Gypsy Jan
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The World's Best Guide to Buying Tequila That Doesn't Suck
From The OC Weekly
By Dave Lieberman
http://blogs.ocweekly.com/stickaforkinit/2013/01/guide_to_bu...
"I'm a liquor store yenta. That's right; if I see you picking up one of those neon green bottles of margarita mix, or God forbid the bilious-looking
pee-yellow bottle with the Cuervo garbage already mixed in, I will come over and strike up and awkward conversation in which I try to convince you to
buy something better, because that stuff is a one-way ticket to a hangover.
The best is seeing people with a cart full of $35 vodka and $40 whiskey looking at José Cuervo Gold. Why not spend $3 more and get something better?
Did that Tracy Byrd song ("I went ten rounds with José Cuervo-o-o...") really have such an impact on you?
And another thing... why are you spending so much money on sipping tequila? Is it the Cristal effect, where the Don Julio and Patrón brands are the
"cool" brands, so it's worth paying $50 for a fifth of tequila that half the bars in America serve ice cold anyway?
It's a nationwide epidemic, this affinity for bad or overpriced tequila, and it's time for it to stop. Read on for my opinionated, completely unbiased
opinion after two decades drinking tequila here and in Mexico. Don't like it? Tell me what a pendejo I am in the comments--but show your work and
leave your own suggestions!
1. If it comes in a pretty or interesting bottle, it's generally mediocre
If you're thinking about buying of those fugly glass monstrosities in the shape of a gun, a cactus, a woman with enormous breasts, or whatever, just
stop. Go buy a bottle of La Cofradia tequila instead, because it's cheaper and it's the same tequila--they all come from La Cofradia. One of the best
tequilas for mixed drinks, Tequila Tapatío, comes in a plain bottle that could just as easily have housed rum, Scotch, or wine. My house tequila,
Volcán de Mi Tierra, comes in a similarly plain bottle. Cuánto más se ve fresa, menos me interesa. The fancier it looks, the less it interests me.
2. If it's "created by" or linked to a celebrity, it may be good, but it's almost certainly overpriced. It may also be rascuache--crap
"There are huge advertising budgets only when there's no difference between the products. If the products really were different, people would buy the
one that's better. Advertising teaches people not to trust their judgment. Advertising teaches people to be stupid." --Carl Sagan, Contact
Cabo Wabo tequila is massively popular because Sammy Hagar is affiliated with it, not because it's any good; Xzibit flogs Tequila Bonita, which every
Spanish speaker knows is bogus, because it should be Tequila Bonito (it's el tequila). And then there's Daddy Yankee, who wins the Pendejo Tequilero
award for lending his name to a tequila called El Cartel, made by the same distillery as the overpriced Avión. Celebrities are famous for not having
any taste--have you seen Keeping Up With the Kardashians?--and so choosing your tequila based on who flogs it is just idiotic.
3. If it's not 100% de agave, leave it for the frat boys.
It gets wearisome beating this drum, but I'll say it once again: every percentage of tequila that is not made from Agave tequilana Weber is a
percentage that might as well be cat pee. It isn't, of course--it's usually cane alcohol, which has its own uses (mmmm, pajaretes...), but it makes
for a harsh tequila that hits you with all the subtlety of a Warner Bros. anvil to the head. Make sure it says "100% de agave". Don't worry about
whether it says blue agave, because it can't be called tequila unless it's made from blue agave.
4. Añejo does not mean "best"; it means "oldest"
The indicators of age are just that: how long it spent in the oak barricas before being poured out and bottled. Some places, like Cazadores, make good
reposado and just okay añejo; some places, like Fortaleza, make an amazing blanco that gets overwhelmed by the wood taste of aging. The prices are
always higher for the older tequilas because there's less añejo than reposado, and less reposado than blanco. Which brings us to...
5. Price is not a good indicator of quality
"You get what you pay for." If you hear someone say that about tequila, tell him he's telling you pendejadas. Many of the best tequilas in the world,
particularly reposados, retail for $20-$30 per 750 mL bottle. Are there expensive tequilas out there that are worth it?
Absolutely... but just because it's got a nice elegant bottle doesn't mean it's worth the money. In fact, some of the expensive tequilas come from
distilleries where they make cheaper brands--and they all come from the same tanks.
So what should I buy?
First of all, the only thing worth buying with the name Cuervo on it is Reserva de la Familia, and even then, there are better tequilas out there.
Second, the Sauza family doesn't own the Sauza brand anymore; it was sold off two generations ago, and the fifth and sixth generations of the Sauzas
now make tequila under the Fortaleza distillery (you may see some old Mexican bottles that say Los Abuelos--it's the same exact tequila).
