BajaNomad - How to tell if you are Mexican....

How to tell if you are Mexican....

sanquintinsince73 - 2-7-2012 at 01:45 PM

Passed on to me by my dear friend Henry

Check your M e x i c a n status

If you can run and play any sport while wearing chanclas....Mexican status!!

If your late Tio left you a van and you turned it into a taco vending business, Yes, you're a Mexican.

If you pronounce words beginning with the letter "S" by putting an "E" in front of it, (estop instead of stop), big time Mexican.

If you call a chair, a sher, you got it.... Mexican.

If you have ever hurt yourself and your mamacita rubbed the area while chanting, " Sana , Sana , Colita de rana....." You're Mexican, big time!!!

If you have your last name in old English lettering anywhere on your car, truck, or tattooed on your back. Yes, you ARE a Mexican (proud one too).

If you refer to your wife as yo ur ruca, your hina, your wifa, your old lady, or your vieja, guess what? Not only are you a Mexican, you're a cholo.

If you throw a "Grito" every time you hear Vicente Fernandez, then not only are you a Mexican, but you are a drunk Mexican.

If you have ever been P-nched in church and been told "pobrecito de ti si lloras" or "Vas a ver orita que salgamos." Yes, you're definitely a Mexican.

If yo u grew up being called "chamaca or chamaco" ...Mexican.

If you grew up scared of La Llorona, or fear the dark because of El CuCuy! Yes! Mexican!

Si te persinas with a lotto ticket in your hand before every drawing. You're in the Mexican Zone!!!

If you ask for something by "dame esa " instead of calling it by its name, Yup! Mexican!

If you constantly refer to cereal as "con fleys" or cake as "kay-ke". You're a Mexican.

If you use manteca instead of v egetable oil and can't figure out why your butt is getting bigger......You might be a Mexican.

If you have some Tias that dress up in their prom dresses to go to a birthday party at "el parque". You are a Mexican.

If your Tias and Abuela dress up in their Sunday best with heels and all to go to the "pulga." (AKA the Flea Market) Then, yes, you are a Mexican.

If most of the houses on your block are painted bright pink, mint green, and lavender. Mexican.

If you use the bushes in front of your house, the fence, or the top of an old car to dry laundry. Yes, you're a Mexican.

If you're congested and your mamasita rubbed "Bicks". You're Mexican.

DENNIS - 2-7-2012 at 02:01 PM

And another.....If you are driving your car out in the middle of nowhere, nothing but nothing for miles around except one parked car in the center of this vast space, and you park your car two inches from his rear bumber....you are a Mexican.

KASHEYDOG - 2-7-2012 at 02:36 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by DENNIS
And another.....If you are driving your car out in the middle of nowhere, nothing but nothing for miles around except one parked car in the center of this vast space, and you park your car two inches from his rear bumber....you are a Mexican.

...

Dennis.....I've said it before and I'll say it again...." You velly funny man. You maka me raff...."

[Edited on 2-7-12 by KASHEYDOG]

DENNIS - 2-7-2012 at 02:40 PM

ooops....I spelled bumper wrong. Ohh well....I'll make up for it later.

KASHEYDOG - 2-7-2012 at 02:45 PM

Quote:

Jeez, Dennis if you hadn't said anything I would have thought you were just talkin' with a Mexican accent......... :lol:

watizname - 2-7-2012 at 10:47 PM

Really, I thought "bumber" was part of the joke :lol:

Ha Ha

EnsenadaDr - 2-7-2012 at 11:09 PM

I was just about to post that...good I looked first...I thought he did it on purpose!!!

Quote:

Originally posted by KASHEYDOG

Quote:

Jeez, Dennis if you hadn't said anything I would have thought you were just talkin' with a Mexican accent......... :lol:

Love this post!!!

EnsenadaDr - 2-7-2012 at 11:11 PM

I loved this post!!!

Quote:

Originally posted by sanquintinsince73
Passed on to me by my dear friend Henry

Check your M e x i c a n status

If you can run and play any sport while wearing chanclas....Mexican status!!

