lower restaurant prices and $2.60/gallon gas. Hey, I enjoy the lower activity level of the visitors, but for the sake of the Mexican economy, enough is enough.

The druggies killing each other and the sensationalizing American press with their phobia of the brown hoards coming over the border unchecked, will always cause enough negative vibes for most Americans to steer clear. It is schoolyard pile-ing-on by having ex-pats and financial failure escapees from America post unsupportable opinions degrading Baja.

EARS - respect your wife's concerns, try another year. Northern Baja is safer than in the past two years, but that may not matter to her. I frequently have folks from the US to visit. On different occasions over the last 10 years, I have had three different buddies who brought their wives down for a weekend to visit. Each of those wives were terrified of Mexico (the people down here are brown and speak another language), everywhere these women went they had a death grip on their purse (that attracts attention), and complained about men staring at them (their looks alone were defense against rape). They shoved their food around the plate as if looking for moving objects. One woman tried to shower with bottled water, while another didn't shower for two days (helped with the anti-rape fear). At a military stop, one woman decided to scream that she was going to die and got hysterical in the car when the soldier with the rifle waved us on - she saw "the look in his eyes" as he held the gun at her. Later, one got freaked out by the US customs officer asking questions and caused the car to go to secondary.

These are hard learned lessons which don't need repeating.

[Edited on 5-22-2008 by The Gull]

In the end, you and your wife will make the decision...that is best for you.

Pompano - 5-22-2008 at 07:41 AM

A lot of what we can do on this board is to present our views and personal experiences for your inspection and judgement.

Here's one that may..or may not..add to your decision-making.

Yesterday I met a kayaker in front of my waterfront home in Coyote Bay. (A few miles south of Mulege, Baja California Sur. 650 miles south of the San Diego/Tijuana border.)

This kayaker had just finished a 7-week solo trip from San Felipe to Coyote.

Nobody else with this long-distance paddler...completely alone.

No problems..no crime...no shootings...no nada. Just the peaceful and unbelievably scenic journey along the Baja coast for hundreds of miles. I will soon post a thread about her trip.

This kayaker has also driven the entire length of the Baja Road several times.

I have known this adventurer for many years. Her name is Leslie, she's 55, and about as big as my left leg.

She has good judgement and a generous supply of self-reliance ..which she uses to determine how and where she travels.

woody with a view - 5-22-2008 at 08:59 AM

Quote:

EARS - respect your wife's concerns, try another year. Northern Baja is safer than in the past two years, but that may not matter to her. I frequently have folks from the US to visit. On different occasions over the last 10 years, I have had three different buddies who brought their wives down for a weekend to visit. Each of those wives were terrified of Mexico (the people down here are brown and speak another language), everywhere these women went they had a death grip on their purse (that attracts attention), and complained about men staring at them (their looks alone were defense against rape). They shoved their food around the plate as if looking for moving objects. One woman tried to shower with bottled water, while another didn't shower for two days (helped with the anti-rape fear). At a military stop, one woman decided to scream that she was going to die and got hysterical in the car when the soldier with the rifle waved us on - she saw "the look in his eyes" as he held the gun at her. Later, one got freaked out by the US customs officer asking questions and caused the car to go to secondary.

Gull, yer killing me!!!!!
:lol:

Debra - 5-22-2008 at 09:20 AM

Tell your wife I have been driving down for 11yrs. mostly alone with my young son (since he was 4) Not a problem, except car trouble........Word got out on this board (thanks David K.) had I had people from up and down Baja offering to come bail my butt out, many I had never met in person before, just on this and the Amigos board.

Only one problem I see happening..........the dreaded BAJA FEVER! Your kids will catch it and won't want to leave, and will nag until you agree to bring them back :lol:

Paulina - 5-22-2008 at 09:45 AM

Hi Deb, Glad you took a break from shoveling beach sand to check in.

There are a few of us baja women on this board who have traveled alone for years. I believe that the success of our journeys can be attributed to our attitudes/personalities.