Second, no matter how desperate you are for a tequila bender, do not ever, ever, ever buy Montezuma Tequila. While expensive tequilas are not
necessary good ones, extremely cheap tequilas are nearly always bad ones. You have been warned.
Third, never buy tequila that doesn't come in glass. There are plenty of beehive-shaped five-liter plastic jugs of yellow liquor that is technically
tequila, but it is all garbage--don't be tempted.
Now, on to specific recommendations:
If all you can get is nationally distributed brands, because you live far from the border or in one of those ridiculous liquor control states like
Oregon and Pennsylvania, drink Corralejo. If you can't get that, stick with Espolón or El Jimador. If you can only get Cuervo and Sauza, Sauza's Tres
Generaciones is your best option.
If you're looking for bargains and you live in Southern California or Texas, try La Puerta Negra reposado; if you're going to Mexico, come back with a
bottle of Volcán de Mi Tierra reposado. If you're out and about in the rest of the country, Camarena makes a good margarita or paloma.
Nice mid-range tequilas, meant for sipping rather than shooting, include Real de México, Tapatío, Cazadores, and--even though opening the oddly shaped
bottle feels like performing a glass circumcision--Asombroso.
If you've got to impress someone, skip the so-mediocre Patrón and the shockingly overpriced Don Julio; go get a bottle of Arette añejo. You may change
people's minds about tequila just with this one bottle, and it's less expensive than Don Julio. Also worth buying are Fortaleza (particularly the
blanco, which will blow your mind with its almost grassy agave taste) and Siete Leguas.
Are these all the good ones? Not a chance. If you're ever in Tijuana, you need to stop at Leyva's Liquors on Avenida Revolución between 6th and 7th
and put yourself in Gilberto Leyva's capable hands and his 600-brand hoard of tequila.
Finally, please, enough with this lick-sip-suck business. Lime and salt are there for when you need to cover the noxious aftertaste of poor-quality
tequila or you need to counter the shock of taking a whole shot at once. Go for some sangrita instead--usually made with equal parts tomato and orange
juice, with lime juice and chile powder or hot sauce to give it a little zing. You can buy sangrita as well, but be aware that the most popular brand
both here and in Mexico, Viuda de Sánchez, is not exactly made from whole ingredients. It's worth making your own. Sip your tequila, then sip your
sangrita. Alternate until it's time to refill. ¡Salud!"
“Travel is fatal to prejudice, bigotry, and narrow mindedness.”
—Mark Twain
\"La vida es dura, el corazon es puro, y cantamos hasta la madrugada.” (Life is hard, the heart is pure and we sing until dawn.)
—Kirsty MacColl, Mambo de la Luna
\"Alea iacta est.\"
—Julius Caesar
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DavidE
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Or my stuff hidden away in Lazaro Card##as. Grin.
A Lot To See And A Lot To Do
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Marinero
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MMMMM, glad it's 5:00 pm. I'm heading for the liquor cabinet for some sippin tequila...
Si estás buscando la person que cambiará su vida, échale una mirada en el espejo.
Fish logo from www.usafishing.com, used w/permission.
But Oz never did give nothing to the Tin Man
That he didn't, didn't already have..... |
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Marinero
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Oh, and the salt and lime are truly "Training Wheels".
Si estás buscando la person que cambiará su vida, échale una mirada en el espejo.
Fish logo from www.usafishing.com, used w/permission.
But Oz never did give nothing to the Tin Man
That he didn't, didn't already have..... |
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ligui
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Thanks Jan that was really good info ,and also well written , thanks again looking forward trying your tequila choices .
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El Jefe
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Everybody has an opinion on this for sure. For sipping I like the Kirkland Anejo straight on the rocks. Kind of like a cross between tequila and
whiskey.
In margs we use El Capricho Elixir de Agave, also available at Costco in Cabo for 92 pesos. Nowhere on the bottle does it say tequila, but I can't
tell the difference in a mixed drink. And NOBODY has ever complained about my margaritas, except for the fact that two will kick their ass.
No b-tchin\' in the Baja.
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durrelllrobert
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When I toured the Sauza distillery in the town of Tequilla the process of roasting the agave centers and then pressing out the liquid for fermentation
was facinating.
The first pressing went into their own fermentation tanks, the liquid from the second pressing was sent to the El Jimador distillery and the third
pressing went to Jose Cuervo. I asume that there is some difference in the liquid from each pressing?
Bob Durrell
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David K
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The tequila tastings we did after the Book Signings (at Keri's Pyramid Resort, La Mision) were good fun... GeoRock usually headed the event...
In 2007:
In 2004:
In 2003:
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Sweetwater
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Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm........Tequila................
