| Pages:
1
..
3
4
5
6
7
..
9 |
wessongroup
Platinum Nomad
Posts: 21152
Registered: 8-9-2009
Location: Mission Viejo
Member Is Offline
Mood: Suicide Hot line ... please hold
|
|
Any "links" 
|
|
|
BajaParrothead
Nomad
Posts: 460
Registered: 12-4-2012
Location: Portola, CA / Los Barriles
Member Is Offline
|
|
Here's another working from home reporter getting caught! 
www.comicsands.com/reporter-naked-woman-walks-through-264587...
|
|
|
Paco Facullo
Super Nomad
Posts: 1301
Registered: 1-21-2017
Location: Here now
Member Is Offline
Mood: Abiding ..........
|
|
In the year 2020, the Lord came unto Noah, who was now living in America and said:
"Once again, the earth has become wicked and over-populated, and I see the end of all flesh before me."
"Build another Ark and save 2 of every living thing along with a few good humans."
He gave Noah the blueprints, saying:
"You have 6 months to build the Ark before I will start the unending rain for 40 days and 40 nights."
Six months later, the Lord looked down and saw Noah weeping in his yard - but no Ark."Noah!," He roared, "I'm about to start the rain! Where is the
Ark?"
"Forgive me, Lord," begged Noah, "but things have changed."
"I needed a Building Permit."
"I've been arguing with the Boat Inspector about the need for a sprinkler system."
"My homeowners association claim that I've violated the
Neighborhood by-laws by building the Ark in my back yard and exceeding the height limitations. We had to go to the local Planning Committee for a
decision."
"Then the City Council and the Electricity Company demanded a shed load of money for the future costs of moving power lines and other overhead
obstructions, to clear the passage for the Ark's move to the sea. I told them that the sea would be coming to us, but they would hear none of it."
"Getting the wood was another problem. There's a ban on cutting local trees in order to save the Greater Spotted Barn Owl."
"I tried to convince the environmentalists that I needed the wood to save the owls - but no go!"
"When I started gathering the animals, PETA took me to court. They insisted that I was confining wild animals against their will. They argued the
accommodations were too restrictive and it was cruel and inhumane to put so many animals in a confined space."
"Then the Environmental Protection Agency ruled that I couldn't build the Ark until they'd conducted an environmental impact study on Your proposed
flood."
"I'm still trying to resolve a complaint with the Human Rights Commission on how many minorities I'm supposed to hire for my building crew."
"The Immigration Dept. Is checking the visa status of most of the people who want to work."
"The labor unions say I can't use my sons. They insist I have to hire only union workers with ark-building experience."
"To make matters worse, the IRS seized all my assets, claiming I'm trying to leave the country illegally with endangered species."
"So, forgive me, Lord, but it would take at least 10 years for me to finish this ark."
"Suddenly the skies cleared, the sun began to shine and a rainbow stretched across the sky."
Noah looked up in wonder and asked, "You mean you're not going to destroy the world?"
"No," said the Lord. " The Government beat me to it."
End........
And David k's Palm trees are still well above the shore line ......
[Edited on 5-3-2020 by Paco Facullo]
Since I've given up all hope, I feel much better
|
|
|
MrBillM
Platinum Nomad
Posts: 21656
Registered: 8-20-2003
Location: Out and About
Member Is Offline
Mood: It's a Zip-a-Dee-Doo-Dah Day
|
|
Getting Back to Normal
Carpe Diem, Dudes ?
Seize the day in L.A. and make it pay.
There was some L.A. footage earlier showing the crowds no longer doing much distancing and being begged for bucks by the unclean as a result.
Their gathering being a perfect opportunity for targeting by (unmasked) homeless panhandlers.
American entrepreneurship at its finest.
Funny.
|
|
|
Skipjack Joe
Elite Nomad
Posts: 8084
Registered: 7-12-2004
Location: Bahia Asuncion
Member Is Offline
|
|
Corovirus greetings
|
|
|
ncampion
Super Nomad
Posts: 1238
Registered: 4-15-2006
Location: Loreto
Member Is Offline
Mood: Retired and Loving it
|
|
George Carlin was way ahead of his time:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X29lF43mUlo
Living Large in Loreto. Off-grid and happy.
|
|
|
MrBillM
Platinum Nomad
Posts: 21656
Registered: 8-20-2003
Location: Out and About
Member Is Offline
Mood: It's a Zip-a-Dee-Doo-Dah Day
|
|
Are You Kidding ?
"Apparently" related to the crisis ?
Stopping at the Flyers station on the way out of town this a.m. for Sunday newspapers, the wife returns to the truck and comments
that they have a new sign at the counter to the effect "Ladies - With the coming warm weather, we will no longer accept cash from your
Bra".