Someone with the fears that "Ears" wife is experiencing can be so strong that it could have the effect of making a wonderful, problem free trip a nightmare, just from the worry alone that trouble is lying around every corner.

If something did go wrong, it would only increase the level of terror in her mind. I don't think Ears would ever hear the end of "I told you so" if he lived long enough.

I've traveled with "someone" who disliked baja and it made everyone's life miserable. Why ruin a trip like that?

I'm thinking seperate vacations! Too bad his wife can't fly in and out, avoiding the drive, but the place they are headed for doesn't quite work for that.

Instead of throwing her in the deep end of baja, maybe teach her to swim in the shallow end first. Build her confidence in the place and the people and hopefully she'll come around.

P<*)))><

stimbo - 5-22-2008 at 09:47 AM

Hey Ears -- You've read a diversity of opinion on the pros and cons of visiting Baja. The bottom line is that Mexico isn't for everyone. If your wife is "riding the fence," then some more persuasion is in order. I love the place and will continue to visit and explore the peninsula, in spite of the negative press. I fished there as a kid with my father in the "glory days" of saltwater angling. And now, I share the place with my family; a wife that enjoys primitive camping and two teenagers that love kayaking, surfing, and hanging out on beaches. We spent a few days at Scorpian Bay in April. Frankly, it didn't even "feel" like Mexico. There are lots of gringos, which may or may not be a good thing.... however, the attraction is the surf and sand.

Getting there is the "battle." If traveling down the peninsula is the issue, have you considered flying to Loreto or La Paz? You could rent a car or have your friends meet you at the airport. From the border, on your own, plan on 3 days to get to your destination. From either airport, a half-day drive max will suffice. Easy driving as well.

Again, Mexico isn't for everyone. Travel in Baja requires planning with certain expectations. You cannot mindlessly hop into a truck for a quick vacation (which obviously is why you have consulted this website). Baja is a foreign country (a Third World nation), for some it is bleak, desolate, and destitute, the roads are narrow and require vigilant and attentive driving, they don't speak English... I could go on "ad naseum." Be prepared. Listen to your wife, she has legitimate concerns. For myself, I enjoy the culture and the people. If you should breakdown, someone will stop and drop everything they are doing in order to help you. The Mexicans are warm, accommodating, and resourceful. And the landscape is stunning.... well worth the work involved to get there.

As I write this, a spring storm has rolled in. It is snowing outside! Just two days ago it was in the 80's! Now I pine for the beaches of Mexico.....

And finally, here is a photo of Scorpian Bay. Good luck with your decision.

Scorpian_001.jpg - 33kB

Osprey - 5-22-2008 at 09:56 AM

Yesterday my wife and a lady friend, in my 1990 Olds 4 dr sedan drove the 60 miles south of here to Cabo San Lucas to shop and do some banking. She carries a cell phone and I try to stay around the house in case there is trouble on the road. No calls, she got home at 5:30. She did have trouble on the road. In the heart of San Lucas but not on a paved street she went over a high spot in a construction zone, got high-centered and could not move the car. Before she could ask for help some young men walking down the dirt street came to her aid -- one older guy drove while the others lifted the car off the high spot, moved to a place where she could get traction again. They wouldn't take her money, but smiled politely when she thanked them. Maybe it's a case of Bad Roads in Bad Places WITH Good People.

[Edited on 5-22-2008 by Osprey]

bajaboolie - 5-22-2008 at 12:43 PM

Ears, I guess I want to reiterate what some of the others have said and offer my own experience. If she truly is "deathly afraid", then it wouldn't be worth her going through that experience. But if she's afraid but open to encouragement, by all means show her all the precautions you plan on taking...people have offered some great advice on precautions. I would include one other thing. I put an "in case of emergency" family contact person's phone number in the glove box (in spanish). A bit morbid, yes, but if we get in an accident I'd want my family in San Diego to know as soon as possible.