If your late Tio left you a van and you turned it into a taco vending business, Yes, you're a Mexican.

If you pronounce words beginning with the letter "S" by putting an "E" in front of it, (estop instead of stop), big time Mexican.

If you call a chair, a sher, you got it.... Mexican.

If you have ever hurt yourself and your mamacita rubbed the area while chanting, " Sana , Sana , Colita de rana....." You're Mexican, big time!!!

If you have your last name in old English lettering anywhere on your car, truck, or tattooed on your back. Yes, you ARE a Mexican (proud one too).

If you refer to your wife as yo ur ruca, your hina, your wifa, your old lady, or your vieja, guess what? Not only are you a Mexican, you're a cholo.

If you throw a "Grito" every time you hear Vicente Fernandez, then not only are you a Mexican, but you are a drunk Mexican.

If you have ever been P-nched in church and been told "pobrecito de ti si lloras" or "Vas a ver orita que salgamos." Yes, you're definitely a Mexican.

If yo u grew up being called "chamaca or chamaco" ...Mexican.

If you grew up scared of La Llorona, or fear the dark because of El CuCuy! Yes! Mexican!

Si te persinas with a lotto ticket in your hand before every drawing. You're in the Mexican Zone!!!

If you ask for something by "dame esa " instead of calling it by its name, Yup! Mexican!

If you constantly refer to cereal as "con fleys" or cake as "kay-ke". You're a Mexican.

If you use manteca instead of v egetable oil and can't figure out why your butt is getting bigger......You might be a Mexican.

If you have some Tias that dress up in their prom dresses to go to a birthday party at "el parque". You are a Mexican.

If your Tias and Abuela dress up in their Sunday best with heels and all to go to the "pulga." (AKA the Flea Market) Then, yes, you are a Mexican.

If most of the houses on your block are painted bright pink, mint green, and lavender. Mexican.

If you use the bushes in front of your house, the fence, or the top of an old car to dry laundry. Yes, you're a Mexican.

If you're congested and your mamasita rubbed "Bicks". You're Mexican.

Dave - 2-8-2012 at 02:00 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by KASHEYDOG

Quote:

...

Dennis.....I've said it before and I'll say it again...." You velly funny man. You maka me raff...."

[Edited on 2-7-12 by KASHEYDOG]

If you've ever come out of the Calimax early in the morning and found yourself blocked in by a Bimbo bread truck you wouldn't think it was funny.

DENNIS - 2-8-2012 at 07:19 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Dave
If you've ever come out of the Calimax early in the morning and found yourself blocked in by a Bimbo bread truck you wouldn't think it was funny.

I got that two days ago by a Coca Cola truck at the local fish taco stand.
Seriously...there is something cultural about this phenomona, but we'll save it for another thread.

Ken Bondy - 2-8-2012 at 07:33 AM

sanquintinsince73 how many of those do you need to satisfy to qualify as Mexican? All of them? Just one? Some percentage? I am pretty sure I was a Mexican in another life, but after looking at that list I think I could pull it off in this one also, unless you need all of them. There are a few that aren't me but I recognize myself in a pretty significant percentage.

MitchMan - 2-8-2012 at 10:58 AM

If you pronounce the word “sandwich” as “sangwich”, you’re a Mexican. If you pronounce the word “church” as “shursh” while pronouncing the word “shelf” as “chelf”, you’re a Mexican. If, in your living room, you had pictures of Our Lady of Guadalupe, JFK, and the eldest son in a picture with his army uniform on, you’re a Mexican. If you grew up in a household that didn’t have any books on literature or history, you’re probably a Mexican. If your house always smells like food, you’re probably a Mexican. If, when visiting family, you always return with some wrapped food, you’re probably a Mexican. If you got your First Communion and you were Confirmed, but you still don’t know as much about the bible as your protestant friends, you’re probably a Mexican. If you respect your father and mother and the elderly in general, you’re probably a Mexican.

