BajaNomad - After DT's Rust post, it's time to reprise this old thing

After DT's Rust post, it's time to reprise this old thing

Osprey - 11-13-2012 at 07:47 AM

Coming Clean

It won't be necessary to name names. You know who you are. We sure as hell know who you are; we know everything about you. Perhaps this is the perfect time for somebody to speak up, tell the truth, even if it hurts.

We see the silent little shudders you make when you see beach sand all over the bottom of our boats. We feel the hair going up on your neck when you spy some dried fish blood on the transom that somebody missed. You feel so superior when you notice that some of our rods, reels show some corrosion.

It's the same way at the house, the garage, when you look at our tools, our yard, trucks, cars. That sort of "isn't that awful" look and posture of disdain. You can't help it. You can't help being neat, fastidious any more than you can keep from breathing. Some of you may even think being neat is a kind of "manly" thing. Most of us think it's a feminine trait; we see you as being sensitive and subjective, sometimes judgmental. Usually you're quiet about your disrespect, your pity.

You hate us. Admit it, you think we're "slobs". You're thinking "that guy really doesn't care about his equipment/truck/fishing gear. Maybe he doesn't even see the dirt, the rust. Maybe to him it's invisible. God, I couldn't live like that."

We are Hate Free. We exist to make you feel superior. And we DO know the difference, we see everything. We just don't go all to pieces about it. We see it. That black/purple spot in the bed of my truck is some marlin blood from a big striper I caught two years ago. Oh, I could really get down, pick at it, scrape it up but I haven't because when I see it I can almost relive the day. There's a little black thing that looks like part of a big spring lodged in the hinge of the tailgate of the old Ford. It's not a piece of metal, it's part of a tentacle of the biggest damned squid I ever caught; more than six feet long, probably 70 pounds; 1997 or 98 I think it was. These are not just spots, they're memory markers....wash them away and you lose all the precious memories of the adventure.

While you're watching the DIY channel on TV, we're watching Offshore Saltwater Adventures. While we're kickin back, relaxing, you're on a tear. You have somehow hooked your self-esteem up to just how clean and neat your things are, your life is. You hustle about keeping things shipshape still carrying all that hate, disdain around with you.

All your spotless trucks (you washed the paint off them), your polished reels, gleaming lacquered rods, your shining boats and motors set us apart, draw a deep line in the sand that you can feel good about. You can fail in business, be a failure as a parent, a husband, a neighbor, fail to find the freedom and joy of retirement , BUT, as long as all your stuff shines you can feel good about yourself --- all because of us.

On the economic front, you spend more money on cleaning solvents, soap, wire brushes, etc. We hold up our end at a higher level, forced to buy new things, the old ones fall into disuse because of deferred maintenance. In fact, we are more likely to have two of the same tools; neither one works well because they are rusty -- you have only purchased one and it still shines -- there's a whole world of merchandising out there that we alone created. We are undoubtedly the inspiration for all "two for one", "buy one, get one free", and "bonus" sales.

So there you have it. Our sanity is intact, our leisure hours are each, a full sixty minutes. Our knives are not quite as sharp as yours but can cut bait and line. We'll thank you to remember that, if and when your frustrations overboil. You couldn't mount much of an organized military campaign against us -- too busy putting everything in slots, neat little rows, codifying, color-coding, sealing, establishing re-order protocols.

As a piece of friendly advice, (long overdue, if you ask me), when you have everything you own sealed, tagged, filed and lined up; when you can't find one more solitary thing that needs de-rusting, painting or polishing, when your anxiety is at it's all-time peak, spill a little something on the floor (some blood from a big old marlin, if you've got it).....then just leave it.

woody with a view - 11-13-2012 at 07:53 AM

couldn't have said it better, literally! a few scrapes and old scars add character. :light:

dtbushpilot - 11-13-2012 at 07:55 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Osprey
Coming Clean

"As a piece of friendly advice, (long overdue, if you ask me), when you have everything you own sealed, tagged, filed and lined up; when you can't find one more solitary thing that needs de-rusting, painting or polishing, when your anxiety is at it's all-time peak, spill a little something on the floor (some blood from a big old marlin, if you've got it).....then just leave it."