Everbody\'s preachin\' at me that we all wanna git to heaven, trouble is, nobody wants to die to git there.-BB King
Reality is what does not go away when you stop believing in it. -Philip K Dick
Nothing is worse than active ignorance. Johann Wolfgang von Goethe(1749-1832, German writer, artist and politician)
When choosing between two evils, I always like to try the one I\'ve never tried before. - Mae West
Experience is what keeps a man who makes the same mistake twice from admitting it the third time around.
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capt. mike
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fishbuck sure liked the T contest!!
formerly Ordained in Rev. Ewing\'s Church by Mail - busted on tax fraud.......
Now joined L. Ron Hoover\'s church of Appliantology
\"Remember there is a big difference between kneeling down and bending over....\"
www.facebook.com/michael.l.goering |
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capt. mike
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dill pickle juice as a chase is pretty good even with good qual T.
i am surprized they missed Sausa's Azul reposado. great at under $20 often here. My current fav for keeping in the freezer.
formerly Ordained in Rev. Ewing\'s Church by Mail - busted on tax fraud.......
Now joined L. Ron Hoover\'s church of Appliantology
\"Remember there is a big difference between kneeling down and bending over....\"
www.facebook.com/michael.l.goering |
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Retireded
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After reading , I went and bought a bottle of Cazadores. Good Sippin'
I tended bar up in Wa state, and didn't find any that tasted really good. This stuff ain't half bad. I think I'll sip a little more.
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Udo
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My favorite inexpensive tequila just as a drink with some lime is El Charro, and my Favorite sippin is 1942.
Udo
Youth is wasted on the young!
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Retireded
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No salt, No lime, No chaser. None needed. Beats Cuervo or Hornitos any day in my book.
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elgatoloco
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Jan, thanks for sharing that blog on tequila. Fun reading for sure. I am always interested in other opinions on the nectar of the gods. I have been
hearing about Leyva’s Liquors in TJ for years and still have not made it there. I need to get there soon for a look see, at least.
I too am a big fan of Don Julio 1942, it’s hard to beat. The only Cuervo product allowed in my house is the Reserva de La Familia. I started
collecting the different boxes they come in and have about 10, so far. A new sipper I recently was gifted is Corzo Añejo, triple distilled and very
smooth. It is made at the same distillery as Cazadores
El Diamante Del Cielo Añejo (triple distilled & aged 4 years) is a very nice sipper and comes in a cool bottle with a cork stopper and lariat
wrapped around the top. I was given a bottle some years back by a good friend and tequila aficionado like me. Looks great on my shelf with the rest of
my collection. A few years later I see at Costco the Kirkland Signature Tequila Añejo (double distilled/California oak aged) and after investigating
find out that it is made at the same distillery as Cielo. My buddy said he would never drink costco tequila. We did a 'blind' taste test (I gave him a
shot and did not tell him what is was) and while it’s not quite as smooth as Cielo it’s a close match and at $22 for a liter is a VERY good value
IMHO.
My every day drinker is Gran Centenario Añejo (first place winner at book signing tasting multiple years). When I first discovered this tequila it was
$69.00 at Bev Mo if they had it in stock. I would buy it at La Playa in TJ for $19.00. Fast forward ten years and now it’s $30.00 at Bev Mo but I
still buy it in Baja, mostly shopping at Don Pisto in Puerto Nuevo to save the TJ traffic hassle. We never cross northbound without a couple of
bottles and I use them as gifts of appreciation to customers and folks I work with back in Minnesota, North Dakota, Iowa and New Hampshire and the
like where they can’t just head down to the corner liquor store and find it, at least not yet. It helps that it comes in a nice round ‘box’ that helps
with shipping. It also makes for a nice introductory sipper for newbies who might think that Cuervo Gold is all that.
Got Tequila?
MAGA
Making Attorneys Get Attorneys
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bajaguy
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| Quote: | Originally posted by El Jefe
In margs we use El Capricho Elixir de Agave, also available at Costco in Cabo for 92 pesos. Nowhere on the bottle does it say tequila, but I can't
tell the difference in a mixed drink. And NOBODY has ever complained about my margaritas, except for the fact that two will kick their burro.
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This ^....is great for sipping also!!!
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DENNIS
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I hate Tequila. Scotch and Corona beer too.
.
[Edited on 1-31-2013 by DENNIS]
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David K
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| Quote: | Originally posted by DENNIS
I hate Tequila. Scotch and Corona beer too.
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For the life of me, I can also not understand why Corona is so popular (of course I fail to understand the same about Budweiser in the States, too)!
El Gato Loco is a tequila expert indeed! Notice how he has mastered the sipping through a straw technique!
I remember how well Gran Centenario did at the Pyramid Resort tastings... it had the least 'gasoline kick' of them all!
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