sanquintinsince73 - 2-8-2012 at 11:03 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by MitchMan
If you pronounce the word “sandwich” as “sangwich”, you’re a Mexican. If you pronounce the word “church” as “shursh” while pronouncing the word “shelf” as “chelf”, you’re a Mexican. If, in your living room, you had pictures of Our Lady of Guadalupe, JFK, and the eldest son in a picture with his army uniform on, you’re a Mexican. If you grew up in a household that didn’t have any books on literature or history, you’re probably a Mexican. If your house always smells like food, you’re probably a Mexican. If, when visiting family, you always return with some wrapped food, you’re probably a Mexican. If you got your First Communion and you were Confirmed, but you still don’t know as much about the bible as your protestant friends, you’re probably a Mexican. If you respect your father and mother and the elderly in general, you’re probably a Mexican.

sancho - 2-8-2012 at 11:38 AM

I believe the the letter V is pronounced as a B,
as in the grocery store Von's comes out Bon's,
and my favorite is the ever present P-nche Gringo,
not that I take offense to the word Gringo

BajaBlanca - 2-8-2012 at 12:08 PM

if you call hotdogs WEENIES you are a Mexican !! oh did I get a kick outta that one ....

Oso - 2-8-2012 at 02:16 PM

"Bicks"- The first several times my suegra referred to this ointment, I thought she was saying "Big Bopparoo"

sanquintinsince73 - 2-8-2012 at 02:40 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Oso
"Bicks"- The first several times my suegra referred to this ointment, I thought she was saying "Big Bopparoo"

Good one. The first time my wife asked if she could rub some "Baporoo" on my chest I thought "WTF?".

sanquintinsince73 - 2-8-2012 at 02:43 PM

Another one my wife refuses to at least pronounce correctly is cottage cheese. She say's "queso cotaj".

Spearo - 2-8-2012 at 03:14 PM

If you can fix a broken leaf spring on a boat trailer with strips of old innertube and some kite string you are a Mexican.

If you can catch a 30# yellowtail on a handline you are a Mexican

If you can file a new woodruff key out of scrap metal and fix the shaft of your 1972 Evinrude 40 horse, you are a Mexican

toneart - 2-8-2012 at 03:27 PM

I am sensing a great collective sigh of relief, as though a dark cloud has been lifted. Nomads are playing again. Levity prevails. You are demonstrating the love, the joy and the humor you have for Mexican Culture, just as we gringos have characteristics that they make fun of. It is not racist nor is it demeaning. It is endearing. :bounce:

MitchMan - 2-8-2012 at 03:36 PM

spearo.. Here, here!

sanquintinsince73 - 2-8-2012 at 03:37 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Spearo
If you can fix a broken leaf spring on a boat trailer with strips of old innertube and some kite string you are a Mexican.

If you can catch a 30# yellowtail on a handline you are a Mexican

If you can file a new woodruff key out of scrap metal and fix the shaft of your 1972 Evinrude 40 horse, you are a Mexican

30 lb. yellow on handline.....sound's like "Baitcast".

vgabndo - 2-8-2012 at 11:25 PM

In Baja I have said for years: En mi corazon soy un parte Mexicano. I believe it.

My piece...If jumper cables have ever played prominently at a family wedding..........

Hey Ken...does this prove anything?

[Edited on 2-9-2012 by vgabndo]

IMG_0389 (Small).JPG - 48kB

Skipjack Joe - 2-9-2012 at 01:27 AM

It proves that your boat trailer wasn't baja-ready.

vgabndo - 2-9-2012 at 06:45 PM

It had been ready to take the boat from the house to the beach for ten years, I credit Julio for weakening the tongue!!

Copy (10) of IMG_0197 (Small).JPG - 43kB

Copy (10) of IMG_0197 (Small).JPG - 43kB

angels4 - 2-10-2012 at 07:26 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by BajaBlanca
if you call hotdogs WEENIES you are a Mexican !! oh did I get a kick outta that one ....

