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SlyOnce
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What was your "culture shock" in moving to Baja?
Hi, I live in Playas de TJ, in a very high end (but small) apartment on a hill overlooking the cuoata. I really love it here, last night for example
I was home from work in the US early, my lovely esposa made dinner, then we went to a park and played basketball until dark. After that we walked
around the park with dozens of couples and families, and stopped for a nieve (I had chocolate, lemon and mango - 3 scoops for 21 pesos). We went
home, watched a movie, and were in bed early.
Since Playas is so very similar to the US, especially latina communities like Chula Vista, you can hardly tell you are in MX.
But there has still been a little "culture shock" that required getting used to. For me:
(1) Getting used to MX drivers - at first it was really nerve racking driving around. It still is, but I'm more used to it.
(2) I used to do almost all food shopping on the US side, now 2 years later I do all food shopping on the MX side. I've gotten used to MX brands and
MX foods. At first I did almost all the cooking - gringo meals - and now my sweetheart does almost all the cooking - MX meals.
(3) Realization that there is no justice in MX, that the police are more evil than the thieves. While this is certainly not 100% true, it was a major
shock.
(4) realization that, in MX, women expect you to open the door for them and treat them like ladies and in fact the whole place is like the US was in
the 50s, kids play in the street after dinner and there are ice cream trucks and camote carts (yum). Not really a shock, this is one of the things I
love most about Playas.
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Lee
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Quote: Originally posted by SlyOnce  |
(4) realization that, in MX, women expect you to open the door for them and treat them like ladies and in fact the whole place is like the US was in
the 50s,...
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MX women are throwbacks to the 50s? I think some are caricatures of what they think MX men want. Probably gringoes too. Virgin in the
kitchen, **** in the bedroom.
Spaniards are backwards too. If that makes me racist, I'll work on it.
US Marines: providing enemies of America an opportunity to die for their country since 1775.
What I say before any important decision.
F*ck it.
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shari
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Location: bahia asuncion, baja sur
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Mood: there is no reality except the one contained within us "Herman Hesse"
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My biggest hurdle was accepting and adapting to the custom of not telling the truth but saying what the people THINK you want to hear....so now that I
know that people don't necessarily show up when they say they will...or things dont happen when they say they will....I just say...ni modo....oh well!
I actually kind of like as it's no problem if i dont show up on time or at all!
I also cant wear a bikini to a public beach here in Asuncion as everyone swims in shorts and a Tshirt...so we just go down the beach a bit to where
there is nobody. Women also arent supposed to hang out with the guys drinking beer at a party....we should be in the living room with all the
ladies...dang thats hard!
It is also forbidden for women to ride in a car with a man who isnt your husband or family...without a chaperone. Like Lee said...it is like stepping
into the past in the small villages.
I also couldnt figure out why women always went to the bathroom in two's and when an amiga asked me to go...I declined if I didnt have to pee...that
is a big cultural No No...and an insult. I learned why they do that is to guard the door...as many bathrooms dont have doors at all so your friend
stands in front of you to give you privacy...or the lock doesnt work...or she hands you toilet paper...or she is there to guard your back if there is
a fight in the bathroom...I know now there are lots of excellent reasons why one must always agree to accompany a friend to the bathroom!
When I first moved to Guerrero Negro...NO women drove so it was funny to see the men looking at me zooming around in my pick up...but things have
changed now in the last 20 years with the internet and TV...more contact with the outside world so I am not looked at like a Martian anymore!
[Edited on 8-19-2015 by shari]
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Sweetwater
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Mood: chilly today hot tomale
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| Quote: |
When I first moved to Guerrero Negro...NO women drove so it was funny to see the men looking at me zooming around in my pick up...but things have
changed now in the last 20 years with the internet and TV...more contact with the outside world so I am not looked at like a Martian anymore!
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The region I'm living in is suffering from the smoke from the Pacific NorthWest fires and we sat out last evening drinking a brew and glass of wine.
The discussion arrived at a parallel level when regional, ethnic and religious conflicts were discussed. With the world opening up to people via the
internet, it is easier than ever to contrast differences and particularly those differences in how children and women are treated. Yet, those same
social media and internet resources seem to be a vector to recruit others to a darker purpose. How can that be when the obvious benefits of freedom
and liberty are so obvious?
Good thread.....
Everbody\'s preachin\' at me that we all wanna git to heaven, trouble is, nobody wants to die to git there.-BB King
Reality is what does not go away when you stop believing in it. -Philip K Dick
Nothing is worse than active ignorance. Johann Wolfgang von Goethe(1749-1832, German writer, artist and politician)
When choosing between two evils, I always like to try the one I\'ve never tried before. - Mae West
Experience is what keeps a man who makes the same mistake twice from admitting it the third time around.
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Alm
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Probably the most americanized area of the most americanized state in the entire Mexico. I'm surprised people find any differences at all. Learning
food labels takes time, though.
Somebody up there was looking after Mexicans - they didn't have a feminist movement, not of the North American scale anyway.
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SlyOnce
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Its hard to tell the difference between Playas and Imperial Beach (CA) which is why I started this thread! Still, people drive like animals, and the
police are animals. And it's hard to find US brand foods. But I'm interested in culture shock items for those who have moved farther south, since I
plan to consider that.
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Whale-ista
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Good question Sly. I asked a similar one a few months ago. Received some thoughtful replies from friends in Baja Sur.
http://forums.bajanomad.com/viewthread.php?tid=78578
Having lived in Ensenada, and having family there as well as in Mexicali, I remember the challenges of transition. It was definitely helped by family,
and the ease of returning NOB within an hour. But as I consider living a longer distance from the border I wanted to hear from others also.
