| Pages:
1
2 |
Osprey
Ultra Nomad
Posts: 3694
Registered: 5-23-2004
Location: Baja Ca. Sur
Member Is Offline
|
|
Don't anger the Wind Gods
Hurricane Henriette
Dear Lowlife Cabeño (for the Spanish challenged, a resident of Cabo San Lucas, Mexico),
I don’t know what you did or who you did it to but your transgressions have incurred the wrath of the wind gods. While they visit upon you
appropriate avengement they inadvertently cause serious collateral damage.
For this reason we demand you remove yourself from this place, return to Weaselbreath, Arkansas for the balance of your punishment and leave us what’s
left of our erstwhile Eden.
In the last couple of summer season you have brought down upon us unspeakable destruction from a chilling chain of storms such as Ignacio, Marty and
John. Even now we suffer through another direct hit tempest named Henriette. While Henriette carries half the force of some powerhouse tempests, it
is dropping an inch of rain each hour, turning timid arroyos into raging copper-stained rivers.
I am not a bystander; like thousands of others I have been frantically moving about for two solid days and nights doing all the hundred and one things
necessary to protect property, people and pets from the awesome power of wind and water.
It is 11:32 AM – the wind and rain began ten hours ago and may not abate for another eight hours (one storm, Ignacio stalled and punished us for 50
straight hours).
My wife and I choose to pass the storm right here on my outside patio under the palm palapa which has held up admirably for twelve years in this
stormy corridor. We lost power at 8:00 AM – it usually takes several days for it to be restored, during which time our lives are changed to mimic
those who once lived in caves or wikiups. I mean my forebears no dishonor when I say the bucolic lifestyle is dull and arduous.
Our patio is surrounded by a tropical jungle of greenery – I watch the grinding wind bend and brake and ruin the delicate platano de jardin, shred and
flatten an emerald hummock of luxuriant heliconium, defoliate the resilient plumeria, denude the fragile limbs of the flamboyant, the Tree of Fire. A
latte river runs down the dirt street at our gate, forming a lake on the bajada near the beach. We can see powerlines snap and arc but the whipcrack
sound is lost in the howls and susserations of the terrible wind.
We hold hands in a tacit vow of partnership; we’ll need all our strength when the storm abates. We will do whatever is necessary to mend our broken
trappings, our lives and our dreams.
And you, the one who caused all of this, I hope one of your timeshare gomers shakes your hand to thank you for the vacation-investment opportunity of
a lifetime, then passes on to your palm the rare and ravenous flesh-eating bacteria just before you step up on to the 10:30 Three-Star Aguila autobus
to Yuma.
|
|
|
capn.sharky
Senior Nomad
Posts: 686
Registered: 9-4-2003
Member Is Offline
|
|
I have heard of Bum---k, India....but Weaselbreath, Arkansas is a new one to me. Is land cheap there. Do the Clinton's live there part time? Que
Paso?
If there is no fishing in heaven, I am not going
|
|
|
Dave
Elite Nomad
Posts: 6005
Registered: 11-5-2002
Member Is Offline
|
|
What a dips---t!
| Quote: | Originally posted by capn.sharky
I have heard of Bum---k, India....but Weaselbreath, Arkansas is a new one to me. |
It's either Bum---k, Iowa or Idaho. I've heard there is also a Bum---k, Egypt but...who cares?
|
|
|
toneart
Ultra Nomad
Posts: 4901
Registered: 7-23-2006
Member Is Offline
Mood: Skeptical
|
|
I presume Osprey's piece is either fiction or was written Tuesday during Henriette. I hope that particular "lowlife Cabeno" is not still evoking the
wrath of Henriette reminants.
|
|
|
Don Alley
Super Nomad
Posts: 1997
Registered: 12-4-2003
Location: Loreto
Member Is Offline
|
|
| Quote: | Originally posted by Dave
| Quote: | Originally posted by capn.sharky
I have heard of Bum---k, India....but Weaselbreath, Arkansas is a new one to me. |
It's either Bum---k, Iowa or Idaho. I've heard there is also a Bum---k, Egypt but...who cares?
|
C'mon...no such place in Idaho.
