BajaNomad

Coming Clean

Osprey - 10-28-2016 at 01:07 PM

This is for Fishbuck.

Coming Clean




It won't be necessary to name names. You know who you are. We sure as hell know who you are; we know everything about you. Perhaps this is the perfect time for somebody to speak up, tell the truth, even if it hurts.

We see the silent little shudders you make when you see beach sand all over the bottom of our boats. We feel the hair going up on your neck when you spy some dried fish blood on the transom that somebody missed. You feel so superior when you notice that some of our rods, reels show some corrosion.

It's the same way at the house, the garage, when you look at our tools, our yard, trucks, and cars. That sort of "isn't that awful" look and posture of disdain. You can't help it. You can't help being neat, fastidious any more than you can keep from breathing. Some of you may even think being neat is a kind of "manly" thing. Most of us think it's a feminine trait; we see you as being sensitive and subjective, sometimes judgmental. Usually you're quiet about your disrespect, your pity.

You hate us. Admit it, you think we're "slobs". You're thinking "that guy really doesn't care about his equipment/truck/fishing gear. Maybe he doesn't even see the dirt, the rust. Maybe to him it's invisible. God, I couldn't live like that."

We are Hate Free. We exist to make you feel superior. And we DO know the difference, we see everything. We just don't go all to pieces about it. We see it. That black/purple spot in the bed of my truck is some marlin blood from a big striper I caught two years ago. Oh, I could really get down, pick at it, scrape it up but I haven't because when I see it I can almost relive the day. There's a little black thing that looks like part of a big spring lodged in the hinge of the tailgate of the old Ford. It's not a piece of metal, it's part of a tentacle of the biggest damned squid I ever caught; more than six feet long, probably 70 pounds; 1997 or 98 I think it was. These are not just spots, they're memory markers....wash them away and you lose all the precious memories of the adventure.

While you're watching the DIY channel on TV, we're watching Offshore Saltwater Adventures. While we're kickin back, relaxing, you're on a tear. You have somehow hooked your self-esteem up to just how clean and neat your things are, your life is. You hustle about keeping things shipshape still carrying all that hate, disdain around with you.

All your spotless trucks (you washed the paint off them), your polished reels, gleaming lacquered rods, your shining boats and motors set us apart, draw a deep line in the sand that you can feel good about. You can fail in business, be a failure as a parent, a husband, a neighbor, fail to find the freedom and joy of retirement, BUT, as long as all your stuff shines you can feel good about yourself --- all because of us.


On the economic front, you spend more money on cleaning solvents, soap, wire brushes, etc. We hold up our end at a higher level, forced to buy new things, the old ones fall into disuse because of deferred maintenance. In fact, we are more likely to have two of the same tools; neither one works well because they are rusty -- you have only purchased one and it still shines -- there's a whole world of merchandising out there that we alone created. We are undoubtedly the inspiration for all "two for one", "buy one, get one free", and "bonus" sales.

So there you have it. Our sanity is intact, our leisure hours are each, a full sixty minutes. Our knives are not quite as sharp as yours but can cut bait and line. We'll thank you to remember that, if and when your frustrations overboil. You couldn't mount much of an organized military campaign against us -- too busy putting everything in slots, neat little rows, codifying, color-coding, sealing, establishing re-order protocols.

As a piece of friendly advice, (long overdue, if you ask me), when you have everything you own sealed, tagged, filed and lined up; when you can't find one more solitary thing that needs de-rusting, painting or polishing, when your anxiety is at its all-time peak, spill a little something on the floor (some blood from a big old marlin, if you've got it).....then just leave it.

bledito - 10-28-2016 at 02:47 PM

Once apon a time I kept things neat, in place, clean. as I aged it mattered less. the only thing is that now it takes a bit longer to find what I need or I wind up buying anouther because I can't find it. It is always a surprise when it is found, an aha moment, there it is, a moment of joy. the neat freak never experiances this moment what a shame.

Martyman - 10-28-2016 at 03:32 PM

I laughed more than once reading your great story. I'm a slob too and now that I know the neat freaks need me to be a slob...I'll continue.

mtgoat666 - 10-28-2016 at 03:40 PM

Dont you hate it when other people leave the sink/counter full of dirty dishes?

cliffh - 10-28-2016 at 04:46 PM

I am voting for Osprey in Nov.

dizzyspots - 10-28-2016 at 05:11 PM

Thank you!

Barry A. - 10-28-2016 at 10:12 PM

LOL------some of you may never know the rapture we feel by keeping things repaired and in good condition, ready to go. But like you, we are happy, doing what we love to do. It takes all kinds to make the world of man go around. How boring if it was not so. :bounce:

24baja - 10-29-2016 at 06:18 AM

People look down their noses and act superior for many reasons, I think they are just unhappy and cant imagine why slobs like us are happy! Thanks Osprey

Lobsterman - 10-29-2016 at 06:25 AM

Quote: Originally posted by bledito  
Once apon a time I kept things neat, in place, clean. as I aged it mattered less. the only thing is that now it takes a bit longer to find what I need or I wind up buying anouther because I can't find it. It is always a surprise when it is found, an aha moment, there it is, a moment of joy. the neat freak never experiances this moment what a shame.


This fits me to a tee except I was never a "neat freak". I can not ever remember cleaning a reel or rod except with WD-40 and always put them away uncleaned or unwashed. Most just seem to work every time for my weekly ocean fishing adventures for the past 50 plus years. Some rods are missing eyelets but who really needs 10 eyelets on a 6' pole anyway? Some rod tips are taped on or glued on with JB Weld. The fish do not care if your tackle is in disrepair only the neat freak next to me does.

