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Bob and Susan
Elite Nomad
Posts: 8813
Registered: 8-20-2003
Location: Mulege BCS on the BAY
Member Is Offline
Mood: Full Time Residents
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it's a buck fifty NOW!!!
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Festus
Junior Nomad
Posts: 52
Registered: 2-22-2008
Location: San Francisco
Member Is Offline
Mood: Inquisitive
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| Quote: | Originally posted by vgabndo
My favorite panhandler: The wifey was arriving at LAX and I stopped at a florist's shop on the way to pick her up. In the parking lot I got
button-holed, but the guys says I don't want a handout, but for a buck I'll tell you a joke. I paid, he did, I laughed my butt off. I still tell that
joke now and then. |
Vgabndo - do tell us the joke please.
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Pompano
Elite Nomad
Posts: 8194
Registered: 11-14-2004
Location: Bay of Conception and Up North
Member Is Offline
Mood: Optimistic
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While we are waiting for vagbndo's joke..here's a filler.
This was told by a member of the Lakota Souix Nation.
It was October and the Indians on a remote ND reservation asked their new Chief if the coming winter was going to be cold or mild. Since he was a
Chief in a modern society he had never been taught the old secrets. When he looked at the sky he couldn't tell what the winter was going to be like.
Nevertheless, to be on the safe side he told his tribe that the winter was indeed going to be cold and that the members of the village should collect
firewood to be prepared. But being a practical leader, after several days he got an idea. He went to the phone booth, called the National Weather
Service and asked, "Is the coming winter going to be cold?"
"It looks like this winter is going to be quite cold," the meteorologist at the weather service responded.
So the Chief went back to his people and told them to collect even more firewood in order to be prepared. A week later he called the National Weather
Service again. "Does it still look like it is going to be a very cold winter?"
"Yes," the man at National Weather Service again replied, "it's going to be a very cold winter."
The Chief again went back to his people and ordered them to collect every scrap of firewood they could find. Two weeks later the Chief called the
National Weather Service again. "Are you absolutely sure that the winter is going to be very cold?"
"Absolutely," the man replied. "It's looking more and more like it is going to be one of the coldest winters ever."
"How can you be so sure?" the Chief asked.
The weatherman replied, "The Indians are collecting firewood like crazy."
I do what the voices in my tackle box tell me.
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vgabndo
Ultra Nomad
Posts: 3461
Registered: 12-8-2003
Location: Mt. Shasta, CA
Member Is Offline
Mood: Checking-off my bucket list.
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OK...here it is.
A kind of scroungy looking guy rushes into a bar and shouts to the bartender:
GIVE ME FOURTEEN SHOTS OF TEQUILA AND MAKE IT QUICK.
The bartender hesitates, but is finally convinced by the customer and pours out 14 shots. The drinker starts pounding them down.
1....2....3....4....5
WHOA THE BARTENDER SAYS, TAKE IT EASY MAN, YOU'RE GOING TO KILL YOURSElf.
The customer keeps drinking.
6...7...8...
THE BARTENDER SAYS...WHAT'S THE MATTER WITH YOU?
The drinker says: YOU'D BE DRINKING LIKE THIS TOO IF YOU HAD WHAT I HAVE.
9...10...11...
THE BARTENDERS SAYS...WHAT DO YOU HAVE?
12...13...14
THE GUY SLAPS SEVERAL COINS ON THE BAR AND SAYS...
SEVENTY-FOUR CENTS.
I hope it was worth the wait......
Undoubtedly, there are people who cannot afford to give the anchor of sanity even the slightest tug. Sam Harris
"The situation is far too dire for pessimism."
Bill Kauth
Carl Sagan said, "We are a way for the cosmos to know itself."
PEACE, LOVE AND FISH TACOS
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Pompano
Elite Nomad
Posts: 8194
Registered: 11-14-2004
Location: Bay of Conception and Up North
Member Is Offline
Mood: Optimistic
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Yup, good one...I think I will drive over to Ana's and try that one on Zulema.
I do what the voices in my tackle box tell me.
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vgabndo
Ultra Nomad
Posts: 3461
Registered: 12-8-2003
Location: Mt. Shasta, CA
Member Is Offline
Mood: Checking-off my bucket list.
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Thanks Roger, I like yours too.
Undoubtedly, there are people who cannot afford to give the anchor of sanity even the slightest tug. Sam Harris
"The situation is far too dire for pessimism."
Bill Kauth
Carl Sagan said, "We are a way for the cosmos to know itself."
PEACE, LOVE AND FISH TACOS
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Lindalou
Senior Nomad
Posts: 623
Registered: 1-12-2004
Location: Punta Banda Baja
Member Is Offline
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| Quote: | Originally posted by Pompano
Yup, good one...I think I will drive over to Ana's and try that one on Zulema.
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Try it on Lupe that will be even more fun
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DENNIS
Platinum Nomad
Posts: 29510
Registered: 9-2-2006
Location: Punta Banda
Member Is Offline
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| Quote: | Originally posted by vgabndo
I hope it was worth the wait...... |
Well worth the wait. Thanks.
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Pompano
Elite Nomad
Posts: 8194
Registered: 11-14-2004
Location: Bay of Conception and Up North
Member Is Offline
Mood: Optimistic
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RichnLinda...I just came back from Ana's, but decided it was too early for tequila. Take it from me, 14 beers with a Mexican combo plate for lunch is
almost too filling....groan. Lupe says Hi...as does Marta.
I do what the voices in my tackle box tell me.
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Kell-Baja
Nomad
Posts: 360
Registered: 1-18-2003
Location: San Diego
Member Is Offline
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Great Joke.
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sylens
Senior Nomad
Posts: 584
Registered: 4-6-2005
Location: Ensenada
Member Is Offline
Mood: ando bajando
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both jokes
lol thigh slappers.
thanks
lili
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Oso
Ultra Nomad
Posts: 2637
Registered: 8-29-2003
Location: on da border
Member Is Offline
Mood: wait and see
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I have no set policy on panhandlers, it just depends on the moment. Years ago, my wife and I were approached on Market St. in SF by a typically
scroungy type with a bandage over one eye. He started off with a typical story, he was beaten and robbed by some guys, just got out of the
hospital... I started to roll my eyes, having heard it all before. Then he threw a curveball... said "I'm not hungry, but I sure could use a drink."
Gave him a buck.
All my childhood I wanted to be older. Now I\'m older and this chitn sucks.
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HCR
Junior Nomad
Posts: 47
Registered: 3-23-2008
Member Is Offline
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Every time I've given to a panhandler, I've felt good about it because I was reminded to be grateful that the roles were not reversed.
Use it up, wear it out, make do, or do without.
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