I am a wife and mom, and we have been bringing our 6 year old to Baja yearly since she was 2. My parents brought me down to Coyote Bay at least annually since I was 3. I cannot imagine my life without our Baja trips. But even so, every year I get very nervous about the drive down beause of the posts of the violence in Northern Baja, as well as the sometimes shoulderless roads, trucks and winding roads (or straight and immensely boring). Despite my fears, I work it out because I realize the chances of anything happening is slim, and the reward of being in Baja is immense. Please, if she wants to U2U me she is more than welcome. I'm open to talking it through!

Cypress - 5-22-2008 at 01:02 PM

Ears, Sounds to me like your wife needs a good "Come to Jesus talk".

Good luck!

Wife afraid of Baja:Part II

ears - 5-22-2008 at 02:07 PM

My wife felt I was not specific enough about my intinerary for my trip and that I need to expand on it so people can offer more insightful advice. The trip is in two parts. The first part my 7 years old son and I will drive the length of Baja to Cabo from Los Angeles. My plan is to take three nights stopping at La Pinta's in San Quitin/Catavina (1st night), Mulege/Loreto(2nd night), and La Paz the third night. The next day I would meet my wife and 4 year old son at the airport in Cabo and we would stay in our time share near San Jose for 10 days. She would then leave to go home and back to work, a friend of mine would fly into Cabo, and the four of us (my friend, 7 and 4 year old sons, and myself) would drive together to Scorpion Bay. We sould spend 1 night in La PAz again, then drive to SB where I would meet up with another friend and 6 other families all with kids. We would be in SB for a week and then caravan back home to LA together. I would be driving a 2007 Pathfinder and have driven to Cabo once before, Loreto twice, and Mulege once, Punta Abreojos, as well as, numerous surf trips in N. Baja. She is serioulsy worried that the trip is too long for a 7 year old both ways and that if it was in the US that would be one thing, but being in Mexico is another and she is worried about the children's safety (esp. going solo on the way down to Cabo). She is also worried about road conditions and planning a trip where we have to meet at the airport in four days. Honest opinions would be appreciated, esp. from families and people with kids

BRO

woody with a view - 5-22-2008 at 02:14 PM

put your foot down.....the sun might not come up tomorrow, but i'm still setting my alarm clock just in case.... :?:

woody with a view - 5-22-2008 at 02:28 PM

or push on another 30-35 minutes to the baja cactus in el rosario. hands down the best value for the money. :!:

Paulina - 5-22-2008 at 02:32 PM

Part Dos sheds a whole new light on the subject. The kids will be fine. There's so much to look at out the side windows. She can u2u me for tons more stuff about traveling in baja with kids if she'd like. I traveled alone with my kids in Baja from the beginning.

You could also do a search for traveling with kids. Use the Google option at the bottom, click on the Bajanomad.com. I know there are quite a few posts on this board on that subject.

It would be a good idea to put emergency contact info. in your vehicle just in case. My fear was that we'd be in an accident and I'd not be able to care for my kids. Having that info. handy will help ease that concern.

P.

Honestly?

Sharksbaja - 5-22-2008 at 02:41 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by ears
My wife felt I was not specific enough about my intinerary for my trip and that I need to expand on it so people can offer more insightful advice. We sould spend 1 night in La PAz again, then drive to SB where I would meet up with another friend and 6 other families all with kids. Honest opinions would be appreciated, esp. from families and people with kids

Ok. Honestly speaking, we had more trouble at Loreto/LA/Portland airports than any of many trips up and down Baja.
When I opted to meet my son and wife there one time in Loreto it had already been a horrible trip for them due to airport paranoia and security after 9-11.

Driving down has always been our preferred and rewarding transportation method. Our children love it down there and we as a family have never had any trouble rather we've appreciated the hospitality, adventure and warmth of Mexico.

Your wife sounds like a control freak. Folks like that should stick to travel itineraries with groups of same minded people.
I'm not trying to dissuade you or her as many travelers find these types of visits safe, fun and secure.