Living in the desert for fifty years and never having seen a sign like that before, I assumed that it must be some sort of joke, but she tells me that
such cash carry is common and (I suppose) that the bills could get a bit nasty in sweaty weather.
|
|
|
Paco Facullo
Super Nomad
Posts: 1301
Registered: 1-21-2017
Location: Here now
Member Is Offline
Mood: Abiding ..........
|
|
I agree !
One of the greatest ever. If you haven't yet, you must read "last words" A great read.....
Since I've given up all hope, I feel much better
|
|
|
Paco Facullo
Super Nomad
Posts: 1301
Registered: 1-21-2017
Location: Here now
Member Is Offline
Mood: Abiding ..........
|
|
Quote: Originally posted by MrBillM  | "Apparently" related to the crisis ?
Stopping at the Flyers station on the way out of town this a.m. for Sunday newspapers, the wife returns to the truck and comments
that they have a new sign at the counter to the effect "Ladies - With the coming warm weather, we will no longer accept cash from your
Bra".
Living in the desert for fifty years and never having seen a sign like that before, I assumed that it must be some sort of joke, but she tells me that
such cash carry is common and (I suppose) that the bills could get a bit nasty in sweaty weather. |
There's also "shoe money" for the Gents.....
It's a Hood thang ......
Since I've given up all hope, I feel much better
|
|
|
MrBillM
Platinum Nomad
Posts: 21656
Registered: 8-20-2003
Location: Out and About
Member Is Offline
Mood: It's a Zip-a-Dee-Doo-Dah Day
|
|
Going Off Half-C.ocked ?
Funny story in the L.A. Times this a.m.
Police responding to a loud (illegal) party call in West Hollywood called for backup after hearing a gunshot inside the residence.
Upon entering, they found a man with a gunshot wound to the groin which was "apparently accidentally self-inflicted".
Reminds me of a TV doc on street gangs we were watching many years ago.
One of the street hoods being interviewed pulls his gun out from under his shirt, waves it about while jabbering and stuffs it back under his
belt.
BAM ! The guy staggers and falls into the gutter.
A GREAT TV moment.
|
|
|
msteve1014
Senior Nomad
Posts: 947
Registered: 12-2-2006
Member Is Offline
|
|
Nothing funnier that a dumb *ss with a gun. I watched a guy drink 6 beers then put the cans on the hood of his truck for target practice. got the
first 3, then put one through the fender and into the carb. 40 miles back in the hills. It's all fun and games until someone get hurt, then it's
hilarious.
|
|
|
SFandH
Elite Nomad
Posts: 7084
Registered: 8-5-2011
Member Is Offline
|
|
The spread of the COVID-19 virus is based on two factors:
1. How dense the population is.
2. How dense the population is.
|
|
|
EdZeranski
Nomad
Posts: 290
Registered: 11-4-2008
Location: Ocean Beach/Borrego Springs
Member Is Offline
Mood: Si! Como no???
|
|
Like watching the Korean shop owners during the Rodney King celebrations
|
|
|
Skipjack Joe
Elite Nomad
Posts: 8084
Registered: 7-12-2004
Location: Bahia Asuncion
Member Is Offline
|
|
Corny, but what the heck.
|
|
|
Lee
Ultra Nomad
Posts: 3511
Registered: 10-2-2006
Location: High in the Colorado Rockies
Member Is Offline
|
|
US Marines: providing enemies of America an opportunity to die for their country since 1775.
What I say before any important decision.
F*ck it.
|
|
|
MrBillM
Platinum Nomad
Posts: 21656
Registered: 8-20-2003
Location: Out and About
Member Is Offline
Mood: It's a Zip-a-Dee-Doo-Dah Day
|
|
No Problem for Working Girls
Most won't kiss.
|
|
|
Paco Facullo
Super Nomad
Posts: 1301
Registered: 1-21-2017
Location: Here now
Member Is Offline
Mood: Abiding ..........
|
|
And how do you know of such things ????
.
[Edited on 5-24-2020 by Paco Facullo]
Since I've given up all hope, I feel much better
|
|
|
MrBillM
Platinum Nomad
Posts: 21656
Registered: 8-20-2003
Location: Out and About
Member Is Offline
Mood: It's a Zip-a-Dee-Doo-Dah Day
|
|
Empirical Knowledge
A result of dedicated international research over many years.
Years ago, of course, but I've heard that the conclusions still hold true.
|
|
|
Lee
Ultra Nomad
Posts: 3511
Registered: 10-2-2006
Location: High in the Colorado Rockies
Member Is Offline
|
|
US Marines: providing enemies of America an opportunity to die for their country since 1775.
What I say before any important decision.
F*ck it.
|
|
|
Skipjack Joe
Elite Nomad
Posts: 8084
Registered: 7-12-2004
Location: Bahia Asuncion
Member Is Offline
|
|
|
|
|
| Pages:
1
..
3
4
5
6
7
..
9 |
![[*]](images/xmbforum/default_icon.gif){kind=icon}