Also finding a treasure misplaced in my garage that has been missing for years is always a case for a good laugh. I either did not need it in the 1st place or just bought another one usually on EBay. Now I have a backup until I misplace the one I'm not using. This scenario seems to repeat itself over and over again. I just plan on leaving my collection of stuff to the kids when I move on in this world any way. Let them shine them up if they care to.

Below is a sample of my collection of rods and reels, all this pile work just fine. I was also going to show you a large grocery bag of reels that have a problem or two (mainly TLDs 10, 15 and 20s) I was going to take to Squidco to refurbish a few years ago but I can not seems to locate them in the garage at the moment. I just take another reel off the good pile when one has a problem and add it to the grocery bag. Newells seem to be the most error free due to my years of misuse and abuse behavior.

Thanks for sharing your view of the world that mirrors the views of many others like me.


reels.jpg - 136kB rods.jpg - 130kB


[Edited on 10-29-2016 by Lobsterman]

Sweetwater - 10-29-2016 at 09:16 AM

Where is that confounded like button?
:cool:

Howard - 10-29-2016 at 09:30 AM

That does it! I am going to clean up my bodega. I know, I know I have been saying that for several years but I really mean it this time! I'll get to it as soon as I clean up my junk drawer.

When I do see an organized garage I get extremely jealous, make my vow to do it and you know the rest.....

BornFisher - 10-29-2016 at 10:00 AM

Just found one of my missing phone chargers a few minutes ago. It was the one I took out of my car and forgot. Had to replace it in Ridgecrest. So now I can account for 4 of them and only have one missing!!!

pauldavidmena - 10-29-2016 at 02:55 PM

I'm pretty tidy and organized most of the time, but I've noticed that I have a high tolerance for dust. In fact, I'll let dust accumulate to the point that I can no longer find the things that I've meticulously organized.

BajaBlanca - 10-29-2016 at 04:41 PM

I used to be a clean freak but those days are loooooooooooooong gone.

Been there, done that. I now let everything pile up and then one day as the spirit grabs me (or my mom comes to visit), I organize away for days.....and love the look while it lasts!

woody with a view - 10-29-2016 at 05:47 PM

Osprey, what gets me going is how everyone needs to know the latest details. I spend time in Baja to leave the 5th grade gossip behind, back in 5th grade! It must be traceable to human nature. That feeling of superiority. I know I'm guilty when it comes to surf, but I digress.

Thanks for the reminder!

Kgryfon - 10-29-2016 at 06:05 PM

Love this...

Lee - 10-30-2016 at 10:44 AM


Don't know anyone in either camp. Use to be neater than now and take longer getting around to things. Think people are in the middle. Not one extreme or the other. I wouldn't want to know, much less be around, either attitudes described in this story. I'll die O/C and obsess about fish gear and surfboards. Don't like it or got some judgment about it....... best to stear clear....

BajaDanD - 10-30-2016 at 06:40 PM

Don't look in my work van or my garage

Paulina - 10-30-2016 at 10:29 PM

My rule is, if people don't like what they see, they don't have to look twice.

P>*)))>{

Skipjack Joe - 10-30-2016 at 11:59 PM

My mother was a neat freak. She kept the house spic and span. We never appreciated that but now that I've left I do. I don't think she ever judged us (me and dad) or looked down upon us. I wish I had some of that gene in me and I've tried, but a mess doesn't bother me until it reaches a certain level.

Generally, though, I don't get along with super fussy people. They're often compulsive obsessive and sometimes have allergies. Writers have centered entire comedies around people with this personality type. The TV series 'Monk' has been a smash hit for years. And everyone loved Jack Lemmon as Felix Unger. Actually, that's the extreme of the spectrum.

They used to call people like that 'anal'. It's supposed to be a trait of the German people. The Italians are supposed to be slovenly. That's why the Germans held out for 5 years against the odds.

I'm straying ...

P.S. My mother lived to be 94 years old. At the end the arthritis was so bad that her fingers were like hooks and she walked stooped over. Yet when it was time to go to the dining hall she put on her lipstick and her jewelry and a scarf around her neck and walked out with her cane. The caretakers told me how impressed they were. People with this personality type are often very strong individuals IMO.

[Edited on 10-31-2016 by Skipjack Joe]

Barry A. - 10-31-2016 at 08:24 AM

Excellent comments, SkipJack!!! A well measured response, and I agree. It takes all kinds, and I like them all. :yes:

Udo - 10-31-2016 at 08:29 AM

The house fire took care of my neatly organized garage. It had a fishing section, hand tools organized, power tools arranged in order of use, wine in one area, tequila in another, gun cleaning products in another, spray chemicals, glues, even bunji cords were hung in order of length.
I would post some photos, but most of you would barf...I would barf nowadays.
I still remember those days, that was six years ago this December.
My new garage has no organization, stuff scattered on two large work benches (couldn't work on them if I had to).
The only part of me that has regressed is the organization of my cook books. Whatever the chef wants to prepare, the recipe is reachable in seconds.
My mother also lived to be 95.

George just had a recent birthday, I am soooo glad his mind is still young and active with topics such as "COMING CLEAN" are still fresh on his mind.

vandenberg - 10-31-2016 at 11:53 AM

Quote: Originally posted by Udo  

The only part of me that has regressed is the organization of my cook books. Whatever the chef wants to prepare, the recipe is reachable in seconds.



Used to have 2 full bookcases of cookbooks.

Now I find it easier to Google any recipe I'm interested in and get multiple choices by the best chefs