Each to their own. From here it looks like you, the adventurous type, and your wife, the fretting type have a problem with what's in the best interest of jr. Hey that's the way it should be. Kids welfare always comes first.

With that said, you and you significant other must come to some reasonable solution that alleviates her fears yet allows you and your son to enjoy a special vacation.

Understand that while there is much hyperbole about Baja' troubles and worries, we can't be all wrong. I never have fear following me around down there. That would not be fun at all. I'd do what others here have donbe if I felt scared down in Baja, and that is stay away.

My recommendation for you is this: Remind your wife how comfortable and confident you are with the trip. Afterall, you've done it numerous times. Insist that she NOT come if she carries bad vibes down there or can't be comfrotable because of some unbeknownst(sp?) fear or problem.

Most of all though, down ruin yer marriage over it! :lol:

If you go however be prepared for the time of your child's life. :yes:

Be smart, you sound wise, you just obviously love your wife a bunch or we wouldn't have got this far in the first place.! :bounce:

Good luck amigo, Corky

edit for sp

[Edited on 5-22-2008 by Sharksbaja]

The Gull - 5-22-2008 at 03:16 PM

You have a time share near San Jose and you question the risks of Baja?

Seems a bit out of place. Did you buy it more than eight years ago, before being married?

I have changed my recommendation - all of you should stay home in the US.

mtgoat666 - 5-22-2008 at 03:30 PM

sounds like a fear or comfort issue, and advice you get here is meaningless, as it is your wife's fears or sense of comfort you need to deal with.

4 days is plenty of time to dive the penninsula, and have time to stop for mid-day hike or swim. even if you arrive in Cabo late, your wife can get a cab from airport to condo (prime her for this possibility, or you will be starting off the trip in the dog house).
Some kids whine, fidget and complain on long car rides - you know your kid best, you decide. DVDs and tranquilizers help :lol:

longlegsinlapaz - 5-22-2008 at 03:41 PM

As long as you have a good relationship with both the kids & they mind you well, get along & are able to provide company & entertain one another on those long boring stretches of road on the ride when you need to concentrate on the road/cows/dogs/goats/pedestrians/rocks/buses & semis....GO FOR IT! Okay, I cheated! I don't have kids, but I've made the drive 6-8 times; driving during daylight hours ONLY; as many times as I've made it with someone....including my 90-year-old mother! :bounce:

WHAT? Is she worried you'll trade off drivers with the 7-year-old on the trip down? :lol:

....Yet another solitary female of sturdy pioneer stock! :spingrin:

We go where no man has gone before!

TMW - 5-22-2008 at 05:05 PM

The La Pinta hotels are now call the Desert Inn. Kids often get bored on long car trips, you just need to keep him busy with whatever he enjoys. Books, music, games etc. But you also need to point out and discuss with him all that you see along the way. Stop every so often and teach him the vegetation along the hwy, The Roberts plant guide is a great book. Do you know the story behind the Boojum trees? Or the elephant tree. How and why all the volcanic rock in various areas. Count the 22 wheel trucks along the way. Explain the salt works at Guerrero Negro. The Kings hwy and missions. It's an easy on/off to visit the missions at San Ignacio, Mulege and Loreto. look for parts of the old road. Teach him the money system of Mexico and practice your spanish. I can think of lots of things to do on a trip down but I always run out of time.

David K - 5-22-2008 at 05:13 PM

For Baja missions (photos, location and brief history): http://vivabaja.com/bajamissions

For finding the King's Highway (EL CAMINO REAL) from Loreto (the FIRST California Jesuit mission) to El Rosario (the first California Dominican mission) see: http://vivabaja.com/ECR

(El Rosario north to San Diego, the ECR follows Hwy. 1 fairly well and development or wet climate has obliterated any traces, unlike south of El Rosario)

Bajagypsy - 5-22-2008 at 08:12 PM

Honestly, make sure you have drinks and lots of snacks for your son, you said you have a dvd player and a PSP, make sure he has his favorite movies, and pack some books, we also play an alphabet game with our kids in the car (we have four that are troopers at long travel Canada - Cabo long!!). To play the alphabet game, you start with A and everyone has to look outside the vehicle with something that starts with the letter A. Once some says they found something that starts with the letter A and says "A I saw an Apple Tree" that person gets a gummy bear or some such treat. Then they have to spell it, if they get it correct another gummy bear, if they don't the next child gets a turn and so on.