Wow! I have been a very confused kid all my life! :?:

I thought Weenies was the real name! But one very famous telling sign you are a "Messican" is if your grandmother used the Mole Dona Maria container as its fine glassware and the butter plastic container as the Mexican-Tupperware. :lol:

And let us not forget about the good ol' eternal mom saying "Ay Dios mio, que hice para merecer un hijo/a como tu??" (Oh God what did I do to get a son/daughter like you??) :saint:

sanquintinsince73 - 2-10-2012 at 10:19 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by angels4

Quote:

Originally posted by BajaBlanca
if you call hotdogs WEENIES you are a Mexican !! oh did I get a kick outta that one ....

Wow! I have been a very confused kid all my life! :?:

And let us not forget about the good ol' eternal mom saying "Ay Dios mio, que hice para merecer un hijo/a como tu??" (Oh God what did I do to get a son/daughter like you??) :saint:

wessongroup - 2-10-2012 at 10:56 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by toneart
I am sensing a great collective sigh of relief, as though a dark cloud has been lifted. Nomads are playing again. Levity prevails. You are demonstrating the love, the joy and the humor you have for Mexican Culture, just as we gringos have characteristics that they make fun of. It is not racist nor is it demeaning. It is endearing. :bounce:

Ditto's... the wife still uses them and keep every plastic bag she get's at the market... uses them for all kinds of things.. trash can liners..

And don't even get me started on tupperware... think it was designed to develop new life forms.... as that is what one can find ... when cleaning out the refrigerator ... WOW.. what ya can find ...

Thanks 73 for a great thread ... glad we can still laugh at our selves just a little ... still ....

sanquintinsince73 - 2-10-2012 at 11:16 AM

I just remembered one that I've seen in Baja and in my old stomping grounds in E.L.A., car's with a broken rear tail light and instead of replacing it they put red transparent tape over it.

Martyman - 2-10-2012 at 01:18 PM

You guys funny!

MitchMan - 2-10-2012 at 01:26 PM

If you 'need' to carry jumper cables in your trunk, you might be a Mexican. If you don't know that towing a car behind your own with a rope is illegal in Los Angeles, you might be a Mexican. If you don't replace a failed brake light bulb until a cop stops you, you might be a Mexican. If you refer to cherry flavored kool-aid as "red Kool-aid", you might be a Mexican. If wearing clean pressed khaki pants, spit shined French Toe shoes, duck tail hair, and a Pendleton or Sir Guy wool shirt was "dressing up" to you when you were a teenager, you might be an ex-cholo. If you owned a 49 Chevy with a metal-flaked paint job, spinners, chi chi balls, tuck n'roll upholstery, truck sized steering wheel, raked or dagoed, stick shift with 3 on the column with some road bounce, and you knew guys by the name of 'Chuy' or 'Veto' and didn't know anybody by the name of Kevin, Bryan, or Tyler, you were definitely a cholo.

[Edited on 2-10-2012 by MitchMan]

[Edited on 2-10-2012 by MitchMan]

DENNIS - 2-10-2012 at 01:37 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by MitchMan
If you don't know that towing a car behind your own with a rope is illegal in Los Angeles, you might be a Mexican.

Ain't profiling fun? Good ones Mitch. :lol:

By the way.........that rope towing thing is illegal here too. :light:

sanquintinsince73 - 2-10-2012 at 02:09 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by MitchMan
If you 'need' to carry jumper cables in your trunk, you might be a Mexican. If you don't know that towing a car behind your own with a rope is illegal in Los Angeles, you might be a Mexican. If you don't replace a failed brake light bulb until a cop stops you, you might be a Mexican. If you refer to cherry flavored kool-aid as "red Kool-aid", you might be a Mexican. If wearing clean pressed khaki pants, spit shined French Toe shoes, duck tail hair, and a Pendleton or Sir Guy wool shirt was "dressing up" to you when you were a teenager, you might be an ex-cholo. If you owned a 49 Chevy with a metal-flaked paint job, spinners, chi chi balls, tuck n'roll upholstery, truck sized steering wheel, raked or dagoed, stick shift with 3 on the column with some road bounce, and you knew guys by the name of 'Chuy' or 'Veto' and didn't know anybody by the name of Kevin, Bryan, or Tyler, you were definitely a cholo.

