Your lizard is a "Collared Lizard", my all-time fave.... and sorry, Vandy; it's a male. Of course, it still gives you an in for another cheap shot at
the next POTUS.
Collared lizards are very aggressive; they will bite. In the small town of Bluff, Utah a young school kid brought one for show-and-tell, and a little
girl wanted to give it a 'kiss'.... bad idea. it latched on to her nose, and all holy hell pandemonium broke loose in the classroom for about 10
minutes until the teacher got it off her schnozola and calmed everyone else down. The teacher asked, "What did we learn from this?" and the little
victim (not the lizard) said, "I'm NEVER gonna kiss another LIZARD!! "
I was called out on the res on an ambulance call for an 8-y.o. Navajo boy who'd been bitten. It was my first 'assessment' after graduating.... we
arrived to find the boy with a whole t-shirt wrapped around his finger, and the family produced the collared lizard in a shoe-box, well-dispatched
with stones, poor little feller. I unwrapped the boys' hand, and found indentation marks on the nose-picker-finger; hadn't even broken the skin......
seein's as how THEY DON'T HAVE TEETH. I turned to my supervisor and whispered, "You gotta be chittin' me!". She being a kindergarten teacher
proceeded to alcohol-wipe the dented finger, and place a shiny kiddy-Band-Aid on, and all was well, except for poor Igor.
From then on, I was teased as 'Dinosaur Man'. Loved it. |