Another great way for kids to be happy on a long trip, is if they get to be part of it, help look for turn offs, read the map, plot the next gas stop etc.

Stop for pee breaks and after everyone has gone, have him run laps around the vehicle. Our kids know that even if it is 3:00 am and we have stopped for gas, everyone gets out of the vehicle has a pee and runs around the parking lot. (We drive non stop from Canada to Mexico).

I drove for 18 hours straight in Northern Canada (very remote, didn't see another car for 5 hours, no cell service nothing) with our four kids and it wasn't as bad as it sounds!!!! Stay calm, don't stress over the small stuff and it will be grand. The bonding you will have with your son, is something that both of you will fondly remember forever.

[Edited on 5-23-2008 by Bajagypsy]

[Edited on 5-23-2008 by Bajagypsy]

Barry A. - 5-22-2008 at 10:43 PM

Very well said, Gypsy, and I can testify that your ideas really work----------we traveled the same way for years, and still do, but not for as long as we used to. :no:

Barry

Paulina - 5-23-2008 at 09:14 AM

My kids also listened to books on tape. We'd visit the library before we left and borrowed a good sized stack. They were usually quiet while they listened to their stories which helped me with the driving. They also tend to look out the windows instead of down at the gameboy. (not to take away from the entertainment/quiet factor electronics provide, I just liked my kids to see Baja.)

Regarding those potty stops...my son was calling for them more frequently than I thought he should. Come to find out he was using the opportunity to collect rocks. He'd come out from behind the bush with his pants loaded for bear.

I bought him a urinal. There was plenty of time for rock collecting once we arrived at our destination.

P<*)))><

Bajafun777 - 5-23-2008 at 09:52 AM

Look if you worry about the sky falling all the time then you will never enjoy life. Bad things happen everywhere and I agree bad things have been happening in Mexico but using good "common sense" keeps you safe 99% of the time. Nothing is 100% and I have seen good people in safe communities here in the States with all the security in the world and good police become victimized and hurt. Bad things happen we can not change that only try to take reasonable care to avoid it, as much as is possible without closing ourselves into locked bricked homes. Not driving at night is the big one, always travel with another couple or friends if the oppurtunity is present just makes for a better safer trip and improves friendships also. You need to let your wife see the precautions you are taking and link-up with some nomads in the area your going to from this "board" so the little things you may miss just might be experienced. Never to "old" to learn and never never too "old" to just smile and laugh with life as it is experienced. Later-------------------------- bajafun777

teadust - 5-23-2008 at 11:38 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by The Gull
These are hard learned lessons which don't need repeating.

That last sentence is the most diplomatic mastery of understatement I've seen in a long time!

Great stories; yee Gods what a hassle they must have been!

Ken Cooke - 5-25-2008 at 05:09 PM

5 useful ideas:

1. Purchase street maps of Tecate, Ensenada, and Baja California in order that you can do all preparation and logistics before leaving for your trip.

Show your wife that you know exactly where you will be traveling, by using a highlighter, marking on your maps, exactly where you will be driving ida y vuelta.

2. Make her in charge of logistics from the passenger seat of your vehicle while driving. This will help keep her mind off of these fears that she has.

3. Drive during the day. This way, you will be less likely to get lost, and your family will feel more safe.

4. Get your Mexican Pesos from your local bank in the United States so that you do not have to use the ATM machines in Mexico.