[Edited on 2-10-2012 by MitchMan]

[Edited on 2-10-2012 by MitchMan]

Did you live down the street from me when I was kid or something?
:lol:

JoeJustJoe - 2-10-2012 at 02:58 PM

There may be a place for stereotype racial jokes like in the comedy club down by a proud Latino comedian.

I myself like a good ethic joke now and them, and know how to get down in the mud and tell racial jokes. Nothing cracks me up more than a good Polish or Jewish joke. :lol:

In my opinion these types of negative stereotypes Mexican or ethic chain email type jokes should have no place in the open forum where the majority of members are white, and they're making fun of Mexicans with negative stereotype that are thought of to occur in the Mexican barrios.

Now I would give the jokes a pass if Sanquintinsince was a proud Chicano and was just telling jokes about the Homeboys, and the things he fondly remembers growing up in East Los Angeles, but Sanquintinsince barely acknowledges his proud ancestral heritage, and instead calls himself a proud American.

So I'll treat Sanquintinsince like I would any other gringo telling racial jokes about Mexicans. It like a white guy telling racial jokes about blacks. It just doesn't go over very well, however Blacks telling racial jokes about other blacks can be funny.

Racial stereotyping is really damaging to Mexicans, and Latinos everywhere, espeically when we have Americans actually believing those racial stereotypes include "ALL" Mexicans.

When you start a thread like this. It usually slides down a slippery slope of Mexican bashing. Thank God this thread remained relatively tame.

If anything a thread like this and the bolillo thread belong in the "OT" section.

I included an "how to tell if you are white"joke topic in the "OT" area. Just imagine if I did one on Jews? Could you just imagine the "outrage?" I don't get it. Why can people make fun of Mexicans and Muslims, but Jews are a protected group of people, and we really don't see too much of "white jokes" either.

[Edited on 2-10-2012 by JoeJustJoe]

MitchMan - 2-10-2012 at 03:09 PM

Joe, as usual, you make very, very valid points. I hope that my posts haven't offended, as I intend no mean spirited offense. The real test of being offensive, however, is whether or not anyone is actually offended.

If anyone has been offended by my posts in this thread I sincerely and earnestly apologize.

DENNIS - 2-10-2012 at 03:45 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by MitchMan
If anyone has been offended by my posts in this thread I sincerely and earnestly apologize.

Yeah??? Well...I'm offended. Don't have a clue as to why, but I just feel like spending a couple of hours being offended.
Thank you for offending me. Very thoughtful of you. :biggrin:

sancho - 2-10-2012 at 03:55 PM

Where is Carlos Mencia when
we need him , opps, he is Honduran

[Edited on 2-10-2012 by sancho]

sanquintinsince73 - 2-10-2012 at 03:58 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by MitchMan
Joe, as usual, you make very, very valid points. I hope that my posts haven't offended, as I intend no mean spirited offense. The real test of being offensive, however, is whether or not anyone is actually offended.

If anyone has been offended by my posts in this thread I sincerely and earnestly apologize.

MitchMan, you have in no way offended me or any other "Chicano" who's read this post.

sanquintinsince73 - 2-10-2012 at 04:07 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by JoeJustJoe
There may be a place for stereotype racial jokes like in the comedy club down by a proud Latino comedian.

I myself like a good ethic joke now and them, and know how to get down in the mud and tell racial jokes. Nothing cracks me up more than a good Polish or Jewish joke. :lol:

C'mon JJJ lighten up. I believe that it is human nature to poke fun at oneself. Now if this thread were posted in a KKK site then I would consider the source and probably conclude that the posters are racists. Now as far as Jews being a "protected" group of people, I just don't see it. God forbid anyone anywhere even whisper a joke about Muslims because you're labeled a "Islamaphobic".

