Pompano
Elite Nomad
Posts: 8194
Registered: 11-14-2004
Location: Bay of Conception and Up North
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Mood: Optimistic
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Pirates of the Cortez - The fun truth, by Gar!
From a pirate about to engage two enemy ships:
"Fetch me red shirt!" ...the mate asks why...
.. and pirate says 'so the men will be not be alarmed and stray from the fight should I shed any blood.'
Days later surrounded by an menacing enemy fleet closing fast, the same pirate yells to his mate:
"Fetch me brown pants!"
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Alternate Signature: “I only exaggerate enough to compensate for being taken with a grain of salt.”
[Edited on 3-28-2012 by Pompano]
I do what the voices in my tackle box tell me.
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acadist
Super Nomad
Posts: 1125
Registered: 3-31-2007
Location: Spanaway,WA
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Mood: Waiting for the Sun
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Dave
I moved to CO and they made me buy a little rod to make it feel like a real fish
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Udo
Elite Nomad
Posts: 6364
Registered: 4-26-2008
Location: Black Hills, SD/Ensenada/San Felipe
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Mood: TEQUILA!
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Udo
Youth is wasted on the young!
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Sallysouth
Super Nomad
Posts: 1835
Registered: 10-9-2003
Location: Capo Beach
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Mood: missing Baja...
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Jeezo Roger, Can you be any more entertaining ? Thanks for the belly laugh, I really need them theses days! AARRRGH!(think tidy wipes UDO)
Happiness is just a Baja memory away...
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BajaBlanca
Select Nomad
Posts: 13237
Registered: 10-28-2008
Location: La Bocana, BCS
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very funny !
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El Camote
Senior Nomad
Posts: 514
Registered: 9-7-2003
Location: Above the clouds
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Mood: y Blues
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Reminds me of the Nomad retiree that goes for his annual physical exam. The Doc asks him for a urine specimen, a stool sample and a sperm sample.
The Nomad says, "Doc, I'm in a hurry to get to happy hour, can't I just leave you my boxers?"
Knowledge is good. - Emil Faber
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Pompano
Elite Nomad
Posts: 8194
Registered: 11-14-2004
Location: Bay of Conception and Up North
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Mood: Optimistic
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Shiver me timbers, el Camote...I'm gonna drag this thread out of the ship's head, so help me!
A pirate walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Hey, I haven't seen you in a while. What happened, you look terrible!"
"What do you mean?" the pirate replies, "I'm fine."
The bartender says, "But what about that wooden leg? You didn't have that before."
"Well," says the pirate, "We were in a battle at sea and a cannon ball hit my leg but the surgeon fixed me up, and I'm fine, really."
"Yeah," says the bartender, "But what about that hook? Last time I saw you, you had both hands."
"Well," says the pirate, "We were in another battle and we boarded the enemy ship. I was in a sword fight and my hand was cut off but the surgeon
fixed me up with this hook, and I feel great, really."
"Oh," says the bartender, "What about that eye patch? Last time you were in here you had both eyes."
"Well," says the pirate, "One day when we were at sea, some birds were flying over the ship. I looked up, and one of them shat in my eye."
"So?" replied the bartender, "what happened? You couldn't have lost an eye just from some bird chit!"
"Well," says the pirate, "I really wasn't used to the hook yet."
I do what the voices in my tackle box tell me.
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capt. mike
Elite Nomad
Posts: 8085
Registered: 11-26-2002
Location: Bat Cave
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Mood: Sling time!
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anyone know why pirates wore an eye patch?
formerly Ordained in Rev. Ewing\'s Church by Mail - busted on tax fraud.......
Now joined L. Ron Hoover\'s church of Appliantology
\"Remember there is a big difference between kneeling down and bending over....\"
www.facebook.com/michael.l.goering |
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Barry A.
Select Nomad
Posts: 10007
Registered: 11-30-2003
Location: Redding, Northern CA
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Mood: optimistic
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Pirates live a tough life, Mike. Swinging on lanyards from ship to ship is hazardous to the eyes, apparently.
Barry
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lizard lips
Super Nomad
Posts: 1469
Registered: 8-30-2002
Location: EARTH
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RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!
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Barry A.
Select Nomad
Posts: 10007
Registered: 11-30-2003
Location: Redding, Northern CA
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Mood: optimistic
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| Quote: | Originally posted by lizard lips
RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR! |
I believe that is, ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!
(You left out the "A".)
barry
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El Camote
Senior Nomad
Posts: 514
Registered: 9-7-2003
Location: Above the clouds
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Mood: y Blues
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One theory for the eyepatch is not related to blindness. Below deck in the old pirate ships contained very few openings and was therefore very dark.
In order for the eyes to adjust quickly to the darkness, a patch was worn over one eye so that eye could be uncovered and was readily adjusted to the
darkness. I imagine they would switch the patch to the daylight eye when going below so they'd have an adjusted eye for going back on deck. 
And don't forget, September 19 is Intl. Talk Like a Pirate Day. Arrrrrrrrrrr.
Knowledge is good. - Emil Faber
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capt. mike
Elite Nomad
Posts: 8085
Registered: 11-26-2002
Location: Bat Cave
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Mood: Sling time!
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El Camote has it right!
formerly Ordained in Rev. Ewing\'s Church by Mail - busted on tax fraud.......
Now joined L. Ron Hoover\'s church of Appliantology
\"Remember there is a big difference between kneeling down and bending over....\"
www.facebook.com/michael.l.goering |
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Wingnut
Nomad
Posts: 171
Registered: 5-5-2007
Location: Phoenix, AZ
Member Is Offline
Mood: Baja Pensive
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Arrrrrrhahahahaha ARRRRGGGHHHHHH
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