5. Have her in charge of your travel documents (Passports, etc.). Know ahead of time about your visas for travel into Baja Sur - where to get the documents, where to get them stamped, where the bank is located, etc. I believe if you show your wife that you are organized, she will feel more confident and less likely to become upset by your idea to travel into Baja.

Hope all of this helps... :light:

ears - 5-27-2008 at 10:57 AM

Thanks for everyone's help and advice. I too love baja and having been visiting and surfing there for over 25years and just want to turn my children onto what I love too. My wife, however, is from England and here experience of northern baja is what is in the news, which is sometimes inaccurate, sensationalized, or is based on fact like the drug war in TJ but can be avoided using common sense. I live in LA feel safe but do not want to walk around venice at night!!! Unfortuanately, there are lots of people out there that have differing opinions on Baja than we do and not based on experience who influence other peoples opinions. This weekend a friend of hers (and her group that she had a discussion with) made the judgement that Baja is not safe basing there facts on the State Dept. Travel Alert for Mexico (which basically urges extreme caution in TJ and not to drive at night or visit areas of protitution) and the "4 Americans shot in Rosarito" which we all know the real story which is about drugs, but others do not and is a perfect example of fearmongering. Hopefully, I'll be traveling down to Cabo the Aug 3 or 4th and might need a driving companion for the border, part of the trip, or all of it (if traveling with someone else and not alone makes my wife feel safer about my well being while traveling across the border.)

Travel Alert
http://travel.state.gov/travel/cis_pa_tw/pa/pa_3028.html

Cypress - 5-27-2008 at 02:10 PM

ears, Traveling alone isn't a bad way to go.

eetdrt88 - 5-27-2008 at 04:16 PM

heres what u do...get a cooler,fill it with ice and beer then place it in the passenger seat of your car where your wife would usually be sitting...then drive to your baja destination ocassionally stopping to enjoy a cold beverage on a sandy beach with no tourists....u will notice that the cooler does not worry or argue with u about petty problems,it works out very well and if it helps u can tape a picture of your wife on the cooler,so as not to forget why u have to drive back home

DENNIS - 5-27-2008 at 05:07 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by eetdrt88
heres what u do...get a cooler,fill it with ice and beer then place it in the passenger seat of your car where your wife would usually be sitting...then drive to your baja destination ocassionally stopping to enjoy a cold beverage on a sandy beach with no tourists....u will notice that the cooler does not worry or argue with u about petty problems,it works out very well and if it helps u can tape a picture of your wife on the cooler,so as not to forget why u have to drive back home

Excellent advice. One must have priorities and the cooler is mine as well. Thanks for your rendetion of Baja Logic.

Osprey - 5-27-2008 at 05:28 PM

You could paint a name on the cooler. How about "Wilson".

ears - 5-27-2008 at 06:11 PM

Yeah baby!!!! I like how you think and totally concur. Coolers don't argue and cold cans of beer can be usd for defense (as I saw on another post)

Gadget - 5-27-2008 at 06:47 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Ken Cooke
5 useful ideas:

1. Purchase street maps of Tecate, Ensenada, and Baja California in order that you can do all preparation and logistics before leaving for your trip.

Show your wife that you know exactly where you will be traveling, by using a highlighter, marking on your maps, exactly where you will be driving ida y vuelta.

2. Make her in charge of logistics from the passenger seat of your vehicle while driving. This will help keep her mind off of these fears that she has.

3. Drive during the day. This way, you will be less likely to get lost, and your family will feel more safe.

4. Get your Mexican Pesos from your local bank in the United States so that you do not have to use the ATM machines in Mexico.

5. Have her in charge of your travel documents (Passports, etc.). Know ahead of time about your visas for travel into Baja Sur - where to get the documents, where to get them stamped, where the bank is located, etc. I believe if you show your wife that you are organized, she will feel more confident and less likely to become upset by your idea to travel into Baja.