By the way, why don't Mexicans barbecue? Because the beans fall thru the grill. :lol:

JoeJustJoe - 2-10-2012 at 04:27 PM

Quote:

Nice post Mitch, and really I was just making a point these types of threads tend to degenerate into the gutter.

If I have a bone to pick with anyone. I would have a bone to pick with Sanquintinsince who should know better, but he doesn't.

I just love it when guys say, c'mon lighten up, you're being too PC. ( That's code word for let me be racist)

Of course when I make fun of these guys, and their racial heritage back. They get all hot and bothered.

vgabndo - 2-10-2012 at 04:30 PM

I'm with Mitch...For my part if having a heartfelt desire to be part Mexican is offensive, I'm accountable. For sure I was a gringo repeating an old joke. However, I'd have missed my brother's wedding without the jumper cables. :lol:

The trailer picture...pure honoring of the Mexican tradition of getting things done with what is available. It is one of the things I most respect about the culture.

There is a whole genre out there of Red-Nexican and Hick-Spanic performers apparently playing off the success of "cable guy" kind of self deprecating stuff.

sanquintinsince73 - 2-10-2012 at 04:35 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by JoeJustJoe

Quote:

Like someone here posted, my mom also used to save every glass container of "Doña Maria" mole mix and use them as drinking glasses. My wife to this day tries to save empty butter containers and tries to use them as TupperWare. I think that is hilarious. You and I swam at the same swimming hole in Pico and we called it Marrano Beach. Now that you think back don't you see the funny aspect of it? The closest beach was over 20 miles away but we had our own "beach" in our back yard.

JoeJustJoe - 2-10-2012 at 04:42 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by sancho
Where is Carlos Mencia when
we need him , opps, he is Honduran

[Edited on 2-10-2012 by sancho]

In my opinion there are few worse people in the world than fake Mexicans, or as Mencia calls himself a "Beaner, and then gives himself a pass for making fun and bashing Mexicans with racial stereotypes. ( these other Latino immigrants under the Latino umbrella are many times hostile towards Mexicans for a variety of reasons)

Ned Holness, aka Carlos Mencia is known for ripping off other Comedians work like George Lopez. Mencia's plagiarism is well known, and many people don't think he is very funny:

From the Urban Dictionary:
__________________________________________

Carlos Mencia's real name. Born in Honduras with a German father. Ned thinks because he was born near Mexico he has the right to call himself ******* and classify himself as "beaner." He is well known for ripping other people off and getting all the credit. He got his stage name from a comedy club because "it sounded more Mexican."

Nobody should watch his stupid show either, which is just rehashed sketches of other comedians jokes. I think he pays the audience to laugh. All he has going for him is his "controversial and edgy" material which I already heard from about a hundred different comics before hand.

Ned Holness is a hack and he flocking gives comedy a bad name. He rips people off and tries to be something he's not. Hopefully people will see the light and stop supporting him and he will lose all his money and have to be deported. He also announced on a radio show that he gave himself a nickname. What a flocking tool.

Joe Rogan recently handed Ned's ass to him and the video can be seen all over the internet. Finally someone has the balls to stand up to this flocking hack.
I flocking hate Ned Holness and so should you. He's a flocking thief, a hack, a loser, and he is not funny. I guarentee Ned has never spent one day living as a normal Mexican.

Ned, either apologize to the world and every struggling comedian that deserves that success you stole, or simply retire from ripping people and get a day job. Or you can move to Mexico and back up everything you say.

Oh yea if you don't believe a word I say, do some research for yourself.