And re: "gender customs"- in my experience, what's more common in Baja is a mutual respect/admiration between the sexes. Men open doors etc., women
manage the home, cooking etc. in ways that are not always common in the US. It's called "courtesy." Or maybe "traditional family values."
I have learned to appreciate the basic courtesies extended by men to women, and women to men, in traditional Mexican culture. It's not about feminism
(which I consider simply all people being treated equally)- it's about traditional culture, respect and custom.
And as Shari notes- the "custom" of women interacting primarily with women at social events, and not driving with men who are not their family/spouse,
etc. was very common in my family when I was growing up and visiting SOB, but has changed over time (at least up north). Now, more women attend
college/university, and are working professionals as well as moms and homemakers. They contribute financially to their homes and families, as well as
by tending the house.
Thanks for continuing the discussion. Good idea to be prepared for "culture shock" before moving to any new place.
\"Probably the airplanes will bring week-enders from Los Angeles before long, and the beautiful poor bedraggled old town will bloom with a
Floridian ugliness.\" (John Steinbeck, 1940, discussing the future of La Paz, BCS, Mexico)
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Whale-ista
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Thanks for this ^^
This is a much better description of the "courtesy" I was trying to describe. Sometimes it's genuine, sometimes it's totally faux, but as we say in
US: "good manners are the social lubricant of society" .... or something like that. They help reduce the frictions/tensions that can develop between
people.
\"Probably the airplanes will bring week-enders from Los Angeles before long, and the beautiful poor bedraggled old town will bloom with a
Floridian ugliness.\" (John Steinbeck, 1940, discussing the future of La Paz, BCS, Mexico)
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David K
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Frank, is there a different handshake in Baja vs. the mainland?
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Pescador
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I live half way down the peninsula in a small fishing village which is entirely different than Ensenada and North. The best info I ever found comes
from a helpful book available from Amazon and other places.
The Mexican Mind!: Understanding & Appreciating Mexican Culture! Paperback – December 10, 2011
by Boye Lafayette De Mente (Author)
16 customer reviews
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bezzell
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.... how the vast majority of gringos really are the ultimate pendejos (some with bolt cutters!)
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willyAirstream
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http://www.amazon.com/MEXICAN-MIND-Understanding-Appreciatin...
Kindle edition 3.79
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SlyOnce
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I've noticed they call a black person, black, a white guero or gringo, an asian el chino all with no apparent prejudice. While there are strong
economic class distinctions, they don't seem to be based on color.
I can't be offended at hearing myself referred to as guero, gringo, Rubio or similar.
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David K
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We go to Mexico because it is DIFFERENT than here.
WHY do some go there, then want to make it the SAME as the place they left?
Why leave the U.S. if that's what they like?
Maybe these Mexicans mentioned are not PC (politically correct) because they are adults and name calling doesn't ruin their day, make them cry, or
create money for lawyers and politicians?
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motoged
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| Quote: Originally posted by soulpatch |
One I am still dealing with..... the chilango handshake..... soft as a feather.
I am no hand crusher by any means but I usually give a firm handshake..... |
Such a gentle handshake is not only a Mexico City thing (Chilango)....is is most common in many cultures around the world...and in my travels in
Mexico, Central America, and amongst north American indigenous peoples...
I first learned this in Canada when working on a local reserve....and found it to be true in my travels....so....it's the way I shake hands when in
such situations...
[Edited on 8-20-2015 by motoged]
Don't believe everything you think....
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Osprey
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Nothing much changed for me. I hate black people. I hate white people. I don't know any Asians and brown people, Mexicans, have shown me respect, a
kind of reverence almost for my lack of understanding, guile and of course, my age.
The only thing in the states that even comes close to that is a southern custom: If a southerner sees me spilling julip down my shirt front they would
say "Well, bless his heart."
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Alm
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| Quote: Originally posted by David K | We go to Mexico because it is DIFFERENT than here.
WHY do some go there, then want to make it the SAME as the place they left?
Why leave the U.S. if that's what they like?
Maybe these Mexicans mentioned are not PC (politically correct) because they are adults and name calling doesn't ruin their day, make them cry, or
create money for lawyers and politicians? |
All good points (or questions).
And, - not the best title for the topic, IMO. Talking about any kind of "shock" in the region mentioned above would be an exaggeration. It's a border
town, after all. Driving habits is perhaps the only thing that stands out - but then, with road conditions and signage being not the same as in the
US, one would expect different driving habits as well.
Feminism is about treating both genders equal? You can't treat as totally equal two things that are different, by definition. Trying to do this
would result in a whole cr-p load of PC that we are witnessing NOB. What we see in Mexico on this issue, is not a "shock", it is "normal". Though,
normal can be a shock to people that have never seen it before, in other countries. I can understand this. Try traveling around more, fellow
Americans.
[Edited on 8-20-2015 by Alm]
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Osprey
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Yes ma'am, travel. That's the ticket. We'll get right on it. Where would you suggest we start? You have an itinerary for us perhaps?
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sancho
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This thread has a nice tone to it.
Travel, at least extensively, is a luxury in $ and time, I never had kids which allowed me to do a few walk abouts in Central America, Mex, back when
a
when a room in Guatamala was $1.50. Don't see where family,
middle class US Gringos have the time/ $ to pursue travel.
I did feel a little sheltered meeting Euros with 4 languages
under their belt, or one guy from Belgium who was in his
7th yr going around the world
[Edited on 8-20-2015 by sancho]
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Whale-ista
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As Mark Twain said, "Travel is fatal to prejudice, bigotry, and narrow-mindedness."
\"Probably the airplanes will bring week-enders from Los Angeles before long, and the beautiful poor bedraggled old town will bloom with a
Floridian ugliness.\" (John Steinbeck, 1940, discussing the future of La Paz, BCS, Mexico)
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