But there is an Athol, Idaho.
|
|
|
Dave
Elite Nomad
Posts: 6005
Registered: 11-5-2002
Member Is Offline
|
|
Sure there is
| Quote: | Originally posted by Don Alley
C'mon...no such place in Idaho.
|
Just ask the Senior Senator from Midvale.
|
|
|
toneart
Ultra Nomad
Posts: 4901
Registered: 7-23-2006
Member Is Offline
Mood: Skeptical
|
|
| Quote: | Originally posted by Dave
| Quote: | Originally posted by Don Alley
C'mon...no such place in Idaho.
|
Just ask the Senior Senator from Midvale. |
|
|
|
Gnome-ad
Nomad
Posts: 156
Registered: 6-4-2007
Location: Todos Santos, BCS
Member Is Offline
Mood: Okey-Dokey
|
|
Osprey ~
I hate to say it, but it may have been a friend of ours here in TS who caused this. He kept saying for a couple of weeks and I quote exactly, "I
want to experience a real hurricane and have my panties scared off." It was a case of be careful what you wish for with second thoughts expressed
as Henriette came closer. He found out you can't watch the US Open or whatever when the electricity is out ...
Hope your life and garden can return to normal soon.
The only normal people are the ones you don't know very well. - Ancis
|
|
|
CaboRon
Ultra Nomad
Posts: 3401
Registered: 3-24-2007
Location: The Valley of the Moon
Member Is Offline
Mood: Peacefull
|
|
| Quote: | Originally posted by Dave
| Quote: | Originally posted by Don Alley
C'mon...no such place in Idaho.
|
Just ask the Senior Senator from Midvale. |
He sure stuck his foot in it didn't he
|
|
|
CaboRon
Ultra Nomad
Posts: 3401
Registered: 3-24-2007
Location: The Valley of the Moon
Member Is Offline
Mood: Peacefull
|
|
| Quote: | Originally posted by Gnome-ad
Osprey ~
I hate to say it, but it may have been a friend of ours here in TS who caused this. He kept saying for a couple of weeks and I quote exactly, "I
want to experience a real hurricane and have my panties scared off." It was a case of be careful what you wish for with second thoughts expressed
as Henriette came closer. He found out you can't watch the US Open or whatever when the electricity is out ...
Hope your life and garden can return to normal soon. |
Gnome_ad,
We need names.......
It appears that the TV Gods punished him for his transgressions....
CaboRon
|
|
|
CaboRon
Ultra Nomad
Posts: 3401
Registered: 3-24-2007
Location: The Valley of the Moon
Member Is Offline
Mood: Peacefull
|
|
| Quote: | Originally posted by Gnome-ad
Osprey ~
I hate to say it, but it may have been a friend of ours here in TS who caused this. He kept saying for a couple of weeks and I quote exactly, "I
want to experience a real hurricane and have my panties scared off." It was a case of be careful what you wish for with second thoughts expressed
as Henriette came closer. He found out you can't watch the US Open or whatever when the electricity is out ...
Hope your life and garden can return to normal soon. |
Gnome_ad,
It wasn't Amir was it ?
I thought his posts during the storm were getting a little whimsical
CaboRon
|
|
|
Gnome-ad
Nomad
Posts: 156
Registered: 6-4-2007
Location: Todos Santos, BCS
Member Is Offline
Mood: Okey-Dokey
|
|
CaboRon ~
To protect the non-innocent I cannot divulge names, but I
WILL SAY that it was not me or Amir who wished for any such events … no danger of us annoying the TV gods either, unless it
annoys them that we currently don’t own a TV (poor us).