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Ned%20Holness

[Edited on 2-10-2012 by JoeJustJoe]

sanquintinsince73 - 2-10-2012 at 04:45 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by JoeJustJoe

Quote:

Originally posted by sancho
Where is Carlos Mencia when
we need him , opps, he is Honduran

[Edited on 2-10-2012 by sancho]

In my opinion there are few worst in the world than fake Mexicans, or as Mencia calls himself a "Beaner, and then gives himself a pass for making fun and bashing Mexicans. ( these other Latino immigrants are many times hostile towards Mexicans for a variety of reasons)

Ned Holness, aka Carlos Mencia is known for ripping off other Comedians work like George Lopez. Mencia's plagiarism is well known, and many people don't think he is very funny:

From the Urban Dictionary:
__________________________________________

Carlos Mencia's real name. Born in Honduras with a German father. Ned thinks because he was born near Mexico he has the right to call himself ******* and classify himself as "beaner." He is well known for ripping other people off and getting all the credit. He got his stage name from a comedy club because "it sounded more Mexican."

Nobody should watch his stupid show either, which is just rehashed sketches of other comedians jokes. I think he pays the audience to laugh. All he has going for him is his "controversial and edgy" material which I already heard from about a hundred different comics before hand.

Ned Holness is a hack and he fricking gives comedy a bad name. He rips people off and tries to be something he's not. Hopefully people will see the light and stop supporting him and he will lose all his money and have to be deported. He also announced on a radio show that he gave himself a nickname. What a fricking tool.

Joe Rogan recently handed Ned's burro to him and the video can be seen all over the internet. Finally someone has the balls to stand up to this fricking hack.
I fricking hate Ned Holness and so should you. He's a fricking thief, a hack, a loser, and he is not funny. I guarentee Ned has never spent one day living as a normal Mexican.

Ned, either apologize to the world and every struggling comedian that deserves that success you stole, or simply retire from ripping people and get a day job. Or you can move to Mexico and back up everything you say.

Oh yea if you don't believe a word I say, do some research for yourself.

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Ned%20Holness

I find myself on unfamiliar territory....I agree with JJJ. I cannot stand "Mencia".

vgabndo - 2-10-2012 at 04:49 PM

"Like someone here posted, my mom also used to save every glass container of "Doña Maria" mole mix and use them as drinking glasses. "

What on EARTH could be WRONG with those things?

Your mom's culture knew about reusing and recycling so long ago that it is having to be re-taught today.

My folks were unwelcome immigrants to California from a very poor country called The Dust Bowl. They re-used every cottage cheese container and every coffee mug in the house came free from the gas station.

I see nothing in frugality to disrespect.

I have a couple of sweet 6 oz. flowered drinking glasses on my shelf which used to be Mexican candles. :lol:

[Edited on 2-10-2012 by vgabndo]

sancho - 2-11-2012 at 11:38 AM

Not to leave anyone out and level the playing field,
since as pointed out, MOST of us are not Hispanic,
the only item I can come up with is, I believe his
name is Jeff Foxworthy, 'you know your a Redneck
when your house has wheels',' more than 4 dogs
on your porch','married to your cousin' etc. I can't
remember any good ole
caucasion, whitey, jokes, although I'm sure they are
around in some circles

Spearo - 2-11-2012 at 12:03 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by sancho
Not to leave anyone out and level the playing field,
since as pointed out, MOST of us are not Hispanic,
the only item I can come up with is, I believe his
name is Jeff Foxworthy, 'you know your a Redneck
when your house has wheels',' more than 4 dogs
on your porch','married to your cousin' etc. I can't
remember any good ole
caucasion, whitey, jokes, although I'm sure they are
around in some circles

In the spirit of poking fun at your own culture...being from Idaho I submit this one:

Why aren't cowboys circumcised?

So they have somewhere to put their chew when they're brushing their teeth.

durrelllrobert - 2-11-2012 at 12:03 PM

JJJ says: Why can people make fun of Mexicans and Muslims, but Jews are a protected group of people?
Me says: Sure we can make fun of Mexicans, because that enjoy it, but you never can make fun of Muslims because anything said about them could result in death. As for the Jews being protected from fun making I was not aware of that but if JJJ said it it must be true.

DENNIS - 2-11-2012 at 01:29 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by sancho
'you know your a Redneck
when your house has wheels',' more than 4 dogs
on your porch','married to your cousin' etc. I can't
remember any good ole
caucasion, whitey, jokes, although I'm sure they are
around in some circles

Here are some very funny one-liner jokes from Jeff Foxworthy, the “Redneck comedian”:

Changing a diaper is a lot like getting a present from your grandmother – you’re not sure what you’ve got but you’re pretty sure you’re not going to like it.