Or, better yet, you could come over and clean the rust off my boat :lol:

Skipjack Joe - 11-13-2012 at 08:16 AM

I suppose there are varying gradations of these people. Some don't just look down on you but fly into a rage over untidiness.

They also seem to love the business of recycling. All matter is broken down into piles and stowed in the garage for weeks or months.

All closet space is filled to the ceiling with boxes organized in some manner. Boxes that are never again opened. They're often hoarders as well. The 2 mental illnesses seem to go hand in hand.

They often have numerous allergies as well. The Felix Ungers of our planet. I believe the leading character in the television series "Monk" has even won awards portraying these people.

Pescador - 11-13-2012 at 08:19 AM

Rust on the boat is a little like the smile lines under the eyes. It shows that you have really been there and done that. John Wayne had a word for guys with clean boats, "Pilgrim".

J.P. - 11-13-2012 at 08:36 AM

A clean Boat ,Car or Garage is the sign of a sick mind. :lol:

brewer - 11-13-2012 at 08:39 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by J.P.
A clean Boat ,Car or Garage is the sign of a sick mind. :lol:

Russ - 11-13-2012 at 08:47 AM

I'm not sure being obsessive-compulsive is so bad. I just don't have the energy or motivation to take care of even the basics. I mean I do clean the toilet bowl and dishes but I just can't get around to sweeping or dusting. What ever those are? I really appreciate those that have too much energy. They are the first ones to give a helping hand with projects or emergencies. My place isn't called "The Cave" because I'm a neat freak. And I love to visit really clean boats. I just don't want to be on the detail crew. Another problem I find more and more often is I go to get something and end up staring at the wall trying to figure out what the hell I'm looking for and just start another project but forget what I'm suppose to do. That goes on all day and I'll be damned if I can remember if I have done anything at days end :?:

Osprey - 11-13-2012 at 08:52 AM

Russ, you did it. It's all done, finished. You deserve a cold one in the hammock.

vandenberg - 11-13-2012 at 10:02 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Osprey
Russ, you did it. It's all done, finished. You deserve a cold one in the hammock.

....and once you're in that hammock, it'll come to you.. So, you do it tomorrow. :biggrin:

some folks

captkw - 11-13-2012 at 10:10 AM

four maybe three years a go I get call from such a guy!! he is one of those types that will drive 100 miles to save a buck !! anyway he had a awsome deal on a like brand new boat (14hrs) so I checked out and said "buy it" so he bought it ... a week later I install a radar/gps/chartplotter and was about to drill some holes for the units "head" and he has a hissy about drilling a hole in his new boat and proceded to duct tape the head to the helm !! then we meet at the ramp for test ride and and he screams that my dogs can't go becasuse there claws will scratch the awlgrip !!!! needless to say..I will not work for that wingnut !! K&T ps the duct tape is still there !!

de.bump..no mas on this ??

captkw - 11-13-2012 at 08:32 PM

????? Osprey,,going on a tear !! LOL..more ..please !! PS..I think this way !! no dings,scuff marks..your not using it !! :lol:

[Edited on 11-14-2012 by captkw]

watizname - 11-14-2012 at 09:45 AM

As I finish a project, the stuff, tools and such just go on the workbench. The piles just seem to get deeper and deeper, but I know exactly where everything is, and can go straight to it or even describe to someone else where it is to be found. Then comes the day when nothing else will fit on the bench, and after a couple of weeks of putting off the cleanup, I sort thru the stuff, organize, and put everything "away". During this process, I usually throw away something that was near the bottom, that I haven't used in probably years. It only takes about two weeks before I'm onto another project, and can't find the tools I need, have to search for the "away" tools, and finally discover that the thing I thru out is exactly what I need, and have to run to Ace Hardware or HD or Lowes to get another. :cool:

witzizname

captkw - 11-14-2012 at 10:23 AM

Aint that the truth !! hang on to something for 10 years,, then you toss it and the next day you brother inlaw is looking for what you just tossed !!! Life is funny that way !!! K&T :cool:

watizname - 11-15-2012 at 08:54 AM

YUP

Bajagato - 11-15-2012 at 09:07 AM

I love this post. Thanks!