The only normal people are the ones you don't know very well. - Ancis
|
|
|
DENNIS
Platinum Nomad
Posts: 29510
Registered: 9-2-2006
Location: Punta Banda
Member Is Offline
|
|
| Quote: | Originally posted by Gnome-ad
Osprey ~
"I want to experience a real hurricane and have my panties scared off." It was a case of be careful what you wish for with second thoughts
expressed as Henriette came closer. He found out you can't watch the US Open or whatever when the electricity is out ...
|
"He" wears panties?
|
|
|
woody with a view
PITA Nomad
Posts: 15938
Registered: 11-8-2004
Location: Looking at the Coronado Islands
Member Is Offline
Mood: Everchangin'
|
|
| Quote: | Originally posted by DENNIS
| Quote: | Originally posted by Gnome-ad
Osprey ~
"I want to experience a real hurricane and have my panties scared off." It was a case of be careful what you wish for with second thoughts
expressed as Henriette came closer. He found out you can't watch the US Open or whatever when the electricity is out ...
|
"He" wears panties? |
are we the only ones that noticed, Dennis?
|
|
|
woody with a view
PITA Nomad
Posts: 15938
Registered: 11-8-2004
Location: Looking at the Coronado Islands
Member Is Offline
Mood: Everchangin'
|
|
| Quote: | Originally posted by Dave
| Quote: | Originally posted by capn.sharky
I have heard of Bum---k, India....but Weaselbreath, Arkansas is a new one to me. |
It's either Bum---k, Iowa or Idaho. I've heard there is also a Bum---k, Egypt but...who cares?
|
it is two counties over from "Pigsknuckle, Arkansas"
|
|
|
Gnome-ad
Nomad
Posts: 156
Registered: 6-4-2007
Location: Todos Santos, BCS
Member Is Offline
Mood: Okey-Dokey
|
|
Hey you guys ~
I only reported what I heard him say (more than once). I did not check to see if he actually wears panties ... I will take his word
for it and will not check, even if you plead with me.
I did ask after the storm how his panties were and if indeed they were scared off. He replied, "Nearly."
The only normal people are the ones you don't know very well. - Ancis
|
|
|
vandy
Senior Nomad
Posts: 538
Registered: 10-10-2003
Member Is Offline
|
|
In my environmental science classes in North Carolina a few years ago, I had a professor who said that blaming a hurricane for the destruction of your
home is like painting yourself gray, lying in the road and blaming the truck that hits you.
|
|
|
Osprey
Ultra Nomad
Posts: 3694
Registered: 5-23-2004
Location: Baja Ca. Sur
Member Is Offline
|
|
Vandy, I was just having some fictional fun. Can't blame the hurricane for where you chose to live -- after all, it is The Tropics. So I blamed a
guy in San Lucas. Your prof brings up some interesting foundation for existential pondering. How about painting yourself yellow and laying on the
center line? How about the tope position? Go out proudly being a tope. And down here most folks hug the center, many go around the topes. b-tching
and complaining about my troubles is my hobby anyway so I wouldn't, couldn't live anywhere else.
|
|
|
Cypress
Elite Nomad
Posts: 7641
Registered: 3-12-2006
Location: on the bayou
Member Is Offline
Mood: undecided
|
|
It's too cold in Idaho for hurricanes, but that guy can come up here this winter and freeze his panties off. I intend to be down in Mulege.  Anybody
know of a 3 or 4 month rental that will be available from Nov. thru March at a very reasonable rate? Two people. No pets. Please u2u if you have/know
of anything. Thanks.
|
|
|
woody with a view
PITA Nomad
Posts: 15938
Registered: 11-8-2004
Location: Looking at the Coronado Islands
Member Is Offline
Mood: Everchangin'
|
|
| Quote: |
Go out proudly being a tope
|
|
|
|
| Pages:
1
2 |
![[*]](images/xmbforum/default_icon.gif){kind=icon}