For the first time ever I was taking the family on the road. We stayed with my in-laws, which on life’s list of experiences ranks right below sitting in a tub full of scissors.

I have never been jealous. Not even when my dad finished fifth grade a year before I did.

I tried real hard to play golf, and I was so bad at it they would have to check me for ticks at the end of the round because I’d spent about half the day in the woods.

I used to say that whenever people heard my Southern accent, they always wanted to deduct 100 IQ points.

I’ve been to all 50 states, and traveled this whole country, and 90 percent of the people are good folks. The rest of them take after the other side of the family.

If you ever start feeling like you have the goofiest, craziest, most dysfunctional family in the world, all you have to do is go to a state fair. Because five minutes at the fair, you’ll be going, ‘you know, we’re alright. We are dang near royalty.’

If you have a complete set of salad bowls and they all say Kool Whip on the side, you might be a redneck.

If you own a home with wheels on it and several cars without, you just might be a redneck.

If you’ve ever made change in the offering plate, you might be a redneck.

If your neighbors think you’re a detective because a cop always brings you home, you might be a redneck.

If your working television sits on top of your non-working television, you might be a redneck.

My wife is so analytical with raising kids, and I am not. My feeling is if they turn out good, then that means I was a good daddy and put a lot of effort into it. If they turn out bad, it means they took after her side of the family.

Now, it’s true I married my wife for her looks… but not the ones she’s been givin’ me lately.

Watching a baby being born is a little like watching a wet St. Bernard coming in through the cat door.

You may be a redneck if… you have spent more on your pickup truck than on your education.

You may be a redneck if… your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.
You might be a redneck if… the blue book value of your truck goes up and down depending on how much gas it has in it.

You moon the wrong person at an office party and suddenly you’re not ‘professional’ any more.

and more

http://www.fortogden.com/foredneck.html

wessongroup - 2-11-2012 at 01:31 PM

Thanks still laughing ...

DENNIS - 2-11-2012 at 01:37 PM

"Watching a baby being born is a little like watching a wet St. Bernard coming in through the cat door"
------------------

Foxworthy............ :lol:

wessongroup - 2-11-2012 at 01:41 PM

unknown ... :lol:

BAJACAT - 2-11-2012 at 02:03 PM

you are mexican if you store items on your house roof..

PS. most of those items you don't need..or they don't belong to you..

vgabndo - 2-11-2012 at 03:13 PM

Excellent Wiley... :lol:

This just prompted me to remember Hispanic men on construction crews with me who turned their tee shirts inside out at work. I always assumed that it was so they could reverse it and go home not LOOKING dirty; a point of pride in appearance.

I'd be curious to know if there was something in this I missed.

[Edited on 2-11-2012 by vgabndo]

sanquintinsince73 - 2-11-2012 at 05:41 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by vgabndo
Excellent Wiley... :lol:

The B.O. stays on the inside and you get to wear a clean shirt at the bar.

You are Mexican if...

EnsenadaDr - 2-12-2012 at 06:27 AM

Your dog stays on the rooftop and you order tortillas with breakfast in the morning instead of toast or biscuits...(I personally like the latter!!!)

Quote:

Originally posted by BAJACAT
you are mexican if you store items on your house roof..

PS. most of those items you don't need..or they don't belong to you..

sancho - 2-12-2012 at 01:21 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by DENNIS
Here are some very funny one-liner jokes from Jeff Foxworthy, the “Redneck comedian”:

D, Thanks for INADVERTENTLY bailing me out on my ill
referenced comedian C. Mencia. I feel responsible for opening
the door for someone to post that 1 crass, rude, Mencia
quote. I apologize to anyone who was offended
by that persons post, I was. I should have a little more
foresight

[Edited on 2-12-2012 by sancho]