Hope all of this helps... :light:

Although the cooler advise is comedic, this advise is seriously legit.
Good post Ken

toneart - 5-28-2008 at 11:18 AM

After all these years I just learned something that had never sunk in before now:

I asked a woman friend, "How can you think that way? It is not logical." She replied, "2 + 2 does not always = 4." :wow:

God love 'em! Earlier enlightenment could have save me a lifetime of confusion and pain.

bajaboolie - 6-4-2008 at 09:21 PM

So ears, what's the verdict?? Have plans been made? Has your wife given you the thumbs up? I'm curious about the outcome of all this discussion... Fill us in! :yes:

dtbushpilot - 6-5-2008 at 03:48 PM

My wife has been going to Baja with me for 6 years now. We have camped at Malarimo beach, Tortugas, Bahia Asuncion, Abriojos, Campo Rene, Bahia Conception, and Los Barilles. We will be leaving for another month long camping trip on the 13th. She can navigate, fish, cook over a fire, open beer without a bottle opener, make margaritas and more and do it all enthusiastically. She claims that she stays with me because I make her laugh and I'm an adventurous guy. She never complains (out loud) about the rustic conditions or the heat and if that's not enough, she is one beautiful woman.

I don't know what I did to deserve her but I'm glad I did it...No, she isn't for sale...or for rent but I'm sure she would be glad to talk to your wife and put some of her fears to rest.

Have fun on your trip and remember to post a report.

David K - 6-5-2008 at 03:52 PM

'Baja Spell Checker' wanted me to post the following... in the spirit of Baja education! :biggrin:

MALARRIMO

ABREOJOS

CONCEPCION

BARRILES

dtbushpilot - 6-5-2008 at 04:33 PM

dtbushpilot speil cheker was too lazy to look it up.....and can't figure out how to put one of those silly smiles on my post either....

bajaboolie - 6-5-2008 at 04:36 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by David K
'Baja Spell Checker' wanted me to post the following... in the spirit of Baja education! :biggrin:

MALARRIMO

ABREOJOS

CONCEPCION

BARRILES

Oh my, David, the rumors are true!!

dtbushpilot, I hope my husband speaks as highly of me as you do of your wife! :biggrin:

Ken Cooke - 6-5-2008 at 09:47 PM

I'm in Tijuana right now, and the only thing I have noticed that is different is there is much more security on the streets, and in all of the mini malls than any other time I have visited.

joel - 6-5-2008 at 11:10 PM

I've driven a lot in Baja with my kids -- every summer for the past three years. They started out 2 and 4 , then 3 and 5, 4 and 6. This summer they are 5 and 7 but we are flying as we left a car in Loreto.

Some of those pics that Juan del Rio posted of the beach in SJ, I can see both my wife and my car. My kids were probably having the time of their life somewhere off camera.

What I would say is that I agree with the posters who say that it is far, far safer than the media or the State Department would suggest. It is still more dangerous than the U.S. and everyone needs to make that call for themselves.

As to the suitability for the kids, that depends on the parents and the kids. We did three straight days of 10 hours driving a day two summers ago -- and we don't believe in electronics in the car other than what's in the dashboard. The kids were cooked by the end of it, but we have friends who can't go 2 hours driving. Those are the friends I advise not to go to Baja. Things will go wrong, and usually it isn't all that bad -- but family travel is about everyone having a good time and one very unhappy camper can turn a road trip in Baja hellish.

Ken Cooke - 6-6-2008 at 01:13 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by joel
What I would say is that I agree with the posters who say that it is far, far safer than the media or the State Department would suggest. It is still more dangerous than the U.S. and everyone needs to make that call for themselves.

I still feel safe here in Tijuana, but when visiting an ATM machine after dark in downtown Tijuana, I had a "run-in" with two thieves. It would have been best to have visited an OXXO store during daylight because these thieves operate after dark, and attempted to prey on lone bank customers like myself. Nothing was stolen, but I was prepared and ready for a fight. Both guys were quite a bit smaller than me, but I came to party and not get into fights. Asi puede ser la vida Tijuanese..